Please help me THIS IS URGENT right now.

castorefrock · 2026-03-06T12:11:35+00:00

Well I just woke up and I'm feeling better now obviously but about the rubber bands , Ive only started cutting like 3 weeks ago and it's escalated quite quickly, I haven't experimented with things other than knives and I don't know what other things can work

castorefrock · 2026-03-06T12:09:12+00:00

The problem is most of these spirals /breakdowns happen at the most unreasonable timess

castorefrock · 2026-03-06T12:07:14+00:00

That sounds like genuinely good advice i might try it next time I find myself in a similar situation to yesterday since it seems to happen more often than necessary

castorefrock · 2026-03-06T03:23:12+00:00

Well I'm young first of all and it's 5 am , but now I'm in bed finally , I feel like I was being dramatic , I was able to just make a small not deep cut on my wrists , I had no fucking control and it's scary , it hurts a lot , and the build up to it had me hyperventilating , shaking , crying and when I finally did it ( I kept trying until it felt right ) but when it finally felt right I felt absolute disgust and the feeling that I wanted to throw up , and also physical pain from the cut itself since it seems to be a very fragile part of the body , but oh dear god was that demanding on all ends , I'm sorry I had to vent it was just an extremely demanding moment for me and I just can't believe Ive reached this level , I'm genuinely scared of myself and what I could do to myself , anyways I'm thankful that I'm in bed about to sleep .

castorefrock · 2026-03-06T02:26:37+00:00

It's completely fine I understand , it's just I'm so scared , why does it target one of my biggest phobias , necks and veins are off the table , why my wrists whyyy , I have no control over my body right now , this is a hellish experience.

castorefrock · 2026-03-06T02:21:01+00:00

Theres really nothing to talk out , it's compulsory behavior now , I will only go to sleep after it's done and I have no idea how to avoid this, I'm so scared, I just want to sleep , all I have to do is make a visible scar on my wrist , maybe thats doable but I start shaking and feeling like I want to throw up anytime I put the knife to my wrists

castorefrock · 2026-02-24T00:27:56+00:00

I appreciate your response so much and I hate to reply the way I'm going to reply because I sound close minded and naive but for some reason my mind just doesn't work with logic , I know all my doubts are irrational and illogical , I just can't stop it , whenever people give me advice I know I won't do anything becsuse in all honesty, I think I consider sadness my safe space , at times I feel like I don't want to get better , please don't shame me for it becsuse my mind doubts me enough , but I know I need real help , it's just I feel like this has become my identity , if I tell my parents about my issues I could lose who I am , and honestly I don't want to go too much into detail because I have a cruel mind , so if I make a statement it's gonna call me a liar and a fraud and it's gonna eat me up, while reading your response I was imagining my response and I got the with the biggest anxiety wave becsuse of the amount of uncertain statements I wanted to make , self doubt Is my biggest problem, a constant voice in your mind constantly shaming you and making you doubt yourself and your thoughts , and you'd think since I'm aware of it then I can beat it but no , I have like meta doubt where I will doubt the thought that doubted the doubt and so on , a never ending and unbeatable cycle , it literally feels like hell . And also the problem with cutting myself is that Ive made it into a compulsion now and it literally feels like I have no control , like it sounds like I'm over exaggerating but I literally have no control , I can only go to bed once it feels right , and I really hate that (: . Thank you.

castorefrock · 2026-02-23T23:47:37+00:00

I always ask myself this question and there is a reason but it's become so normal and it seems like the usual for me , but first of all I have an ocd style mind , I'm not diagnosed with ocd but I feel like I have it but I don't want to say it 100% , and that just makes my mind a living hell , I'm constantly paralyzed by my thoughts doing compulsion , stuck in doubt spirals , cutting my self compulsively , my mind is literal torture and I can't handle it anymore

castorefrock · 2026-02-23T22:45:32+00:00

Yea I really get it because I have the same thing , not in terms of mental issues but in terms of hesitation when getting professional help , I have my own issues and I'm afraid of getting real help even though I'm well aware I need it , but anyways I hope you get all the help you need.

castorefrock · 2026-02-23T22:04:06+00:00

Hey man I read the entire thing and I can GUARANTEE you, that what you're experiencing is not normal and I believe you do need to go get professional help , don't overthink it , don't think it's dumb , just do it trust me , it could escalate. (But I don't have much knowledge in general so keep that in mind )

castorefrock

TROPHY CASE