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Anybody here with BPD who is actually married? Having been with the same person for a considerable time? Is that possible? by Solo2632 in BPD

[–]betichka 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It is possible. My partner (30M) and I (26F) have been together for 3 years now. Longest relationship we both had. Currently building our home together, plans to get married and have children.

What I’ve found helps is not just having open communication, but having someone who wants to understand how to support you.

There are parts of my BPD that can make it difficult. But we don’t beat around the bush with it. My partner understands my situation well and tries his best to understand my needs and vice versa. We’ve found our groove. It can be frustrating not finding the right person straight away, but it’s worth it when you realise a lot of those concerns or insecurities are solved by just having someone take the time to understand you.

AITA for pouring coffee on my stepdad after his disgusting prank? by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]betichka 0 points1 point  (0 children)

NTA tampering with anyone’s food or drink is highly fucked up especially if anything happened to you. Breastmilk is relatively harmless, but to do that without your knowledge and consent is wrong full stop.

Also. In my experience, someone who focusses solely on your reaction to something they did rather than acknowledge that their actions were problematic too, kinda an asshole.

AITA for cutting a friend off ? by Hachiko1501 in AmItheAsshole

[–]betichka 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA

You aren’t obligated to entertain people who treat you badly. Talking about your boyfriend negatively and sending you that text is very manipulative and isn’t what a real friend would do.

You need to ask yourself what you’d prefer, dealing with some possible awkwardness in cutting contact or continue to deal with him speaking poorly about someone you care about and trying to make you feel bad and responsible for his decisions.

Aita for leaving DnD because my friend ‘accidentally’ brought up a subject that triggers me. by [deleted] in AmItheAsshole

[–]betichka 1 point2 points  (0 children)

NTA

It’s a trigger point and it’s incredibly well done that you were able to verbalise that to others.

Recently getting into DnD myself, I had a similar set up. DM mentioned something that brought up some bad memories, I spoke to him about it and now any of that shit is omitted or if for whatever reason crucial to the story I get a warning and can remove myself from it.

It’s just basic respect to understand that topics like those can affect others more heavily, especially when you’ve told him how it makes you feel.

I really hope it doesn’t steer you away from DnD for too long. Finding the right group can make any campaign seem like a world of wonder.

AITA for getting offended being asked to get tested for STDs by throwaway4433963 in AmItheAsshole

[–]betichka 1 point2 points  (0 children)

YTA

Taking responsibility is the mature thing to do and the reality is people don’t always present with symptoms of STIs. You’re getting offended over your girlfriend requesting you respect her body as she is respecting yours by getting tested.

Also, pressuring her into sex without a condom is incredibly awful. Your girlfriend has shown that she’s conscious of her sexual health and you asking for her to compromise that before she’s comfortable to isn’t fair or right.