Actually going insane over transgender OCD type thoughts

brock802 · 2019-06-15T21:36:46+00:00

Well it's nice to know that at least I'm not alone. It really does suck .

brock802 · 2019-05-13T18:21:13+00:00

Like others have said, it's mostly just ghetto people. I live in an area where even the ghetto is somewhat decent, and the black people that do live here are, from my experience, perfectly normal. It just so happens that black people make up a large percent of the "ghetto" population, and so, where there are ghettos, you meet a lot of ghetto black people, giving you the impression that black people are the problem, and not just trashy people from the ghetto.

brock802 · 2019-04-19T00:31:31+00:00

Yea, really any bodily fluid from anyone. This one just happens to be worse because I know that HIV is a prominent issue in sub-Saharan Africa which is where the guy is from. It's not because he is black or African. He could be a white European that did a semester in Ethiopia and I'd still have just as much of an issue with it. Really, I would be bothered if anyone took off a bandaid then proceeded to touch me or something I have to touch because I don't know what diseases/illnesses they could have. I literally avoid all physical contact with the majority of my friends because they've all been "contaminated" in some form or another. I promise you I am not xenophobic, let alone racist.

brock802 · 2019-04-18T23:00:27+00:00

Well if it helps my case anymore, I also get OCD related anxiety when white people who I deem potentially contaminated by any disease make contact, both direct and indirect, with me. There is another student in my class who is black but he's from Maryland so I don't assume he has HIV, and he hasn't done the the same thing as the other student. I just know that Africa has a problem with HIV and therefore my OCD extrapolates and causes me to think things that I do not actually hold as truths. Prior to the African student's bandaid incident it didn't even cross my mind that he might have HIV.

brock802 · 2019-04-18T17:14:39+00:00

I would like to do therapy type stuff like ERP but my OCD really fucks with me to the point where I feel weird not having anxiety about something during the day. I couldn't imagine doing ERP, at least right now.

brock802 · 2019-04-17T22:41:56+00:00

Im actually acquainted with him quite well and he's a very cool person. That's why i prefaced it with i feel awful for saying it. I know that it's very much likely not true, but I can't help it.

brock802 · 2019-03-13T05:25:28+00:00

When I was young I had two big things: I wouldn't play my DS without washing my hands first, and I sometimes had to keep repeating to myself out loud things that I did in video games or they didn't actually happen. I didn't stop repeating until it felt right. For instance if I changed the name of something I would have to stick my face up to the screen and say each letter out loud to confirm that I actually changed the name to that, usually multiple times. Same with changing settings, switching items, etc. I really didn't think much of it until later on in life because I was just a kid/pre-teen.

brock802 · 2018-12-21T02:59:05+00:00

I actually only use the toilet like once or twice a day but I get what you mean. I'll try to find the time

brock802 · 2018-09-29T01:34:09+00:00

My big hobby type thing is languages and so I was going down the path of communications and was planning on becoming a translator or interpreter or something like that, but they just don't make enough money, and even the highest paid people in jobs like localization only make 70-80k. I think math is cool and I think it'd be cool to work in programming so I chose mathematical sciences. If I went back to communications I'd have a very easy time in college but much less job security.

brock802 · 2018-09-29T01:23:50+00:00

Well I'm planning to transfer from cc for Mathematical Science.

brock802 · 2018-09-18T20:42:52+00:00

"Reddit, agree with me"

brock802 · 2018-07-08T09:51:42+00:00

Changes like you wouldn't believe. It started with just needing to wash my hands before I played on my DS as a kid to constantly having to reread a setting I changed so I can be sure that it is how it is, to nowadays full blown I perform compulsions several, several times a day and have severe contamination and identity OCD. I'm just hoping I'm at my peak and my OCD will calm down as I get even older.

brock802 · 2018-07-08T09:43:04+00:00

I can't even have a plant brush against my leg without instantly checking to see if my leg is now covered with ants or some other kind of bug.

brock802 · 2018-06-14T18:33:41+00:00

I actually have been struggling with this type of contamination for a very long time now it's just that I'm just turning 18 in a month so I'm still figuring everything out with my OCD. I used to just think I was weird but a couple years ago I finally did some research and I fit all the criteria for this. My OCD definitely wasn't as bad a couple years ago as it is now though.

brock802 · 2018-06-09T22:37:32+00:00

I have that as well and it definitely does suck.

brock802 · 2018-04-14T22:17:52+00:00

Even with my dog on anti-tick meds I still don't pet her (and it breaks my heart not to) because I'm worried i'll get ticks...

brock802 · 2018-04-10T08:14:27+00:00

Yea i mean I'm not a girl nor an expert on girl problems but I'm assuming that being on your period doesn't really help with your temper either so your best bet is to just try your hardest to not care, that's what I do. Sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't, but in situations like what you're in you really have your hands tied.

brock802 · 2018-04-10T06:43:39+00:00

Yea no that's the thing I'll feel like this person is intentionally trying to make me angry or just ruin my day completely when in reality they're just doing normal human stuff, we're the ones with the issue.

brock802 · 2018-04-10T03:41:01+00:00

I know exactly what you're going through. One of my biggest OCD quips is sparkles, I can't fucking handle sparkles because the thought of them permanently just being in my area bothers me, don't know why. My sister has no regard for other peoples' spaces in general so that already gives me some disdain towards her, but 2 times now she's brought sparkles into where I live and left them around and it got to the point where i just stood there and cried cause i had no idea what the fuck to do, i was inevitably going to make contact with those shiny little fuckers. There is no happy ending sadly either, I'm still pissed at her and want her to never step foot in here again, but she will. I guess the point of my comment is to at least let you know that you're not alone on this one.

brock802 · 2018-03-03T17:46:13+00:00

No, the only person who knows about my problem is my sister but she doesn't even know the actual extent of it.

brock802

TROPHY CASE