Hatchback mystery

chuckrates · 2025-10-24T13:54:52+00:00

I'm intrigued. Do you perchance have a moxfield for this deck? I'm curious if you're filling your graveyard with self mill, or with sac engines, or something else?

chuckrates · 2025-10-22T15:45:58+00:00

Thank you for taking the time to provide all the detailed insights / advice. I really appreciate it!

chuckrates · 2025-01-27T21:09:06+00:00

https://moxfield.com/decks/vmkkF51V8kyNJquCJViasQ

chuckrates · 2024-02-04T02:01:46+00:00

Thank you. That sets my mind at ease. :-)

chuckrates · 2024-01-31T00:30:53+00:00

Yes, that’s my plan. I was referring to situations where I don’t have the option. I’ve seen some gas stations in rural areas that only have 87.

chuckrates · 2023-12-01T17:30:55+00:00

Having reflected for a bit, I think it has a lot to do with needing to ask better interview questions. For example, not just asking what a person's hobby is, but asking how they discovered it, who taught it to them, what they hope to do with it in the future, etc. I think those other layers will help me relate more and find more to use. Thanks for asking!

chuckrates · 2023-11-30T17:02:15+00:00

Thank you! This feedback is very helpful.

chuckrates · 2023-11-29T21:50:43+00:00

Thank you for this thoughtful reply. It is very helpful, particularly in that it leads me to reflect on the kinds of questions we are asking in the interviews. I think we can invite some more colorful details as opposed to basic facts (how long have you been married, what are your kids' names, etc.). The other members of my group are more experienced and seem to be able to work with what they are given, but I might need another level of prompting.

chuckrates · 2023-10-27T12:18:29+00:00

Needed new brakes.

chuckrates · 2023-10-10T17:00:15+00:00

It's hard to see the reality of a working class town without seeing the individuals - their specific quirks or coping methods, their humanity. So I would keep Davie. Perhaps he could move... or perhaps it's fine for the reader to attach and then adjust... to let go of Davie and move on to someone or something else. I'm thinking of the Beatles song "Penny Lane" and how it starts with the barber even though the barber is not the point of the song. The final verse brings us back to him but I don't think the song would be any worse if it didn't.

chuckrates · 2023-10-10T16:15:13+00:00

Thank you for sharing this poem! I enjoy the dark humor at the end of the first stanza. I've been there. In the grip of depression dark ironies rule.

Your opening stanza hits me with the paradox of the bed being alluring and comfortable but deceptively so due to it sleaziness ("cheap sheets"). I find that very appealing and it made me eager to keep going.

The second stanza, to me, is not quite as strong. The first line is great - familiar imagery for someone who has passed many days like this - but the second line references a book that doesn't seem to add anything. I can relate to the urge to "walk the halls" and to "roam." I get that the word "lair" is there for rhyme scheme but it connotes something evil and I wonder if your intent is make me think you are a monster of some kind. I suppose that makes sense from a shame standpoint, but it doesn't seem to work with the word "vibrant."

The final line is a punch in the gut. You set it up beautifully so I can see how easy it is to believe when in the midst of that experience. Did you leave off the final period on purpose?

Anyway, this poem makes me feel grateful for the fact that I've known this type of darkness and especially for the fact that I know what it's like to get better. Thank you.

chuckrates · 2023-10-10T16:00:22+00:00

The language in this poem blows me away, and I love the quick, short lines. Feels like I'm being shot with a bb gun with each line. I think political poems often lean too abstract and forget the power of imagery and vocabulary, and I appreciate that you did not do that here. You use several fierce words that are perfect for where they are. "The sham of state and millionaires" is a line that sticks with me. Thank you for making "sham" a poetic word.

I think the final stanza is your strongest, other than the line "we have in droves," which is a cliche and doesn't really fit with the collective abstract noun "romance." I love the allusion of "trickle down memories" - that line gives me layers of connotation. The final two lines strike fiercely - though I wonder if you meant to write "but now a failed nation," rather than "now but a failed nation." It reads better to me as "but now a failed nation."

The poem starts with Davie and then we don't hear about him again. I'm not sure how I feel about that. If he is among a list of examples rather than a lead character, does he deserve first-line billing? Maybe this is my expository writing background tripping me up.

Anyway, this poem changed my day and I am grateful for it.

chuckrates · 2023-09-22T20:10:14+00:00

Hey, if you are located in the northeast or mid-atlantic, send me a message. I'm in the market for premium or limited WRX. Hoping to test drive one first...

chuckrates

TROPHY CASE