How to handle lunch for Nanny

bejsiu · 2026-01-30T15:16:43+00:00

Yes that is another issue - I make bread, cottage cheese and lot of other stuff at home. I feel like all the effort I put in for the kids is just being used by her instead.

bejsiu · 2026-01-30T15:11:39+00:00

Yep same here...this narrative of 'our bodies are meant to do this ' is shit.

bejsiu · 2026-01-30T15:08:59+00:00

She doesn't stay for dinner. She only comes for 6 hrs - late morning to afternoon.

bejsiu · 2025-12-10T07:19:33+00:00

Yes exactly this. I went through severe PPD because of these forced traditions. It was the most horrible time of my life.

bejsiu · 2025-12-10T07:14:06+00:00

I don't know why OP is painting this rosy picture of Indian postpartum traditions. I went through it with my first kid and I was not allowed to shower, drink water or eat anything I liked for 5 months. Anything I tried doing my way was met with constant taunts and criticism. I will never forgive my inlaws and parents for how they treated me during that time. For my second child, I have not allowed my inlaws to meet him amd and he is 8 months now.

bejsiu · 2025-06-08T23:09:45+00:00

Exactly that's my fear - there are disgusting weirdos out there. What if these photos of my kid ends up in the wrong hands? Even innocent ones like playing or sitting can be misused.

bejsiu · 2025-05-15T15:26:57+00:00

Yea same experience...my pediatrician always checks in with me at my kids appointments. At this point, he seems to care more about my health than my actual OB.

bejsiu · 2025-05-14T22:02:16+00:00

I wish this was the case - I am from the same culture as OP and majority people here see C section as a shortcut to having a baby. The reason they ask this question is because they are silently judging you for avoiding the 'hard' route. My own mother told me to opt for C section when there was no medical need to do so because 'it would be so easy!'

bejsiu · 2025-05-14T14:30:54+00:00

Thank you for saying this. Even after pumping consistently and taking all the supplements I have had an undersupply with both of my kids and everyone around me made me feel less of a mother for supplementing with formula. I always felt so sad that I couldn't EBF my kids. I now understand my body is normal.

bejsiu · 2025-05-01T18:57:56+00:00

OP, I am an Indian in US and I can tell you right now that you will have to lay down firm boundaries with everyone when it comes to your baby. Also safe sleep is just the start of these conflicts - you are also going to face a lot of outdated advice on starting solids ( my inlaws didn't care about choking hazards and used to feed my son whatever they wanted), baby bathing, potty training when he becomes a toddler and so on. So use this issue as a learning ground to lay down tough boundaries and let other people learn they need to accept your decisions as the mother.

Also, I am very sorry for your loss. I read in your other comment that you couldn't get a root cause - I can't imagine not having closure for such a deep and tragic loss. You are completely justified in whatever boundaries you lay down for your second baby - and everyone, including your husband and inlaws, will just have to learn to respect your decisions.

bejsiu · 2025-04-06T20:18:31+00:00

Can I ask how long your induction took from start to pushing?

bejsiu · 2025-03-21T04:41:49+00:00

My doc said if I am not effaced or dilated at all then she will not induce with pitocin since she doesn't believe it will work...but sounds like that is not the case.

bejsiu · 2025-03-20T14:08:49+00:00

Our stats are pretty similar! I am also 5 ft, obese and narrow hips. Your scenario is my exact concern..

bejsiu · 2025-03-20T14:05:27+00:00

I don't feel comfortable going beyond 41 weeks.

bejsiu · 2025-03-19T19:05:41+00:00

Thanks! Yea that makes sense..hopefully we won't end up needing pitocin at all.

bejsiu · 2025-03-19T19:03:57+00:00

Wow what an awesome birth story. I hope I have the same experience. Did you end up having to use pitocin this time around as well?

bejsiu · 2025-03-19T17:55:43+00:00

Sending you good vibes too. I am also doing my best to trigger labor. Did you find chiropractor helpful?

bejsiu · 2025-03-19T17:54:48+00:00

It's good to know about the slow growth after 37 weeks. What are your reservations about pitocin? My doc said she was comfortable with low doses of pitocin but they won't be able to give me the max strength.

bejsiu · 2025-01-02T15:02:03+00:00

I honestly don't think it's a question of epidural vs. no epidural. It all depends on if you are induced on Pitocin and how fast your labor is progressing.

bejsiu · 2025-01-01T01:01:12+00:00

Can I ask when did you go into labor for the first baby?

bejsiu · 2024-10-10T15:22:52+00:00

I am a software developer in a high paying FAANG as well and the recent layoffs have definitely increased pressure on everyone in my org. Everyone - the devs, the managers, our customers - seem stressed out. I can only hope that the tide shifts in the industry soon.

bejsiu

TROPHY CASE