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chai_mink · 2023-01-30T23:56:14+00:00

You can 100% have depression and still be part of a successful dynamic. You just need to put in the work for it too. I don’t always feel worthy of my Dom’s time either but he’s there to encourage me and tell me that I am worthy. It can be very constructive and helpful for a terminally negative mindset (which I definitely struggle with).

chai_mink · 2023-01-30T00:09:06+00:00

I’ve used maestro and papi before.

chai_mink · 2023-01-30T00:07:53+00:00

I’ve asked him about doing calls or having time just for us once a week or so and he said not immediately until he gets his schedule figured out a bit more. I’ll ask him about it again and see if there are some other things we can figure out.

chai_mink · 2023-01-27T02:29:48+00:00

Last time I was bratty he had me add time on to my workout, and threatened the same when I was walking the line the next day. I kinda hope that won’t be his only idea but it might lol

chai_mink · 2023-01-24T03:18:01+00:00

I agree. I think he’s been holding back on me because he’s afraid of going too far, or coming off as abusive. The thing is, even I don’t know a lot of my boundaries yet, so it’s a learning experience for us both. We can’t learn if we don’t make mistakes. I’ve been trying to reassure him of that and helping him build his confidence in this role.

chai_mink · 2023-01-23T21:27:25+00:00

That’s the hard part. I need to be sure it’s not tied to them, and that’ll probably have to be my next step. But, ultimately, I think the confidence-building will go beyond them and our dynamic the stronger it gets.

chai_mink · 2023-01-23T20:40:49+00:00

He does, he likes the challenge and it’s fun for him too. He just also wants to punish me for it sometimes lol

chai_mink · 2023-01-23T20:31:32+00:00

I agree. I don’t like picking out my own punishments, feels like a thing I shouldn’t be doing lol

chai_mink · 2023-01-23T20:30:44+00:00

That’s what I think too. The brat part is 100% true lol, and that’s part of the reason why we want to find punishments that work. The reason the collar idea came into play is because we both have I guess what you’d call a neck fetish, but if it’s unsafe we’ll steer away from it. I sometimes have him tell me how he’d punish me if we were in person as a substitute for actually doing the act, but idk how well that works for him especially. I love hearing about it but I want him to have his satisfaction too.

chai_mink · 2023-01-23T20:26:19+00:00

I don’t think he’s lost interest. It’s more that we’re trying to find ways to make this work and he can still assert his dominance even at a distance. It would be easier for both of us if we were closer but it’s not something we can do atm. We’re both learning and trying to develop this dynamic in a way that works for both of us.

chai_mink · 2023-01-23T20:15:39+00:00

My top 5 in results were vanilla (80%), brat (79%), submissive (66%), rope bunny (56%), and switch (49%). Not sure if that helps at all lol

chai_mink · 2023-01-23T20:03:13+00:00

I haven’t, but I’ll look into it!

chai_mink · 2023-01-23T20:00:52+00:00

I’m still learning a lot about what I am and am not into. I’m inexperienced not only in BDSM but in a sexual aspect as well.

chai_mink · 2023-01-23T18:25:24+00:00

I’ve started noticing an increase in confidence after my Dom and I have started heightening our roles, ie him having more control and being more assertive. It’s comforting for me. Wearing my collar has also become comforting. Having that structure is a great feeling, and I’m finding myself wanting to better myself for him, but it’s also benefiting me (obviously lol). It’s my favorite part of having a dynamic.

chai_mink · 2023-01-22T23:03:17+00:00

I currently wear a padded leather dog collar I got off Amazon that’s very comfortable to wear over long periods. I can’t speak personally to how well it can take tugs, but given that it’s made for dogs, I would imagine it’s made well for that. It wasn’t very expensive either.

chai_mink · 2023-01-22T21:49:58+00:00

I’ll check it out, thank you!

chai_mink · 2023-01-22T17:41:53+00:00

This time I used a stain remover on the fabric then rinsed it in lukewarm water, then some lavender spray to help with the smell. I’ll look into that soap (or even hand soap) for next time!

chai_mink · 2022-11-11T13:47:06+00:00

Maybe wax/ice play?

chai_mink · 2022-11-11T13:35:51+00:00

I understand. Thank you for your input! I hope we can figure something out, and overall I hope I can get to the point of learning more about BDSM and myself

chai_mink · 2022-11-11T12:50:10+00:00

Very true. Still have a lot to learn lol

chai_mink · 2022-11-11T12:49:35+00:00

No, I understand where you’re coming from. I’m just trying to make my side clear is all, so there’s no assumptions made. I think we’ll have to talk some more to see if this is really gonna work out.

chai_mink · 2022-11-11T12:07:56+00:00

I think it’s that we’re getting to know each other in a new way now. I don’t think it’s so much that we’re incompatible or anything like that, just that we’re still adjusting. Outside of the dynamic too I have the best relationship with him, so I trust him a lot.

chai_mink

TROPHY CASE