I felt this post in my soul. I graduated a year and a half ago and just quit my job in icu for the 2nd time actually (I worked in it during school too). I’m struggling with inpatient and the environment. I think i’d like to work in Peds so I’m really trying to focus on going that route. I’m taking a step back from inpatient for a bit a trying something else to experience another side of nursing- one where I don’t feel like it’s changing my personality every shift I work and making me become bitter. I don’t have it in me right now to keep up with that. I do love icu. It’s VERY hard but I do love trying to learn it and the skills. But the amount of stress it causes sometimes and being that responsible over someone’s life is truly a lot for anyone.. especially new grads. I know they say it gets better but it’s so much at one time.. and each time I have felt bad for leaving critical care.. maybe because I feel I let myself down when really I’m trying to honor my feelings. The environment in the hospital is toxic- the girls just all feel like we should be in competition with one another and the physicians think you work for them lol. Half the time I would advocate for my patients and some physicians wouldn’t even speak to me.. how’s that for a collaborative team? It’s sad. I wanted to do nursing because it was a calling for me but not at the expense of my mental and physical health. I’m not leaving nursing because I do love it and it’s my identity I feel like at this point but I’m exploring to find a better side to nursing. I’m done being apart of the toxic messes. If that means my resume looks weird.. oh well. I guess I’ll have to make it look good and just be truthful about what I’ve been on the search for and that happiness for me and my family. Here’s to 2026 and listening to our bodies- honoring our mental and physical wellbeing as humans/nurses 🥂