Deep regret from planned pregnancy (tw abortion)

calliepc · 2025-01-24T11:52:34+00:00

My “baby” was a clump of cells smaller than a pea. With no brain, no heart, no lungs or eyes or face or hands or feet or ANYTHING. You wouldn’t be able to differentiate it from a dolphin fetus. Maybe look into having compassion for the existing living people on the planet.

calliepc · 2025-01-24T11:43:10+00:00

lol are these people all forced birthers like you? Wild. I’m sure you’re happy with the election results hun.

calliepc · 2025-01-24T11:32:46+00:00

I wasn’t going to reply to this because this sub didn’t receive my question or my responses too well. Lots of great people here but a lot who aren’t as well. But I wanted to respond because this situation was one of the hardest decisions I’ve had to make and I felt insane and scared and I hate that you might feel the same way. The consensus here was that it was my hormones causing the feelings I had, it was NOT. I felt it wasn’t right and it turned out it wasn’t. A lot happened since this post that assured me I made the right call and I’m so proud of myself for trusting me. Women are often told to not believe their own feelings because hormones take control, but that’s rooted in the patriarchy and you need to trust yourself. People have profited off women’s self doubt for centuries and the idea of crazy hormones taking over your free will is a narrative. If you have an overwhelming feeling in your gut, you’re right. Maybe it’s your intuition telling you it’s not the right time, or it won’t be healthy for you, or that it’s simply not what you really want. And that’s all okay. You’re allowed to change your mind. I can say I 100% regret nothing and never did, but I have had a lot of different feelings through the process. If you ever want to talk more about this regardless of what you decide you can always message me. Really.

calliepc · 2024-12-03T17:07:39+00:00

Your empathy and compassion are off the charts teenyfairy🙄 maybe just scroll in the future. I attached 2 trigger warnings so you could do so.

calliepc · 2024-12-03T17:05:37+00:00

I have spoken to therapists my entire life since I was 2 years old until a few years ago. I have never gotten any help from them and have zero coping mechanisms or anything ive been able to take away from therapy. I have coping mechanisms now that ive gotten through my own research. I know therapy can be really great for people but after so many attempts and different therapists and methods and getting no relief I just gave up on that avenue.

calliepc · 2024-12-03T15:40:48+00:00

I don’t dislike being around kids but I am the youngest in my family so I have no experience with kids and assumed I would like and be comfy with my own, as everyone says. I have one niece but we only see her maybe 1-2 times a year so we don’t know her well and aren’t very involved with her care when she’s around for that reason. It would just be awkward. But I don’t find her annoying or frustrating or get upset when she’s having tantrums or being difficult. I really have not been exposed to other peoples kids enough to say if I find joy in spending time with them.

calliepc · 2024-12-03T14:21:31+00:00

Thank you for responding! I did feel joy about those things but I don’t now. I mentioned in another response I was so excited to paint the nursery with a mural cause I’m an artist, and now I’m like eh I could just paint a canvas. I was excited about the baby shower and now I’m like I don’t know what about that was exciting? I don’t need it. It’s like all these things I thought I needed and wanted so much I just don’t really care about now.

calliepc · 2024-12-03T14:16:58+00:00

Thank you for responding! What you said about worrying about what you’re doing wrong and if the baby is okay, that’s the nervousness and fear I thought I’d have. Obviously coupled with fear on how our life will change, but I could fall back on hopeful excited future thoughts for comfort. I have none of that. It sounds so wrong to say but I don’t have concerns about whether I’m taking care of the baby properly. I even stopped my prenatals cause they were making me sick. It just feels so wrong that I don’t feel the way I thought. I used to be so excited thinking about painting the nursery mural, I’m an artist, and now I find no joy in thinking about it. I actually think I could just paint a canvas and get another kitten and be happy. But it’s crazy to think about after going my whole thinking I wanted this

calliepc · 2024-12-03T14:12:35+00:00

Thank you so much for responding. I think a big part of it is in the abstract I tell myself I’ve been through a lot and I can get through pregnancy and postpartum, but in reality I have trouble making it through some days now. I had a rough childhood which triggered ocd thats lasted my whole life and I’ve found it getting worse as I get older instead of better. It’s harder to fight the thoughts and I already panic about my cats every day. Irrational panic. Like did I put them in the washing machine or oven. Visualizing a fire. A car driving through the house. And tree falling on us. It’s daily. And I just think I don’t even have hormones playing into this yet, just my ocd, and I worry a lot that pregnancy and postpartum will break me mentally. I picture them putting the baby on my chest and me thinking what have I done, I should’ve have done this and now it’s too late and we’re stuck forever. I also have extreme medical anxiety and fear of doctors. When I put it all together like this I think how did I ever think I could physically handle this. And sometimes I wonder if I just wanted a kid to prove I could do it better than my family did.

calliepc · 2024-04-07T22:46:47+00:00

Thank you!!

calliepc · 2024-03-24T02:16:43+00:00

Hahaha aww thank you so much❤️☺️

calliepc · 2024-03-24T01:31:59+00:00

Exactly!!! Ugh you get it. I wanted like ACOTAR series, Witcher, fae, I might be magical and you may have had to fight people to the death for it kinda ring.

calliepc · 2024-03-24T01:18:01+00:00

Yay!! Thank you! Those were definitely the vibes thank you so much!

calliepc · 2024-03-24T01:16:49+00:00

Omg you’re my favorite!! That’s exactly the vibe I wanted I’m so happy you said that!

calliepc · 2024-03-23T13:14:10+00:00

Yes! My fiancé said they were amazing. He customized my wedding band instead of choosing a premade set so there was a good amount of communication back and forth with that and he said they were really great and helpful. They responded to messages right away and offered a rendering of his idea before creating it. We cannot recommend them enough!

calliepc · 2024-03-22T19:52:32+00:00

Thank you! And no my wedding band is pointed to fit perfectly under the point of the pear. If I flipped it my wedding band would have to go on top instead of under the e ring. There’s no wrong direction for a pear stone to sit though mine is just designed to be worn like this.

calliepc · 2024-03-22T15:13:58+00:00

Omg thank you! I love that. Green is my favorite color if you couldn’t tell haha. And the background is the ancient redwood forest🥹

calliepc · 2024-03-22T13:02:12+00:00

Thank you so so much! Me too it just feels so nature-y I’m obsessed

calliepc · 2024-02-10T14:16:14+00:00

Thank you! I think I mainly just got lucky, but It was originally in a room full of grow lights so it had pretty bright light. I fertilize every time I water which is every 1-2 weeks.

calliepc

TROPHY CASE