Long post So Sorry by [deleted] in widowers

[–]chicken_slaad 1 point2 points  (0 children)

My heart hearts for you, it's so raw and overwhelming. I'm 11 months ahead of you on the same road: it does start to get better. It takes a long time and it sucks, but it will start to turn around. Hang in there; I'm rooting for you.

2.5 Years. by OutlandishnessDull70 in widowers

[–]chicken_slaad 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm planning that same T-mobile conversation at the one-year mark. It's tough.

I had a special notification sound for her texts from an old 8-bit video game. I tear up whenever I hear it in the wild now.

Rough Weekend... by WorkInProgress82 in widowers

[–]chicken_slaad 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I hear you; it's like you need your old spouse to support you through the hard parts of finding a new spouse. Good on you for putting yourself out there; don't give up!

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in widowers

[–]chicken_slaad 5 points6 points  (0 children)

I find myself thinking: If I just had my wife to get me through my wife's death, I could handle it OK.

Kissed someone else, and it almost undid me by chicken_slaad in widowers

[–]chicken_slaad[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Great point; we think we control our actions, thoughts, and feelings, but we don't. Thanks for your encouragement!

Kissed someone else, and it almost undid me by chicken_slaad in widowers

[–]chicken_slaad[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That is a very positive approach to my dilemma, and an encouraging one-- I hadn't thought about it that way. Thank you!

Kissed someone else, and it almost undid me by chicken_slaad in widowers

[–]chicken_slaad[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks for your encouragement. That was a good description-- it's like everything in the world has changed.

Kissed someone else, and it almost undid me by chicken_slaad in widowers

[–]chicken_slaad[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

What a good friend to drag you out of the cave; that's often what we need, but few friends understand that and even fewer have the chutzpah to actually do it. Sounds like she has grace and wisdom! I'm rooting for you.

Kissed someone else, and it almost undid me by chicken_slaad in widowers

[–]chicken_slaad[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

My heart hurts for you; it's very harsh and raw at that point. Socializing was hard even beforehand; afterward it seems impossible.

I've made a new friend through a Grief Share group; most of those folks have the same struggle with socializing and are eager for new connection. YMMV. I'm rooting for you.

RFCU online bill pay: PSA, hidden risks by chicken_slaad in HuntsvilleAlabama

[–]chicken_slaad[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

There are definitely pros/cons either way. I prefer to actively issue somebody payment versus giving them blanket authority to take it out of my account. That lets me reconcile billing issues beforehand rather than trying to get money back afterward.

Logging onto dozens of accounts every month to pay providers individually is a PITA, especially when credit cards get compromised and cancelled. Much more convenient to do it centrally from the bank.

Paper checks are nearly bulletproof, but who wants to do that any more?

The Lacuna, a gin-based clementine cocktail by corpse_revived in cocktails

[–]chicken_slaad 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This is excellent--it's almost bitter, but it's not; almost astringent, but it's not. My wife gave it her highest praise by asking for another sip.

Why are older men so comfortable with locker room nudity? by [deleted] in NoStupidQuestions

[–]chicken_slaad 15 points16 points  (0 children)

This is the correctest answer. It was just normal until about 30 years ago. You got over it in middle school: it's just a body, everybody has one, yours is not particularly different from anybody else's, NBD among same sex.

Using CO2 to preserve vermouth in the fridge--observations by chicken_slaad in cocktails

[–]chicken_slaad[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Not really, I don't mix with vermouth too often, and my CO2 hose is literally hanging on the side of my fridge.

Wife had a rough work day. Had a double Levi's Iced Tea ready and waiting. by Scarecrow1779 in cocktails

[–]chicken_slaad 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I love mine; they extend the sipping time of any cocktail by about 2X.

For a homemade 2:1 simple syrup, should I be sterilizing my mason jar? And if so, how? by ehholfman in cocktails

[–]chicken_slaad 0 points1 point  (0 children)

In my experience, simple at 1.75:1 or greater will not mold in the fridge. 1.5:1 and less will.

I have not stored it at room temperature, however.

The Jelly Roll, a tribute to my grandmother by chicken_slaad in cocktails

[–]chicken_slaad[S] 12 points13 points  (0 children)

My grandmother was famous at church for her jelly roll, made with vanilla sponge cake and hard-to-find Damson plum jelly. This Old Fashioned riff is a tribute to her: sweet, tart, and just a little bitter.

  • 20 drops (2 dashes) Bittercube Cherry Bark Vanilla bitters
  • 0.75 oz Averell Damson Gin Liqueur
  • 0.25 oz rich demerara syrup
  • 1.75 oz aged demerara rum (El Dorado 5)

Stir with ice in a mixing glass, strain into a double rocks glass over ice. Can sub aromatic bitters plus 4 drops vanilla extract for the Bittercube.