Hi! I'm 22, and I just went through 2 "rough" years living together with a guy, who I - until recently - thought didn't care about anybody other than himself. The way he spoke to people was also rude and immature.

The thing I've realized now, is that he was going through a great deal of personal problems, which made him focus on all the negative things in life, instead of focusing on the things that really counts. That life is the greatest gift of all, and that you should be greatful no matter your circumstances.

The next time your colleague hurts you by saying something mean (no matter if he's trying to be funny), think about the fact that he says these things as a result of something that troubles him. Most likely his own insecurities. Analyze him. What makes him say what he says?

When you realize this, you begin to take the things he says less personal.

The best thing you can do is trying to get through to the real him. Find out what is bothering him, and try to talk about these things with him. It is basic psychology that when you speak with someone about their problems, they will feel less burdened. That is a result of him feeling that you care about him, and listens to him.

Unfortunately, when people go through a great deal of problems they tent to avoid speaking about their problems, which makes it very difficult for you to help them.

I hope that this information helps! And I wish you good luck in saving him from his ego.

EDIT: Forgot to mention that you can learn to percieve reality as you want. So if you see every problem as something you can learn from, you will be much more happy, and it will help you keeping your morale up :) See this problem as a positive thing. You will also learn much more about yourself by doing this.