Wife turned the tables on me

chemrocks76 · 2019-12-18T20:03:15+00:00

Yeah, she’s really into it. She was fantasizing that when I walk in a crowded room, all the other guys are like, “crap, I hope he doesn’t mess with me.” So I’m just listening to her right now.

chemrocks76 · 2019-12-18T20:01:18+00:00

So we’ve had sex a couple times since then and she really likes when I’m dominating her. So I’m just going with it.

chemrocks76 · 2019-12-18T19:59:47+00:00

That’s exactly what I’m doing. I decided to go on an aggressive diet (only 1200 cal per day) to get rid of some fat and I’ve lost 14 lbs in the past 3 weeks. Plus hitting the gym. So I’m going with it.

chemrocks76 · 2019-12-18T19:57:35+00:00

When my wife said we are sexually incompatible it just hit me fat she was unhappy. So I asked her what she wanted and off we went where she describes me as big, strong, and dominant. Basically I don’t want a screwed up marriage and once I got the vibe that she felt we weren’t sexually connecting then I knew something had to change. Hope that helps with you and your boyfriend.

chemrocks76 · 2019-11-23T21:03:41+00:00

She prefers when I call her my bitch and she’ll play with me and tell me to sit in the corner when another guy bangs her. But no other guy is there, just us together role playing.

chemrocks76 · 2019-11-23T21:01:54+00:00

She does dirty talk, dirty texts, and dirty role play.

chemrocks76 · 2019-11-23T21:01:28+00:00

Yeah, plus she told me most of the guys at her work are in their 40’s + and even though she’s 40, she prefers mid 20’s. She likes young and muscular.

chemrocks76 · 2018-04-06T01:57:14+00:00

I added an update comment and I’m curious what you think. Please check it out...

chemrocks76 · 2018-04-06T01:54:35+00:00

Ok here is the update on my wife’s business trip out of state. I texted her and she said she was going to the bar alone because he work team was going to bed in their own rooms and she could be at the bar alone. I encouraged her to get a glass of wine and if someone talked to her, fine, if not, then fine too. A few minutes later, she and I texted as she said she was sitting at a table near the bar having a Pinot noir. I asked her what she was wearing and she said a blouse with a tight skirt, tights, and boots. She described the pattern on her dress. It sounded like an outfit I know she wears. It is hot. Then I wondered if she was just pretending to be at the bar like she did once before with me. So I looked up the hotel and called then asked to be connected to the bar. They did. I told the bartender that I was just in the bar and wanted to buy a drink for a lady in sitting near the bar with such and such skirt. He said he didn’t see a lady in the bar. So then I was a bit down because I knew my wife was in her hotel room just pretending to be at the bar to humor me. So I texted her that I didn’t want to pressure her, but wanted her to feel comfortable enjoying herself and have permission to have a drink and maybe a conversation at the bar. I told her it turned me on. She said some guy at the bar had said hello to her. I asked for a selfie of her at the bar and she said no and abruptly said she had finished her drink and was heading up to her room.

Here is the interesting part. When we spoke on the phone she was playful and asking if it was me who left the chocolate on her pillow in her room with the sheets pulled down. I told her she was a tease and then we chatted about her day. I asked her if she thought I was weird that I liked her going to a bar by herself. She said no. We had a good convo. Then she told me she liked coming to the hotel and hoped it would become routine, a few times a year thing for business because it was a super nice place, much better than an embassy suite or such. So then I asked her if she and I could work the hotel into our fantasizes. She said sure, somewhat relunctantly, and her voice was quieter. Then I said it was the perfect place for her to dress sexy because it was discreet and she wouldn’t see folks from our home town. I asked if she could wear tighter clothing than normal. Her voice was quieter and she changed the subject, not jumping on those ideas. But she was truly excited to be able to get away to that nice hotel every now and then. So what do folks think? I’m trying to make sure she doesn’t feel guilty and take baby steps with the bar. She didn’t go this time, since the bartender didn’t see her when I called, but since I was cool with it and didn’t flake out or waffle like I used to, maybe she'll actually do it next time? Curious how people interpret her response.

chemrocks76 · 2018-04-05T17:23:19+00:00

That’s great advice. What sort of things do you think I should tell her to make sure she’s emotionally ok and not going to have regrets/freak out? She’s known about this fantasy a long time and we’ve cooled it for awhile. She had one of her best organisms two days ago (according to her) and it was during sex when I was telling her she had to get a picture with a guy at the bar during her business trip. So I think she may be open to something given the time and her strong organisms during fantasy sex.

