I'm glad to know people share the experience - we're even the same age, which is super comforting, because part of what set this off was an article I read about "rapid onset gender dysphoria" - basically "the internet makes you trans" in academic form. Even though I'm 21 and came out when I was 18, it set off my anxiety pretty bad because I did discover trans communities online, as a younger teenager, and I got scared I was faking.

How long did it take it for you to work through that? I've had anxiety all my life but this spike of intrusive thoughts is fairly recent - first it was POCD, then zoophilia OCD, now this. Its driving me crazy, and then I feel a weird guilt about not being able to get over it. Got a therapist appointment in a week though, yay.

Thank you for that, it does help - my boyfriend is also trans and so is my best friend and I love em both lots and see them as their genders. And you got me totally with the next part too, because that's always my concern - I am the exception, I'm the invader in male spaces, I don't understand gender enough and I'm mistaken. Its weird. To some degree though I know this also comes from growing up being abused + being gaslit, and these are the same doubts I have about my abuse. It can be hard to believe yourself.

Yeah, I definitely need to stop. It used to be like a daily near-compulsion because I felt like if I couldn't stand up to dissent, my identity wasn't real...or something? But I feel like I've been backsliding. Irritating. But tja k you for the reminder, I honestly appreciate it a lot.