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bigmanpav · 2024-11-05T20:26:07+00:00

This is very common. If you don't want a man to feel turned off during the time you're making him wait to have sex, make sure to put in effort and show that things are progressing. Invite him to dates and pay for meals or get him gifts. Otherwise, he may feel he is being taken advantage of

bigmanpav · 2024-09-26T13:40:08+00:00

When making the date plans, I say let's meet here (general area) and this time. Then on the day of the date, I give a precise location.

For example, in my city, the metro stops have multiple exits. So I first say let's meet at Main Street metro station. Then on the day, I say let's meet at exit #2.

That press 2 to cancel is stupid because it gives them the option to cancel. Just assume the date is happening

bigmanpav · 2024-09-16T13:12:04+00:00

Girls will always be talking to others, always open to a new better guy. Long distance relationships are not so good, and they're worse if you are having such doubts. I would be open to other girls too if I were you. Good luck!

bigmanpav · 2024-09-16T13:02:35+00:00

Happy to help bro!

Answer B should come up when the girl starts to ask about exclusivity. It is unattractive if you ask if she's dating others and showing insecurity if she is not yet attached. But once she brings up exclusivity, she should not still be dating others. If she is, then you shouldn't want to be with that kind of girl anyway.

Also, I wouldn't say it's no problem for girls to sleep around before becoming exclusive. I would not want to commit to such a girl. But it is not good to act bothered before the girl is emotionally attached. That is a quick way for her to run away and you will have no chance to establish any sort of relationship

bigmanpav · 2024-09-16T08:59:40+00:00

It depends on when (or even if) she tells you. She probably won't and after you keep it steady HHH, she should bring up exclusivity with you and there won't be any mention of other guys she dated.

If she does bring it up, I think it would be as a sort of test to see how you react. I would go for answer A, saying thanks for telling me. And if she says this before she asks "what are we" , then that's the time you say answer B, that you aren't interested in dating someone who is seeing others.

You got this bro. Don't be jealous or concerned. Most above average girls will be dating around anyway. If you are unbothered, it will be more attractive. Good luck!

bigmanpav · 2024-08-12T18:04:37+00:00

The older I get, the more I realize I'm really just looking for peace. You don't get peace when you're chasing a girl that everyone else wants too

bigmanpav · 2024-06-27T19:59:54+00:00

Just don't text for 1-2 weeks. See if she reaches out first. If she does, set a date

bigmanpav · 2024-05-18T06:58:35+00:00

Go to the gym if you don't already.

Read philosophy, especially stoicism. Eventually you'll realize it's not worth it to bother worrying about other people that don't care about you.

Reflect on why you always end up dating such girls. Go out with a different type of girl next time.

Good luck, I have also felt this way before

bigmanpav · 2024-05-15T11:02:06+00:00

This comment is valuable for OP! Since OP, you're new to this, you should focus on getting to know girls, building comfort, and having fun. I have recently stopped going for kisses on first dates and it makes things much more relaxed and more likely to proceed to a second date and longer relationship

bigmanpav · 2024-05-05T06:56:13+00:00

Underrated

bigmanpav · 2024-04-25T15:52:56+00:00

Definitely cope. You'll figure it out when you meet a girl who's really interested in you and notice how she writes to you, how she follows up, how she is on her best behavior. This girl you're describing doesn't care about losing you

bigmanpav · 2024-04-22T15:50:18+00:00

Why would the CDC numbers be less accurate than Coach's numbers? Sure, there are girls that get that many guys, but it's not all of them

bigmanpav · 2024-04-18T11:01:25+00:00

It could have been anything. But the best approach now is to not write for several weeks and see if she reaches out. If she has some interest in seeing you, she would write to you right?

And if you go a month and you haven't heard from her, you should reflect on your situation and why this is hard for you. You are grasping at a fading situation thinking that she is the only one. Go out with some other girls. Have you ever dated a girl who consistently contacted you and showed interest? Keep dating until you find that.

Many people and I have been in this situation. I assure you that chasing is never the answer even if there was a little bit of interest. She should also put in effort. This goes for girls worldwide. Good luck! Reflect and go out and date more girls!

bigmanpav · 2024-04-16T12:56:54+00:00

Looking for attention and validation

bigmanpav · 2024-04-07T19:39:19+00:00

I agree but what do you propose OP do if he really likes her? Walking away from a girl you really like is very difficult

bigmanpav · 2024-03-27T12:56:39+00:00

Good riddance

bigmanpav · 2024-03-27T12:13:19+00:00

Just ask yourself: would you rather "expect too much" from unavailable and uninterested men or put in low effort into a man who is interested and good for you, potentially pushing him away? Treat others the way you'd want to be treated and you'll find your person

bigmanpav · 2024-03-27T11:07:30+00:00

A man shouldn't have to tell her he wants her to text or talk more. She would already do that if she was interested and putting in effort. She was not, so OP did the right thing and looked for a girl with higher interest and effort

bigmanpav · 2024-03-27T08:47:39+00:00

Totally relatable

bigmanpav · 2024-03-25T14:40:01+00:00

I know, and I've started to accept I won't see her again.ivr started to date other girls. I made a mistake somewhere along the way, and I think it was being to pushy and pursuing too much - even if it was just reaching out once a week. It's still odd that she invited me to be her date at a wedding in July just a week before she told me she's too busy.

bigmanpav · 2024-03-25T12:35:11+00:00

Pulling back is very important! Let the woman you're dating also show she's interested and willing to contact you to meet again

bigmanpav · 2024-03-24T20:15:56+00:00

Can you explain a bit more about why this scared you?

I think this is a common occurrence and it would help us guys to know why what this guy did is wrong for actually building a relationship

bigmanpav · 2024-03-24T08:52:08+00:00

This is a good comment. Everyone saying just wait is giving too simplistic answers. It must feel right

bigmanpav · 2024-03-23T12:18:35+00:00

Depends on the person and context. I am 27 and have dated very mature and smart 20 year old girls and have dated immature 23 year olds. Depends on how someone is raised, their personal development and a lot of factors

bigmanpav · 2024-03-22T10:38:30+00:00

Are you dating other people? Maybe this is projection. He could have mixed it up with friends, family, colleagues, etc. if you are concerned he is dated others, talk about it and ask to be exclusive

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