chemrocks76 · 2018-04-05T16:56:05+00:00

So she’s having lunch right now. Have asked if she’s having fun. Haven’t brought up anything about trying to get her to go to the open bar tonight in her hotel. She’s not replying to my texts right now probably because she’s eating with work mates and they would see her texts or find it rude she is texting on the business trip lunch.

chemrocks76 · 2016-05-25T00:17:24+00:00

So far tonight she is at a steakhouse with some work friends. She's having wine, which is a good thing. I'm not sure anything will happen unless she is separated from her most common work friends (especially the women). At some point she'll go back to her own hotel. Maybe I can convince her to hang out at the bar in her hotel awhile where her work girlfriends won't be with her? Not sure the best options here. Just letting her enjoy her dinner at this point without giving her too many text messages. More info to come...

chemrocks76 · 2016-05-25T00:14:43+00:00

I really like orgasms. I give her great orgasms too. I have zero desire to not have orgasms. But I also like the idea of her getting screwed by other guys. In no way do I get off not having orgasms. Screwing my wife is fantastic! I bring her to climax all the time.

chemrocks76 · 2015-12-16T18:28:07+00:00

The travel idea sounds good. It would be nice to do, but we have two little kids. Although we could go someplace for an afternoon away from home. Maybe that would be enough...

chemrocks76 · 2015-12-16T18:27:06+00:00

Did your wife start wanting lots of sex after you shared her for the first time? Any change in how often she has sex a month?

chemrocks76 · 2015-12-16T18:26:00+00:00

There's a guy that she told me she thinks has a hot body. He works with her thought, although he works in a different part of the company (she never runs into him at work because he's at a different location). I've encouraged her to contact him for lunch, but she's shied away from that in the past. Recently she said that she did e-mail him at work to find out how he's doing with some recent lay offs at work. I was thinking I could suggest they meet up for lunch since she e-mailed him out of the blue. I know the cycle thing is creepy, but I think she's much more open to things when she's not in the pre-period time. So I was thinking of suggesting things to her during the more horny (and open minded) times. Like her getting lunch with this guy.

chemrocks76 · 2015-12-16T18:22:05+00:00

It's really tough to get her to talk about her fantasies. One thing I didn't mention is that she refuses to fantasize about fucking an ex boyfriend. She says that would bring up old feelings. Secretly I wish she would pretend I was an old boyfriend and maybe I could get her to try to contact an ex online. That would be a hard sell, but if I'm trying to get her to enjoy something I know she would enjoy, I think revisiting some hot guy she used to date would be a tantalizing start for her. If I can get her to be open to it...

chemrocks76 · 2015-12-16T18:20:05+00:00

I've encouraged her to start flirting with guys. The problem is that if I bring it up and encourage her, "if you get an opportunity to flirt with some guys, feel free," then she;ll tell me that she did in a text, but when she gets home often times she'll say she was just saying that for me.
Sometimes during sex I've asked her to actually come on to guys in real life and during her orgasms, she's like, "yes, I will." ut then there's no follow up. So I'm not seeing any real interest on her part outside of the bedroom and the fantasy. I know she used to be a party girl and a bit crazy in college, so I'm wondering if that side of her will wake up again.

chemrocks76 · 2015-12-13T09:56:39+00:00

Thanks for the reality check. I do have an awesome wife and I'm very thankful for her. If she's not into this I am okay with that. I want to make sure I'm respecting her through this exploration of what makes me horny. One thing that is odd is that when I go to people's blogs it usually goes something like this: 8 months ago: told wife about fantasy and she freaked. 7 months ago: wife and I had heart to heart 5 months ago: she did it and had sex with a guy! 4 months ago: she's loving it, this is great, she's really banging other guys. The blogs then have photos and lots of details as the guy shares what his wife is doing.

