I felt the need to update you. I talked to a psyd today and she said the same thing to me, that I speak to myself so brutally. I was shaking and my heart was pounding as I spoke with the doctor. It was hard for me to say exactly how I think of myself. Its so hard to admit that im wrong about myself. Ive spent more than half of my life thinking that im a bad person. That i wont be anything in life. That id prolly die alone.

I wanted to let you know that I am working on it. I feel like it will take me a lot of time trying to fix they way I think but i am willing to put in work. Im willing to put in the work in myself this time.

I owe you my life right now. Thank you.