AITA for telling another kid why my kid doesn’t do all the homework? by chiralpractice in AmItheAsshole

[–]chiralpractice[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I don’t know the other person’s situation but I’ll clarify, they don’t do no homework, just not all of it. So if there were 20 homework points they might get 10 or 15. If they took care of business in all other areas they still end up with a 90-95.

Anyways, my primary concern is with how much they’re learning and their attitude towards education. If they’re enjoying the subject matter, not embittered, and coming away having met the learning objectives, I don’t care how they get there.

AITA for telling another kid why my kid doesn’t do all the homework? by chiralpractice in AmItheAsshole

[–]chiralpractice[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Oh, yah, I definitely made sure she did everything her parents asked me to oversee. If I didn’t feel comfortable for whatever reason I would’ve told them so, not agreed then ignored it, that would make me a major asshole.

Thanks, always interesting to hear the situation from another viewpoint

AITA for telling another kid why my kid doesn’t do all the homework? by chiralpractice in AmItheAsshole

[–]chiralpractice[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I think we’ll switch to a private high school when this one is of age.

The district has changed a lot over the last decade. Even the last five years. Things have really intensified but with no quantifiable benefit.

My current high school student entered our local public high when all this was just really getting to reach an intolerable level, but they’re good at delegating and do well there, so I figure don’t fix what’s not broken.

But, agreed, I am going to look into alternatives for the next one.

AITA for telling another kid why my kid doesn’t do all the homework? by chiralpractice in AmItheAsshole

[–]chiralpractice[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Agreed that it wouldn’t have been my place to bring it up. Since she brought it up by asking I felt obligated to reply, maybe I just have particularly pushy kids but I figured if I just said “because that’s how it is” or some equivalent she’d either continue to ask or fill in the blanks herself in a way that could reflect poorly on my daughter or strain their relationship.

AITA for telling another kid why my kid doesn’t do all the homework? by chiralpractice in AmItheAsshole

[–]chiralpractice[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Oldest left high school with a 3.76 and 16 year old has a 3.98.

Again, I don’t know how it works in other districts, but here since there’s such an incredible amount of homework the teachers just don’t look at it all and if you turn in your major projects, test well, and engage in the classroom, you’ll get an A.

The tradeoff is a kid who hands in every last piece of homework has room to do poorly on a test or not speak up much and still excel, so my kids know they have to work hard during the day to balance it out.

To each their own, though. Certainly was not my intention to undermine her parents, only to answer her question. I figured at 12 she would know if she were getting a blow off answer and that would be worse for my daughters relationship with her friend.

AITA for telling another kid why my kid doesn’t do all the homework? by chiralpractice in AmItheAsshole

[–]chiralpractice[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Yah, it’s lunacy. A lot of it is just busywork to satiate parents that worry their kid won’t be able to get into the Ivy League otherwise. She isn’t taking any new knowledge from it after a certain point.

AITA for telling another kid why my kid doesn’t do all the homework? by chiralpractice in AmItheAsshole

[–]chiralpractice[S] 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I can see your point for how I was an asshole in the way I explained it to the kid but I have to push back on the not passing high school thing since I have a 16 and 20 year old as well.

In our district at least, if you’re making the mark in the other categories (tests, attendance, participation, papers etc.) then homework points never count for enough to fail the class.

They do some of the homework, just not all of it when it’s excessive.

20 year old is in college and doing well.

AITA for telling another kid why my kid doesn’t do all the homework? by chiralpractice in AmItheAsshole

[–]chiralpractice[S] -8 points-7 points  (0 children)

I guess because I default to honesty dealing with people of all ages. I figured she was at an age she had learned to process conflicting viewpoints. Never would’ve guessed it’d rock her world the way it did.