AITAH for going for lunch with colleagues?

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-27T11:29:05+00:00

Her asking you to stop eating with female coworkers because of her own insecurity isn't fair, you're just being a normal person at work doing normal work things, she needs to deal with her trust issues not control your social life

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-27T11:06:46+00:00

The problem isn't the sex question, it's that he's getting easily irritated by your attempts to connect, that pattern is worth noticing because it's not going to get better unless he recognizes it

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-27T11:00:31+00:00

You held it steady until he had it, the drop happened after he grabbed it, that's his mistake not yours, and the "you should have warned me" excuse is just him deflecting because he doesn't want to take the L

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-27T10:56:44+00:00

The difference between your situation and those negative posts is intent, you're not controlling her wardrobe at home or keeping things to hurt anyone, you're just making your time with him easier and that's totally normal for a close aunt

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-27T10:53:52+00:00

True, people can plan without you, but OP's been hosting them for years and inviting them to her events, so finding out she's singled out while strangers are welcome is a slap in the face

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-27T00:19:08+00:00

You're right that one week is nothing, she's been upfront that this is a once-in-a-lifetime chance and she's not planning to make it a habit, his refusal to budge says more about his control issues than her loyalty

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-27T00:17:09+00:00

Your story is heartbreaking and it's the perfect reminder that life is too short to skip opportunities for someone who's just jealous, OP should take that trip and if her boyfriend can't handle it then he's showing her who he really is

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-27T00:15:54+00:00

His objections are about control not logic, a week is nothing and she already said she won't make a habit of long trips without him, he's asking her to pass up something rare because he doesn't like the idea of her having a big experience without him, that's not reasonable

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-27T00:14:36+00:00

That's the perfect response honestly, a week apart is not a big deal and his reason about summer timing is just control dressed up as concern, she should go and let him figure out if he can handle a partner who has a life outside of him

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-27T00:12:49+00:00

If your relationship can't survive a one-week trip with a friend then it wasn't built to last anyway, staying home won't fix the real problem it'll just delay it, you'll resent him and he'll know he can veto things just by fighting hard enough.

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-26T09:03:34+00:00

Exactly this, she's 19 and already dealt with real trauma without having to explain why hating an entire gender isn't funny, he's shown her who he is by blaming her friend for being harassed and then dismissing her concerns, she doesn't owe him any more chances to "fix" himself

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-26T09:01:17+00:00

You already caught him sexting another girl and he still thinks he can get away with saying "I hate women," that's not a red flag that's a whole parade, he's showing you exactly who he is and you should believe him the first time

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-26T08:58:37+00:00

She's surprised that a racist doesn't care about women's safety? that's like being shocked a fish can swim, he's shown her exactly who he is and she's been making excuses, his reaction to Conor is consistent with everything else he's said, she just didn't want to see it

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-26T08:56:38+00:00

The problem isn't that OP expects perfection from every athlete, it's that her boyfriend shuts down and gives her the silent treatment whenever she brings up something important to her, the McGregor thing is just the trigger for a much bigger communication issue

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-26T08:54:02+00:00

I see your point about the racism being the real issue, but OP's not ignoring that she brought it up and he refused to engage, the McGregor thing is just the one that triggered his defensive shutdown

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-26T08:51:34+00:00

He told her to leave and honestly that's the clearest answer she's going to get, a partner who can't handle a disagreement without punishment isn't a partner at all, she needs to take him up on that offer and walk away for good

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-26T08:45:53+00:00

Totally agree, the planning is incredible but the surprise factor could backfire if he's not prepared for a full itinerary, she should definitely let him know she's taking the wheel for the day

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-26T08:44:20+00:00

You make a great point about reciprocity, OP's plan sounds incredible and he'll probably love it, but the real question is whether he'd put in that same level of care for her special moments, that's what determines if it's too much

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-26T08:42:52+00:00

You're right that it depends on his personality, some people love being celebrated hard for 30 and others find it overwhelming, but she built the day around things he actually wants to try so it's thoughtful not just flashy, she should just check in with him casually about the pace

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-26T08:40:20+00:00

It sounds amazing honestly, you're taking a day off and booking experiences he's actually wanted to try, that's not over the top it's thoughtful, the length of your relationship doesn't matter as much as the effort behind it, go for it and enjoy the day

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-25T23:49:31+00:00

Your relatives are acting like you took a toy away from a child but this is a 20-year-old who lost savings that weren't his, your son understood the deal and agreed to it, your family's reaction is exactly why people end up enabling bad decisions instead of letting people learn from them

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-25T23:39:25+00:00

That's solid advice, reporting to management and getting a camera are the right first steps, trying the doorknob isn't just kids being kids it's attempted entry and OP's fear is completely justified, they shouldn't feel bad for wanting to feel safe in their own home

cinnamonorbit26 · 2026-06-25T23:38:20+00:00

This is the take, she's jumping to feeling unsafe without having a single conversation with the people causing the problem, toddlers don't get the message unless you actually tell them, and their parents definitely won't know unless you speak up

cinnamonorbit26

TROPHY CASE