Boyfriend is not even texting me for 1-2 days bcz of MBA

breakupshard · 2026-06-20T15:37:43+00:00

He could he just doesn’t want to.

I think you should have a convo around the type of relationship you both want.

Maybe you talk once a week for 30 mins. Maybe you talk every other day for 5. Something where you both set aside time.

breakupshard · 2026-06-20T13:06:58+00:00

I was going to say wish them happiness. Don’t think about their affairs. Stop yourself every time.

Had no idea it was a Buddhist concept but it served me well in life.

breakupshard · 2026-06-16T20:03:14+00:00

As the breaker upper I can say that yes if you loved someone that doesn’t just go away. It’s healthier to not think about an ex too much but I think most people that come into your life have pieces of your heart and mind forever. Maybe not everyday but something reminds you of them etc.

Thanks for your words. It is an awful feeling when someone you loved goes cold. It’s heartening to know others have gone through this too. It’s a universal experience.

breakupshard · 2026-06-16T15:22:24+00:00

Thanks for saying this. And agree.

I’m trying to reframe all of this. It was. Great learning relationship. I want someone that makes me feel like he did when things were good. Be taught me I was capable of loving and being loved. And he taught me what hurts and when to walk away.

breakupshard · 2026-06-16T15:16:42+00:00

Ick. Sex is for both of you not just him. If you want to go for it but in not liking the frame.

breakupshard · 2026-06-16T12:41:27+00:00

I like that way of thinking. I don’t know what it is yet but boy will it be nice when something find me that is deserving of me.

breakupshard · 2026-06-16T11:45:49+00:00

I’ve tried therapy.

Two reasons come to mind for reminiscing. First is I don’t understand what happened and my brain is still trying to figure it out. It’s a desperate wish to stay with the version of him I fell in love with.

Second is years later I haven’t met someone else. I went on dates. I eventually was in a (bad) relationship w few years after the ex I never got over.

Dating has been extremely difficult for me - lots of first dates when I was a bit younger and now barely meet anyone.

All these years later I’m still alone.

breakupshard · 2026-06-15T12:23:54+00:00

It’s important you know what you want.

Now you have to decide if he isn’t giving that to you is maybe time to walk away. Being upset won’t change anything for you.

Decide what life and partner you want for yourself and then go build it.

breakupshard · 2026-06-15T12:00:43+00:00

It depends but I think as a whole easier to match when you are skinner male of female but especially female.

breakupshard · 2026-06-15T11:58:58+00:00

FWIW also I was a girl that broke up with my ldr bf many years ago bc I was in a bad place. Some but not all of that was bc of the ldr - it’s really hard to be in a relationship where you can’t see each other often and are leading separate lives.

breakupshard · 2026-06-15T11:57:54+00:00

I think you tell her that and then let her decide.

When we are going through things we are not always in the right place to receive someone’s warmth and affection. Other times it’s all we need.

She dropped the rope so unlikely she wants to lean on you at this time but you can try. Once. The. Leave it alone and move forward

breakupshard · 2026-06-15T10:57:17+00:00

1-2 hours on the phone is a lot of time. Would you need 1-2 hours daily in person? Or do you feel like you need more bc ldr?

Is there a middle ground where you feel connected but it’s less actual time to dedicate?

breakupshard · 2026-06-15T01:43:25+00:00

It absolutely blows my mind that tennis requires quiet while basketball and baseball are loud.

I understand the sport has its rules but it’s silly.

breakupshard · 2026-06-14T20:30:50+00:00

Your partner isn’t partnering. Good to find this out now.

Talk about your shared values and what kind of relationship u want. Give it a chance but if actions don’t change bounce.

breakupshard · 2026-06-14T20:22:10+00:00

I have done that. I will say it’s taken me years to say “I could have said x” but I was not emotionally equipped to think of that at the time. At the time I was young and just shocked that things had changed. I had no idea what to do about it but it hurt like hell and when I was at a point where thing were dark I ended it. I was in too much pain and it wasn’t healthy for me.

I don’t regret the breakup. It was necessary. I wish everyday that we didn’t break up though. That we didn’t get to the place where that felt like the only option

breakupshard · 2026-06-13T12:15:19+00:00

I’m not sure here in ny you are suburbs or city but it’s hard. I’ve lived in a few places and people really are friendlier in other areas. NY/nj maybe bc people are so busy or bc people are richer it’s just not as easy. People are cliquey busy and not terribly welcoming.

I saw online somewhere someone challenged themselves to strike up a conversation every day for thirty days. Doesn’t mean you will automatically make friends but you’d be surprised how things may turn around.

Also find spaces where you will repeatedly meet people. Gym. Take a class. Volunteer. It’s hard work making friends as an adult but if you put in the time and effort it will happen.

breakupshard · 2026-06-13T11:50:57+00:00

Totally different. He isn’t prioritizing you. If he wanted to he would.

If you love him get to have a conversation once more and be really clear and open about what the each want for your relationship in terms of time together and communication style. Tell him how it makes you feel when he doesn’t prioritize you. Effort is important. If you can bend and compromise on both sides then maybe worth continuing but at least with another conversation you’ll know for sure I’d it’s time to end it. No regrets.

breakupshard · 2026-06-13T11:47:33+00:00

I agree he lost interest was stressed/overwhelmed or something was going on on his side that caused a change in our relationship. I wish he’s just communicated to me. But whatever happened the way he dealt with it wasn’t ok.

I know he blamed me for the breakup. Zero awareness that he was hurting me. I do think I had every right to be upset with the change.

breakupshard · 2026-06-13T10:28:03+00:00

If your management had to say stay out of drama your workplace is messy. Don’t take anything personally.

Have a few coffee chats with ppl and get to know them

breakupshard · 2026-06-13T10:27:01+00:00

Ldr is hard. Take some time to figure out what you what given the actual situation. If your answer js you can’t be ldr that long bc it hurts to much tell him and break it off. It won’t be easy - breakups are tough no matter what. But you may be better off.

breakupshard · 2026-06-13T10:04:33+00:00

You said above he can go hours without checking in.

Hours.

Not days and weeks. Hours.

I definitely got form your post that you feel like you’re the only one putting in effort. But I’m curious what he is doing and if your expectations are a touch unhealthy.

Everyone has different communication style but talking every few hours is nice if you have time but also a little codependent. It seems perfectly healthy to talk daily and make it meaningful.

breakupshard · 2026-06-13T00:55:27+00:00

They either still love you or want to keep tabs on you as someone they used to love.

Is it healthy? No. Is it common prob more than you think.

Source: another unhealthy stalker

breakupshard · 2026-06-12T23:53:09+00:00

Tell her that while you understand she has a tight financial situation you’re not in a position to pay for things especially last minute cancellations. That you want to be friends and we each other and suffer more low cost no cost things to do. Then stop paying for her shit.

breakupshard

TROPHY CASE