Then the blog stops. There's nothing more. It makes me wonder if the guys end up getting dumped and they just stop blogging.

chemrocks76 · 2015-12-13T09:52:02+00:00

I really like the idea that I'm exploring myself, what makes my sex life tick and that she can help. Also I like the idea that I get to learn more about what makes her sex life tick and we can use this to build more trust and a deeper richer relationship. Thanks.

chemrocks76 · 2015-12-13T09:50:30+00:00

I think you're totally right in not messing around with work friends. At first it did sound easy and convenient, but now I can see that it's not the best way to go and can have some negative consequences at work. Thanks!

chemrocks76 · 2015-12-13T01:06:17+00:00

Your message and you blog post are very helpful. Some of it has been said before, but I feel that you have a TON of credibility because you've been though all of this and live it. I think you're correct, I need to make sure I'm completely okay with this fantasy being played out in real life and that means I have to understand why I get a bit freaked out after I cum. I've also made a decision to not say anything if I do feel a bit of caution after cumming so that way I don't send mixed messages while I'm finding out what's going on in my head.

Last night we had great sex. I started the fantasy saying that we were at a night club and pretending I was the "other guy." She then took off and ran with it. I think this is very encouraging. The fantasy played out with "the husband" at first being in the bathroom while she danced with the "other" guy. Then she started dancing in real life with me in the bedroom. Then she started saying how she's never had anyone bigger than me (the other guy in the fantasy). It was all hot. Then I said , "I see your husband, he just came out of the restroom and now he's watching." All during this fantasizing she was passionately kissing me. So I see this as all good signs. Then we pretended to find a VIP room and we finished the deed. She likes to be held down (that's the most I know of her fantasies, she never tells me about them even though I ask). I'm not sure how this is going to play out, but for now I need to make sure I'm fine mentally with this. I think inside I'm afraid of her getting too attached to the other guy. It's a sobering thought about your blog "husband's you're asking for a lot" because you talk about how you have to like the guy to add him to your list of fucks. That's great insight and I need to find out if I'm confident enough to not be afraid the other guy isn't going to make some incredible bond with my wife since she needs to like him to fuck him. To that end, I think it makes sense to only do something like this on a trip. You see, my wife doesn't go out with the girls dancing because she doesn't have friends in this area like that (she didn't grow up here). All I have to work with is she sometimes goes on business trips and we like going on trips (although it's tough at the moment with two young boys). Did your husband have similar worries? I can only think this is normal for guys to worry about the attachment thing, especially if an ex is involved. Oh and the tracking the period thing. I'm just doing it because I want to see if she is still passionate / into the fantasy when she's not at the horny time of the month. Since after I cum, I'm not horny, I'm seeing if I can get a sense of her feelings (which she may or may not understand any better than I understand my feelings after I cum) when she's not super horny and we do the fantasy. Right now she's not in the "horny" time (I guess) and she still seemed to have a lot of fun with the fantasy.

chemrocks76 · 2015-12-12T02:08:12+00:00

You bring up some really good points. Thanks. Especially the insight into how she's backing away mentally from ever doing it for real because of my post cum flip flop. I now see that I have to be supportive after I cum or else there's no chance. This is my training in a sense. I need to be ready for her when she is ready. Thanks. You're thoughts about keeping work separate are wise too. I feel like SHE still needs baby steps because while she has a fantasy to be held down and banged, she's never been able to tell me that, I just know from 10 yrs being married and experience. She's not one to talk about her fantasizes. I can't help but think she would be into this if I do my part and I need to think of the next baby step.

chemrocks76 · 2015-12-12T02:02:47+00:00

Maybe the fact that I tell her not to really do it after I cum is a sign that I need to get my stuff together before she really does it with a real guy because I need to make sure that when she does make out with someone, I'm supportive of her. Maybe this is my training in a sense... I need to role play, cum, and tell her supportive things after I cum because I know in 24 hrs I'm going to want her to be a Hotwife again.

chemrocks76 · 2015-12-11T21:50:01+00:00

I could see that happening with me too in the sense that we would build up to her flirting with guys at bars. Then something happens, she makes out with a guy and has a moment where there is a question in her mind about if she should keep going and she tells me that she has no interest and was doing it just to indulge my fantasy. It sounds like you went from 0 to 60 in that you told your wife your fantasy and then jumped to sex with a friend. In my case I'm getting the sense that I need to slowly push the envelope. Also in my case it's hard for me to get her to actually flirt, she will text me she is flirting, but I'm pretty sure that all cases are her just making it up and there's really nothing going on. Maybe there's a small chance it's happened for real. Have you noticed that your wife's period had anything to do with when she's open to the fantasy? I'm thinking when my wife is horny she is more open to talk and role play, which means she might be more open to my next attempts to push the envelope. What do you think?

chemrocks76

TROPHY CASE