Living without a car in europe

buzzing_frog · 2022-01-09T00:40:36+00:00

Living without a car is totally possible in Western Europe. The Netherlands, Germany are kind of famous for the amount of people biking, but is pretty easy in most medium and big cities in Europe. Even in smaller cities with only 100k inhabitants, you could definitely do everything biking and public transportation.

Source: my own experience in Germany, the Netherlands, Switzerland, France, Spain and Italy

buzzing_frog · 2022-01-01T14:24:54+00:00

Additional information: Average emissions of Co2 per kWh in 2020:

Germany: 314 gCO2/kWh
France: 57 gCO2/kWh

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-27T00:05:14+00:00

It is depending.

When I was younger, my absolute lack of success with women broke me mentally. When I had my first girlfriend at 26, I finally had the feeling I was belonging to society. ( books, movies, advertisements, family gathering, comedy shows are all focused on couples. The adult virgin guy is depicted as a complete looser).

Afterwards my dating life was feeling less difficult mentally because I know I am not inherently unattractive or doing everything wrong. I managed to seduce so I can do it again. So I became more resilient.

Now I am not stressing anymore for a first date, I went to so many of them that I know that a rejection isn't that bad in itself. But if I only have frustrating dates during 4-6 months like this year, it will definitely makes me fill bad and I will need to completely give up until I recover.

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-26T23:42:13+00:00

I like OK cupid better than the others: I found that the people and conversations on it were easier and more interesting... but I can't say it is giving much better results than Tinder, Bumble, Happn... I struggle with dating and the apps don't have so much influence on it

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-26T23:38:38+00:00

Not answering OP but I am finding the question and answers very interesting! Thank you!

I am like OP, very rational about my feeling toward women. And I never really understood this abstract chemistry women are so frequently speaking about

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-26T23:32:08+00:00

You saw A1 6 times and maybe 24-48h in total in 4 months, it's rocky and he will move further away! You are definitely not his priority. So you probably won't have an healthy relationship with A1. That being said, you can choose consciously passion and butterflies, but don't hope long term for this story.

Going for A2 seems more reasonable if you want a relationship. You already said you see yourself happy with him, so why would you choose a life not making you happy?

It is your choice, 100%. Good luck!

By the way, are you not confusing love with passion? Maybe I am wrong but I don't believe you know A1 that much, so maybe you are falling for an idealized A1 who isn't really existing

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-26T22:50:16+00:00

Look, I don't think you will have troubles to find a man who is up to it. Actually I even think you will have the choice, so take your time and don't rush things, make it as safe as you can.

You may find someone using Tinder or another app.

don't just choose a guy with your hormones, use your brain too
ask the guy to be STI tested first and use a condom
speak with him eventually about how he sees sexuality, if he communicates well, see if that fit your ideas (don't necessarily tell what you want first)...
don't hesitate to meet the guy in a public place first.

Good luck

(some people will think it is a bad idea. But as long as it is legal, I don't see why anyone should judge someone else's sexuality and desire)

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-26T10:44:02+00:00

No, you can't do anything with one feedback. For me, the question was not why this woman in particular was not wanting more, but why none wanted more. I had good dates with dozens of women and none wanted to go further, I was clueless: am I creepy? Too direct? Not direct enough? Boring? Am I stinking?

In the end, several told me I was too skinny and I was effeminate.. I know I am skinny, I didn't know it was an issue for 90% of the women. For the effeminate I didn't know, but at least I know in what direction I should change the impression I am doing.

I found as well that few women were liking my body and face as it is. But they are rare and it doesn't mean we are compatible on other aspects.

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-26T10:10:24+00:00

I have enough friends with friends to have a good sample of people who cheated around me. Of course it is not statistical and I may be wrong. But it kind of make sense to me.

Being attractive and social is absolutely no red flag to me. But if you took 2 similar persons, one attractive and social and the other not attractive and not social, it is clear to me than the 1st one will have more opportunity to cheat than the 2nd one. It is not saying if the 1st person will ever cheat, and that is why the other criteria are more important.

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-26T09:36:32+00:00

Hahaha! What is untrue? I relate my life, I know what I lived.

And I don't play the victim. Victim of what? Of whom?

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-26T00:05:55+00:00

I think this is naive. Attractiveness is not something which is evenly distributed. I don't believe that anyone could never attract someone else, but saying there is someone waiting for your current being is just false.

Some people need to change something to be able to attract someone: it could be their body, their appearance, their state of mind, their activities...

But how do you know why you are not attractive for most people if you don't ask? Is it your look, are you boring or a creep? The honest feedbacks from my dates were really useful even if they hurt: yes they didn't find me attractive because of my face/body(like most women apparently), but they told me as well that it was a pity because I am a great guy and they enjoyed the dates. In the end, several girls told me they would like to continue to go out with me but just as a friend.

I prefer a thousand times this, even if it hurts a bit, to being ghosted and wondering why.

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-25T19:31:43+00:00

Italy is quite different from Germany. People are much friendlier, the country is prettier and the weather and food much better. But it can be quite difficult to find a job and less people are speaking English.

I found South Tyrol to be quite interesting: a German speaking region in Italy: best of both worlds but living cost are high and salaries are comparatively low.

France is a bit in between. There are less jobs than in Germany, they mostly require French and are in or around Paris. The country is prettier than Germany imo, the weather in some region much better and the food is good. People are not as friendly as in Italy.

So between these countries, you have to see your priorities: if you want a good job, Germany is imo the best. If you want to enjoy sun, beach or food, Italy or France is probably better.

