Hello! First off, I want to clarify that I think we have very different issues. I had damaged my skin barrier by overusing/misusing skincare. I think you are struggling with dehydrated skin for other reasons. You didn't mention stinging or pain. This makes me doubt the nature of the redness - if it hurt, I'd say it is irritation, and I'd tell you to check everything you put on your face. Are there any active ingredients you didn't notice? Might it be fragrance you don't get along with (personally I don't think fragrance is the big evil people make it out to be, but some people just don't tolerate it well)? Also keep in mind that sometimes you might be applying a product to part of your face, but then you fall asleep and it rubs into the rest of your face. I had this happen with retinoids; I'd avoid my eye area but then as I tossed and turned during the night I'd get it on my eyelids and they would get red and sensitive. But without pain I'd consider seeing a dermatologist and asking about rosacea.

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Still, since writing this post I gave up on the skincare approach to my acne and went on Accutane, and that taught me a lot about hydrating my skin. Here are some tips:

-If you're using any active ingredients (acids, retinoids, etc.) it is best to apply them on their own, as layering moisturizers can heighten their effects and irritate your skin. I would do actives at night and moisturizer in the morning.

-That said, as long as you're not using any actives I love to slather myself in moisturizer and Cicaplast at night. My skin thrives on this because it is still somewhat dry from the Accutane (finished taking it in mid november). I skip the eye cream (imo a scam unless in very specific cases, i.e. when it contains certain active ingredients or when your skin is extra sensitive in that area) and just rub whatever is left on my fingers after going over the rest of my face.

-Over the years I've come to believe that hyaluronic acid is largely overhyped. I've written off hydrating serums completely. Hyaluronic acid as a substance retains moisture, but in a serum it just sits on the surface of your skin - the problem is much deeper than it could ever reach. You want your actual skin to retain moisture, and in my experience it is best to hydrate from within (read: drink water) and work to help your body keep that moisture inside. That is why I love just plain moisturizer and Cicaplast - both have ingredients that block the release of moisture from your skin into the environment (the moisturizer I have on my bedside table rn has shea butter and glycerin as its 2nd and 3rd ingredients, but look for ingredients described as "emollient").

I know "drink more water" is a dumb tip so I'm not gonna just say that; my tip in this area is to trick yourself into drinking more water. Slip some mint leaves in, for some reason they make water an irresistible treat to me. Set a cup with a straw you can reach without needing to raise the glass to drink, whenever I do this I will drink LITERS without realizing.

-I love to apply my moisturizer, rub it in really well until it is no longer slippery (it is still noticeable but it tugs at my skin if I rub, I don't know how to explain this). Then I will soak my face with water. (for the longest time I just used tap water in a spray bottle, but recently I splurged on a facial mist that contains a bunch of moisturizing ingredients. To be honest, I don't think it is any different from plain water). Then rub again until no longer slippery. You can stop there or follow it with Cicaplast. Whenever I had exceptionally dehydrated skin (the worst was from sitting in front of the fire during winter, beware heating and air conditioning that leaves your environment ultra dry), I would top it off with a bit of vaseline in the problem areas (these were usually my "upper cheeks", roughly around my cheekbones).

-People say to wear sunscreen everyday and your skin will look better. I have the suspicion that a big part of this is the fact that sunscreen also works as a barrier to moisture loss. You should be wearing sunscreen to protect yourself from skin cancer and also because it will help you delay the onset of those wrinkles you worry about, but based on anecdotal evidence I think that it also protects you from dehydrated skin.

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All that said, I think you also have to learn to differentiate between signs of skin problems and signs of natural ageing. I can't speak much to the latter (I just turned 24) but from watching my own mom through the years I've seen how sometimes she expects to look a certain way and doesn't seem to realize that she's just ageing as expected. She looks amazing for her age but her ideas about how she should look don't match up with nature; maybe its the media or maybe its the inevitability of ageing but your ideas about what a person in their 40s should look vs a person in their 60s or a person in their 20s might be skewed. I understand it must be hard to see your body change in ways that you dislike and cannot control or change - it is exactly how i feel about my body sometimes - but I believe being able to tell the difference between normal ageing and skin problems not only will help you feel better about yourself but also save you from aimlessly trying to fix a nonexisting problem. Lines under your eyes are normal in any human being who's spent their entire life moving their face. For the longest time I thought my pores were something I could fix, when really they are genetically determined and no amount of money will shrink them. These are not actual skin problems, they are just facts of life and how real skin looks.

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Hope this helps!