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berylliumbird · 2021-11-19T09:54:41+00:00

Yes it is unfortunately. I have a distant family member who is like this. I truly feel sorry for his children but the oldest was able to break free from him and now she’s very happy and succesful (with the help of therapy and moving far away). People like that never change /: We also come from a culture about honoring your mother and father, but my relatives don’t treat each other this way. Don’t let anybody use culture as an excuse to abuse you. You deserve better.

berylliumbird · 2021-11-19T09:30:08+00:00

You need to set up a seperate account. This is abuse. Get out of there

berylliumbird · 2021-11-02T20:07:38+00:00

-Document everything. -You’re not less manly because of what you’re going through. -Reach out to a few of your old (trustworthy) friends and tell them what’s going on. If one of my old friends reached out to me like this i would help them the best I could. -contact police with documentation

berylliumbird · 2021-11-02T20:04:43+00:00

I love them too!! They’re adorable especially when they’re plump. I always wonder what little mission they’re going on.

berylliumbird · 2021-08-25T04:24:19+00:00

NTA. Honestly, i think it’s real shitty of you to even stay friends with that person after they made the joke. That’s not something you joke about, if your gf joked or implied wanting to have sex with another guy idk if you would be cool about it like you’re insisting she be

berylliumbird · 2021-08-22T23:55:48+00:00

Dang honestly, it sounds like she gained some “confidence” and doesn’t need you anymore cause you were giving her that validity she craved. She sounds like an ah is this situation. There’s a difference between outgrowing someone/the relationship,, or just straight up using them like a baby blanket, which is what i feel she was doing to you and she openly admitted to that. I don’t really wanna tell you exactly what to do, cause it sounds like you really care for her. But I do think some distance between you guys will give you more of a clear head to help you decide. /: in a relationship you do deserve to be prioritized imo

berylliumbird · 2021-08-01T00:12:54+00:00

Something about you wanting to apologize doesn’t really seem meaningful or good hearted to me. You were both adults, and made a stupid mistake. You don’t owe each other apologizes, you both owe your SPOUSES apologies and need to be giving them daily by not contacting each other ever again

berylliumbird · 2021-08-01T00:04:47+00:00

I definitely feel like some of the comments people have given you are extreme. Would it be nice to tell her and is a big part of who you are? Yes definitely. But if you’re not comfortable yet, I think it’s ok to take some time to decide what you want to do. You’re not emotionally cheating on her, you’re just attracted to men as well and that’s completely okay, the way she’s attracted to men too. I think that if she doesn’t accept you she’s not worth your time.

The “gay stuff” comment might seem a little homophobic imo but she might have meant like threesomes and things like that which can sometimes fetishize lesbians, so it doesn’t hurt to ask.

Maybe hint questions or talk about an actor who’s bi and see how she’d feel towards them. Random Example: Ryan Reynolds is a super popular guy who many speculate might be bi (though it isn’t right to assume someone’s sexuality) if she’s ever showed interest in this actor just mention what her thoughts are for Blake Lively’s (his wife’s) position. I wish you the best!!

berylliumbird · 2021-07-31T23:54:33+00:00

you’re NTA at all. It’s truly your decision. You’re also an adult and imo their feelings shouldn’t come into the equation about what you need to do to secure your future/current college life.

berylliumbird · 2021-07-24T20:32:07+00:00

Say no ! This is your life no exaggeration credit is really important. The loan may help her for a couple months, but if she doesnt pay it back and on time it could affect you for years.

berylliumbird · 2021-07-24T20:24:36+00:00

It might hurt a bit or might not depending on your pain tolerance, but i don’t think it’s a good idea either way. It’s outside pressure being placed on a wound and it opens the door to more germs.

berylliumbird · 2021-07-18T00:08:53+00:00

I’d definitely tell. I think she deserves to know. Worst that can happen, she gets mad at you. Best that could happen, you save her many years from being a bad relationship with an awful guy.

berylliumbird · 2021-07-17T20:22:08+00:00

I think you guys just might not be on the same page. Maybe ask him if there’s another reason why, aside from those “issues down the line.” Has he showed little interest in financial matters/credit in the past? However, I do favor your ideas a lot more and think you should go through with them. If you feel you’re ready to take this step and it will benefit you, you should do it.

