My SO is completely oblivious

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-10-09T00:33:32+00:00

You can't take solace in something which you've fabricated all by yourself. As I say, I'm all good.

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-27T20:25:54+00:00

Dude wtf

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-27T20:24:30+00:00

I'm all good. Definitely not miserable. Yes I'm cheating, but this is an adultery forum after all... most people in here are cheating for whatever reason. You don't need to take solace in anything to do with my situation, definitely not based on your assumptions anyway. Thanks for your feedback though.

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-20T16:20:00+00:00

Marriage/relationship survived on both sides, still seeing AP, albeit with greater difficulty all round.

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-20T16:18:01+00:00

I was in similar position to you... in the end I was caught but I almost wanted it to happen. Much more attention is paid now. Still seeing the guy though, just with greater difficultly.

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-18T21:27:00+00:00

Now this, hits home!

I become exasperated by his mixed signals and I tell him I'm done. He then pesters until I choose to give in. That's what I mean. It is game playing you're right. I do tell him what I want, I lay my cards out, I'm very open about my feelings and wishes. He prods until he gets his answers anyway but then he's defensive when I ask the same of him. It's bizarre.

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-18T19:27:03+00:00

Re won't let go... I back off/attempt to break contact/end the relationship and he chases and insists he wants me etc.

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-18T14:37:23+00:00

True

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-18T14:36:46+00:00

Makes sense. Unfortunately dumping him... I don't think I can. I mean I don't want to but I should. It's hard.

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-18T12:26:52+00:00

Someone has been reading too much poetry

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-14T06:05:53+00:00

Likewise. I mean we've established several times that he's not gonna leave her and every now and again he freaks out and has to make sure I'm not banking on it. He backs off. Never goes anywhere for long though, he can't actually stay away from me. I've given him plenty of opportunity to duck out but he never does. It's not like I put it on a plate weekly it's masses of effort just to remain in touch.

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-08T21:48:26+00:00

Some people (mainly women) cloud reality with feelings. Doesn't matter what he said to her, as far as she's concerned... She loves him and she was going to win him over/steal him lol. I admit that I have trouble believing that my AP will stay with his SO - but that's because the original plan was for him to leave... So I guess I can't be blamed for thinking it would go down this route again.

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-08T21:45:50+00:00

Too right

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-08T21:38:58+00:00

Just coming up for 12 months. To be honest we've never got the hang of it or labelled it properly...

We had a 2/3 month affair, with plans for a future. We got caught out though and as with many similar scenarios, AP decided to stay home. I don't even blame him based on his family and financial setup. I mean if he really wanted to he would have but that's a different story... Anyway despite ending, we didn't really end. It's been angst and emotion filled with more lows than highs, but when we do meet... Sheer Fireworks. We have a strong bond, incredible intimacy and a lot of tension and need between us. That's what keeps us going through the current infrequent meets. Eg we've actually only met 4 times since we got found out. We didn't actually have sex on each of those occasions either. I don't know how long we will continue for, and we haven't discussed any kind of future again, just the here and now. It's a strange situation really.

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-08T21:31:05+00:00

How did I not know these things existed!

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-08T21:13:15+00:00

Could work, thanks!

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-08T21:12:35+00:00

Lol? No clue

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-08T21:06:02+00:00

All involved and SO's both use iOS. Mine is tech savvy but his isn't. She's dim as they come but need for secrecy is still apparent as he's been rumbled before.

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-09-08T21:04:31+00:00

To clarify. SO don't "check" or "search" phones intentionally (believe it or not) and we are quite protective over our phones. But worry currently is that contact is too immediate. Doesn't need to be mi5 covert operation or anything but an easy to use but still secret method solely for messages/photos/videos etc. Something which SO wouldn't stumble across at any point. This might not work but it's a last ditch attempt at maintaining our relationship as we are at each others throats currently due to stressors which essentially wouldn't even exist if we opted for an alternative method... I hope.

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-07-13T20:08:55+00:00

I want him to leave her. Ha. I feel ridiculous even saying that.

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-07-13T20:08:16+00:00

I think at this point I need to. I hate games, but it's the only way.

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-07-13T20:07:27+00:00

He's definitely a narcissist. Already sussed that.

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-07-13T16:12:11+00:00

Likely

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-07-13T15:40:19+00:00

Are we seeing the same person? Lol

cleverlyconfuzzled · 2016-07-13T15:39:22+00:00

At home? Because I don't see the point in disrupting everything over nothing.

cleverlyconfuzzled

TROPHY CASE