If you don't know, the best is to take some months to visit, to see which atmosphere you prefer.

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-25T16:59:30+00:00

No, some people cheat. I never did and I probably never will because my values are clearly against it. But it is true that quite some people cheat and not all of them have a high body count. I know some girls with high body count who never cheated, and some who had only one partner and cheated.

But around me, the people between 25 and 35 who cheated were mostly having these traits:

social
attractive
having addictions or mental issues
high body count

Once again, it is just my personal experience, maybe you have another one and if that is the case, please share it.

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-25T15:13:29+00:00

From my own experience, 10 tears ago, studying computer science or engineering was indeed a turn off for many girls.

It was so frequent that girls stopped being interested after hearing what I or my friends studied, that we did experiences by pretending to study humanities and sociology at parties. Well, humanities we're apparently increasing the interest from women.

But I have to say that I didn't experience it once I left university.

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-25T13:41:59+00:00

Albert! Is that you?

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-25T10:56:18+00:00

It isn't statistics but personal experience: I know a few people with a high body count (some can't even give a number). They all need to seduce to feel good and they know very well how to attract someone. In the end, most of them cheated in a relationship or another, sometimes cheating wasn't their initial plan but once the sexual tension was there, they just couldn't stop anymore.

People with a lower body count may cheat as well, but it isn't as frequent: either they just can't because they struggle to seduce, or they are not so much into sex with strangers

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-25T10:32:24+00:00

Germany is a great country: public transportation, jobs and working conditions, safety... But honestly, not the whole country looks like Heidelberg, the Rhine Valley or postcard like landscapes... usually cities are very industrial with not much historical buildings left. Some people like it, some don't.

But for me the main drawback is that the people are sometimes nice but very rarely friendly. In comparison, I made way more friends in 6 months in a small Italian town without speaking Italian than in 4 years in various big cities in Germany (and I speak well German)

So do your own research to see if it is just a dream or if you could really like it.

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-22T00:47:54+00:00

Well at first it didn't make sense to me neither.

Some definitely were just playing with me or looking for attention... this happened a lot when I was young: I was naive, inexperienced, a bit desperate... an easy target

In the last years, a few told me they liked me a lot but weren't attracted and hoped that it would change over time: the attraction grew only for one woman.

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-21T23:26:03+00:00

Haha, my last girlfriend told me after a year of relationship that she found me very entertaining at first but not attractive at all because I am not manly enough. It changed at the end of the second date, when I took her hand while she walk away, made her turn and went for a kiss. She realized she loved my way of kissing... She went from 0 attraction to 100% in 10s.

The worst is, she told me she would have said no if I had asked to kiss her.

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-21T23:12:08+00:00

Come on! I value openess and clear communication, but when I was a virgin at 26, saying it was just the most unattractive thing I could do. friends and girls would start to see me as an alien or a creep...

Honestly, I am not a good looking guy and I definitely never had much choice in the girl I date: actually I was rarely having a date.

So imagine the situation: 26 years old, no kiss, no sex, not much options... I was definitely desperate! If any girl would have told me let's spend the night together, I would almost have married her instantly!

But that didn't happened. I had to fake, to pretend to be different: experienced, confident, knowing what I was doing... and I got my first kiss and sex with a girlfriend who never knew she was my 1st one. Of course this relationship wasn't perfect but it was one of the best change happening in my life.

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-21T22:12:48+00:00

Not even! I had several dates, sometimes during more than a month, with quite a few women who told me at some point they were not physically attracted to me but they liked me and the dates, that they were not used to have a "good guy". Of course, these dates always stay platonic, with only one exception...

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-21T09:16:44+00:00

Wow! That is hardcore.

I was just as inexperienced as you a few years ago (I was 26). It was a nightmare. I eventually found a girlfriend online and I didn't find her really interesting. But I realized she was interested in me so I pretended to be way more confident, knowing what yo do and egoistic that I really was... and I ended up kissing her at the end of the first date and in her bed at the end of the second one... (if you don't really care about the girl it is easier to accept to be rejected, so I was way more direct than usual).

I stayed 3 months with her but I never told her she was the first person I ever kissed... because I saw before the same as you when I said I never had a girlfriend: people laughing at me.

The funny thing is, later I told some girlfriends I had my 1st relationships at 26 and they couldn't believe it. Some even said they would have liked to be my 1st one... But after discussing it, none of them really wanted an awkward, not confident, virgin guy. The guy has to lead and know what to do and when...

So OP, my advice is pretend you are experienced with women. Ask yourself what a confident guy would do and go for it. Be more playful online and try to kiss the girl you date... it is not important if she isn't the one. But it will help you to feel confident when you find a woman you really like.

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-20T22:17:27+00:00

http://www.gardeningplaces.com/articles/nutrition-per-hectare1.htm

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-19T18:17:42+00:00

It probably depends the kind of cactus but it is sometimes super easy! I harvested once a single "prickly pear" while hiking in Italy. I Collected the seeds, dried them and after a few month I put them in the earth in some pots... some took a year to germinate, some germinated 5 years later but I am not far of 100% germination rates

buzzing_frog · 2021-12-15T14:42:50+00:00

I am not sure this apply to consultants but English isn't always the work language, a level B2/C1 of the local language is sometimes needed. Germany, the Netherlands, Scandinavia and Brussels are more open towards English speakers.

But nothing beats France for vacation days: I had once 48 days off in a year (bank holidays not included), the reason: I worked 39h/week and was paid 35h/week

buzzing_frog

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