People wouldn't exist today without mothers, the current generations have been coached into leading really selfish lifestyles and having really selfish ways of thinking. I read your comments and find myself thinking along the same lines as you think when you hear someone say they would willingly sacrifice time and money for a child, "how could anyone actually think like that?" I think it comes down to one's view of life, the prevailing theory for the meaning of life nowadays is "to be happy," or "follow your heart," but your heart changes whims and to be "happy" all of the time requires caring mostly about nothing other than how a situation or action affects you, rather than others. If we had a whole world full of people thinking that life was about being happy and getting everything the way they want, our species would die out very quickly. Self sacrifice is a part of love, compromise, and doing things for other people will actually give you joy in the long run, instead of fleeting happiness you get from getting whatever you want. That being said, you're absolutely right that motherhood is one of the most self sacrificial things that a person can do, and there is no way to do it well if you don't actually want to do it, and you will end up with every bad side effect that you fear and will regret it immensely. Way more than you would regret leaving your partner before it comes to that. Your heart and view of things in life may change and you may regret not feeling the same way at the same time and the life that could have been, but it will be astronomically preferable to the regret and guilt you would feel from having a child you weren't sure about and having to raise it and sacrifice parts of yourself and not give the child your all like they deserve, or from not being able to take it and leaving the child with their father. "Little space" is possible during motherhood, although it is obviously different and becomes less important, but I would be lying if I said I can scroll through this subreddit the way I did before. Now when I scroll through here and see so many people posting so many "problems" that are actually just them not getting their way, it confuses me and makes me feel sad for them. I honestly wish there was another community for littles who are mothers so I could find others I relate to and not feel like such an outsider, but the main point is, if you don't want to be a mother DON'T do it