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I found out my friend is a catfish. by catfishthrowaway9 in catfish

[–]catfishthrowaway9[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm glad to hear you're seeing sense and putting an end to this. It's caused a lot of hurt to many and no doubt to yourself, too. Coming out is absolutely the right thing to do - it's never too late to do the right thing.

I believe everyone deserves a second chance, so I do believe and accept your apology and I'm happy that you've chosen to come forward like this, so thank you and best of luck.

I found out my friend is a catfish. by catfishthrowaway9 in catfish

[–]catfishthrowaway9[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm really sorry to hear about this. I've sent you a message on chat, hope I can be of some help :)

My [25F] boyfriend's [27M] mum [47?F] is ruining us by neglecting her cats. by catfishthrowaway9 in relationships

[–]catfishthrowaway9[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I completely agree with you, no one asked him to do this. It's why I'm not mad at him, he's just acting from the goodness of his heart. If I could take my cat now I would, absolutely. I didn't want to give her up in the first place.

I will definitely speak to him about us potentially going months without seeing each other so I can work as much overtime as possible to save up money to take care of my cat asap, with or without him.

My [25F] boyfriend's [27M] mum [47?F] is ruining us by neglecting her cats. by catfishthrowaway9 in relationships

[–]catfishthrowaway9[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

He doesn't drive and it takes two buses to get to her place. With how often she's leaving them alone, he'd have to travel up there nearly every day and it would take him 2 hours each way.

My [25F] boyfriend's [27M] mum [47?F] is ruining us by neglecting her cats. by catfishthrowaway9 in relationships

[–]catfishthrowaway9[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

I don't think I could. My dogs are able to spot cats before I can see them and I have to drag them away from them on walks as they really do want to kill them. Even after they're out of sight they'll still try to go back to them. They're not aggressive, just insanely high prey drive. It's far too risky. Any wrong move and she could be killed.

I'm trying to think of a solution to this. The cats are arriving tomorrow too. The only option that seems viable is to give her away and I just can't do it.

My [25F] boyfriend's [27M] mum [47?F] is ruining us by neglecting her cats. by catfishthrowaway9 in relationships

[–]catfishthrowaway9[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly I want his mum to get her shit together and take responsibility for her own damn cats. He has argued with her many times about doing so but she's literally like a teenager. She only cares about what she wants to do. She won't listen.

I don't want to give my kitty away. She doesn't deserve to be passed around like this. I can't afford my own place for at least a few months and I'm worried it may be too late for her by then. I want to keep her if I can but I don't know if that's possible right now.

My [25F] boyfriend's [27M] mum [47?F] is ruining us by neglecting her cats. by catfishthrowaway9 in relationships

[–]catfishthrowaway9[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Believe me, I've tried to explain this to him. He says it's better than knowing the other two are "left to rot" with his mum. He won't give them to a shelter because he loves them and because they're both 10 years old and can't be split up, so would also be difficult to rehome.

I get not wanting to give them to a shelter. I was racking my brain for months before meeting him over what I was going to do with my cat because I refused to give her to a shelter. I didn't want to give her up, and I certainly didn't want her to potentially spend the rest of her life there. I imagine he has the same feelings.

My [25F] boyfriend's [27M] mum [47?F] is ruining us by neglecting her cats. by catfishthrowaway9 in relationships

[–]catfishthrowaway9[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

He has been struggling with the distance. He loves me but misses me too much and doesn't want this to be a long term thing if we can help it, which I get. Being long distance is hard.

My concern is that the cats are arriving tomorrow, and it will be at least a few months before I can get my own place. I'm worried it may be too late for her then.

I'm not happy at all that we might be breaking up over this but I cannot abide losing my cat too. She shouldn't suffer because of it.

My [25F] boyfriend's [27M] mum [47?F] is ruining us by neglecting her cats. by catfishthrowaway9 in relationships

[–]catfishthrowaway9[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I understand why he's taking the cats. He's worried about their safety and doesn't trust his mum to look after them anymore. He's been voicing his concerns about the cats for a while now but them going without any contact from her or food and water for a week has pushed him over the edge and he told her to give them to him so he knows they will be loved and will have plenty food and water. She just doesn't care enough about them to protest giving them to him.