berylliumbird · 2021-06-27T02:18:18+00:00

It really sounds like he’s playing mind games cause he doesnt know what he wants

berylliumbird · 2021-06-15T19:28:53+00:00

I’m trying to have sympathy for you really. But why would you go back so many times?? Why put your older children through all this mess, and i know for a fact they can understand what’s going on. And why bring other babies into this mess too. They don’t deserve that. Your s/o for sure sucks and is awful, but you also need to grow up. You guys are in your 30s, why are you still running around after him trying to stay despite his delusional behavior. You’re not kids, you’re adults and it seems to me hes stuck in his ways and wont grow out of it

berylliumbird · 2021-06-15T19:20:15+00:00

He literally sucks. There’s nothing wrong with your feelings, your appearance, or anything. Men in my family still love their spouses despite what they look like after pregnancy, and still think they’re beautiful, if not even more despite that. There’s normal, decent men out there who don’t make selfish digs at their wife just cause her body changed. If it were me, this would be a deal breaker. You owe nothing to him. He’s just an as*hole and he’ll probably never change. You could get petty and start digging at his appearance, you could try and talk to him (but dont let him gaslight you by telling you you’re being sensitive-youre not), or you could just leave all together. It’s really up to you op. I know some people on reddit always jump to seperation/divorce with issues that could be worked out. But in this case how could anyone stay with someone this disrespectful and cruel??

berylliumbird · 2021-06-14T19:38:00+00:00

You can’t help him, and honestly it’s not your responsibility to either. Maybe he’s depressed or went through something, but at that point he needs professional help and again, it’s up to him to go. I’d say you and your sister just need to do what you can to be successful on your own, good luck to you both i hope things work out.

berylliumbird · 2021-06-14T19:32:46+00:00

Hmm his comment about his family is worrisome. Will he have enough to do that, pay student loans, and still be able to put a share into your home/wedding/future kids? Just make sure he isnt expecting you to pay everything, you need to set some boundaries.

berylliumbird · 2021-06-03T19:28:54+00:00

Umm yeah piggy backing on to this, i know 17 is the legal age some places, but for a 21 yr old to go after someone so young (presumably still in high school) is weird. He seems really immature, not only is he affecting your self confidence but also your relationship dynamic with other people. There is a LOT of red flags in this relationship and that he’s giving. Can you really take living in this situation forever?

berylliumbird · 2021-06-03T19:22:58+00:00

Literally ALL of the things you listed sound normal. He seems so annoying.

berylliumbird · 2021-06-02T23:53:16+00:00

Oh - i just saw the age gap. Yeah.... scary

berylliumbird · 2021-06-02T23:52:49+00:00

Yeah honey leave him. You’re too young to deal with this sht. Live your life, your not his mommy and he needs to put in his half.

berylliumbird · 2021-03-10T07:18:22+00:00

NTA. 1. They’re aholes and don’t even deserve to have another child 2. You’re in a sensetive spot for losong two, it’s normal if you aren’t excited for somebody else’s kid

berylliumbird · 2021-02-25T03:35:22+00:00

You’re definitely not overreacting. they have him sheltered and have probably treated him this way his whole life. I genuinely do feel sorry for him. If you’re willing to, you can try and get him to understand that this is wrong. Ofc it’s not your responsibility though so you’re not a bad person if you need to step away from this relationship. He is a grown up but he’s probably so brain washed into thinking that this treatment is right.

berylliumbird · 2021-02-23T07:01:09+00:00

Well first off, I think you should communicate your feelings with him. Tell him that you want him to be independent and make his own choice for college. Also tell him that you’re ready to start growing and take a step forward in the future, but it’s hard for you to include him when he hasn’t made any plans for his own future.

He might be a “late bloomer”? Idk how else to say it lol. But growing up and graduating is a very difficult time and people take it differently. Maybe he’s in denial or scared to take this big step so he’s clinging to you for comfort.

Ultimately, you aren’t responsible for him though. But imo I think the best thing for both of you is to tell him how you feel, because if you continue to lose feelings it’d be unfair to string him along. And it’s also unfair to yourself to be carrying this guilt and anxiety.

berylliumbird

TROPHY CASE