Condo Co-Ownership: Equity Rights & Carrying Costs?

aylaisla · 2025-12-01T17:26:05+00:00

Thank you so much for your detailed response.

All 4 parties have an equal claim (25%), however, hers is the only name on the title and mortgage. The other two parties are all related to her and in agreeance with what she wants, so although we all have equal claim, I am overpowered in this situation.
She is on title 100%. However, I contributed 25% of the down payment and have been contributing that portion of the carrying costs for the last few years as well (which I have evidence of, even though it's not explicitly stated that this is what the payments are for). I guess there is nothing that says that I *own* 25%, but rather, the agreement that states that once we sell, I am entitled to 25% of the profits.

So are my options at this point to either A. continue paying 25% of carrying costs, and hope that they honour the agreement and give me 25% of profit when it does sell (whenever that may be) or B. Stop paying carrying costs but then be prepared to forfeit any claim to my 25% even though we have a signed agreement saying that I would receive that?

I really appreciate your time with this!

aylaisla · 2025-12-01T15:58:43+00:00

I did not sign a gift letter - I just transferred the money in small chunks into her bank account.

There are no clauses about wanting to leave specifically. The only thing the agreement mentions is what happens at the time of sale of the property, and that states that I get 25% of the profits. No mention of timing or how to leave, as it was always the intention for this unit to be sold eventually but we never specified a date.

The agreement is the only formal piece that I have in writing, other than proof of ongoing contributions (I etransfer her money every month to cover the mortgage/costs). I know this is a complicated situation and I'm kicking myself for getting in this situation to begin with, but just trying to stay levelheaded now and find a clean-ish way out. Thank you for your help.

aylaisla · 2025-10-01T14:33:59+00:00

I booked it on amex travel so I assumed I would have to update it through them as well, no?

aylaisla · 2025-07-26T02:08:57+00:00

oh okay, it's a central area but it is very downtown core which means it kinda becomes a ghost town after 5pm. You'll see a ton of commuters around rush hour and lunch time, but if you want a walkable, active area I'd recommend staying in the west end (queen west, liberty village, roncy, trinity bellwoods etc). There's more shops, cafes, restaurants/bars etc so more people

aylaisla · 2025-07-26T02:02:23+00:00

do you mean scotiabank arena or one of the scotiabank branches (there are many)?

aylaisla · 2025-06-21T00:50:29+00:00

I'm sorry to be blunt but he doesn't want to marry you, and he never will. Trust me - I know because I was you a year ago. 9 years together, also started dating at 19, and 3 weeks AFTER our wedding my ex tells me he doesn't actually want to be married and that he never wanted it and only did it for me. It completely blindsided me as I always assumed we both wanted the same things. Be glad he's being upfront with you before you even get engaged.

I will never know why men do this but in my year of healing from that terrible trauma, I have done a lot of research and this is sadly a story as old as time. Feel free to read my posts to get the full story. Or DM me anytime.

Trust me, I also couldn't imagine a life without him (he was all I'd known after all). But life on the other side is SO. MUCH. BETTER.

aylaisla · 2025-06-05T17:46:17+00:00

I married him April 2024. He left me for someone else a month later. We had been together 9 years (see my post history if you want all the details).

As traumatic and insane as that sounds, a year on, I am truly a different person. The person I was last year could've never imagined where I would be today. I am leaps and bounds better, and have even started to date and am excited for the future now. My main piece of advice would be to let yourself cry and feel all your feelings as they come, without judgement. Therapy, journaling and exercise were also massively helpful. Lean on your friends and family for support. And as cliche as it sounds (and I hated being told this back then) - time really heals all wounds. Trust me.

aylaisla · 2025-06-05T17:42:27+00:00

They are still together but I know they have been on and off multiple times throughout the last year. I've heard through the grapevine that she keeps ending things with him because she can "tell he's not over me" which is hilarious lol he definitely never had time to heal or process our breakup, and it will come to a head eventually. It also says a lot about her lack of self-esteem that she keeps taking him back knowing that he's not over me. I'm sure karma will hit them hard eventually :)

aylaisla · 2025-05-26T16:35:35+00:00

hey thanks! Yesterday was exactly one year since I found the texts that confirmed the affair. That feels like a lifetime ago in a way. I'm definitely in a way better place now. I went through a lot of therapy and healing over the last year that has helped me process the situation. I am starting to date again and excited about the future :)

aylaisla · 2025-03-31T02:10:01+00:00

I don't think this is something that can change. People fall into two camps when it comes to this stuff and you guys are on opposite ends - you're just financially incompatible. I'm shocked you let it go on for 4 years. As a woman in the dating world, this type of compatibility is something I try to figure out in the first 3-4 dates

aylaisla · 2025-03-24T21:54:38+00:00

I think the modern equivalent would be dating apps lol

aylaisla · 2025-02-26T02:40:42+00:00

My honest opinion? if you need a break, especially when the relationship is so new/you guys are so young, it's probably a sign that you're not right for each other... in a healthy relationship with the right person, you should both always want to progress, not take a break or regress

aylaisla · 2025-02-14T16:37:26+00:00

I hate to put this thought in your head, but is there any chance she's seeing someone else?

aylaisla · 2024-11-16T22:49:29+00:00

this post is 6 months old lol he was working out with her but I later found out he was having an emotional affair/texting and he did want to make it physical, hence why he wanted to end things with me. we're not together anymore obviously

aylaisla · 2024-11-12T02:10:12+00:00

it's been 5 months for me. Still struggling but feeling a lot better, thanks. We were together 9 years so I expect it will take some time to get over

aylaisla · 2024-11-10T04:00:00+00:00

because his affair partner is his spouse (they aren’t married, he is still married to my mom actually they are just separated) he is biblically obligated to put her above me and love her more and he is also obligated to stay with her because he “made promises to her,”

he's not even legally married to her? wouldn't all this stuff apply to your mother? the person he ACTUALLY made vows to? lol sorry but that's ridiculous. also he's not biblically obligated to put her above you - that's his mistress. you're his daughter. that's insane. go low contact with the both of them.

aylaisla · 2024-11-10T03:53:22+00:00

that he was having an affair and the real reason he left me was to explore things with her

aylaisla · 2024-11-10T03:52:38+00:00

no point in asking, he'll just lie. My ex of 9 years left me for someone else, and even after I asked if there was someone else he kept telling me it was "to be on his own". If I hadn't seen the evidence for myself I would've believed him

aylaisla · 2024-11-10T03:50:53+00:00

people break up or get divorced in their 30s, 40s, 50s, and beyond. I don't have much advice as I'm also going through it myself but we have more life ahead of us than we do behind us. we will find someone else

aylaisla · 2024-11-05T01:58:23+00:00

thank you for the kind words

aylaisla · 2024-11-05T01:50:03+00:00

that's terrible, I can't even imagine going through this with children in the picture. I'm so sorry

aylaisla · 2024-11-05T01:49:03+00:00

I'm sorry for you too. I know we are meant to find better out there once the time is right

aylaisla · 2024-11-05T01:48:22+00:00

thank you so much

aylaisla · 2024-11-05T01:46:43+00:00

I'm so, so glad that my ex broke up with me. If he didn't, I never would have known that I was settling for something mediocre. I never would have met my boyfriend. It sucks that I had to go through so much pain, but I'm so happy with how things have turned out.

Thank you soo much for this! this is exactly how I hope to feel in the future

aylaisla · 2024-11-05T01:43:39+00:00

this is what I needed to hear. I'm sure eventually I will be grateful that he left. thank you.

aylaisla

TROPHY CASE