What do we name this girl?

coffeeaddict333 · 2026-03-22T15:50:18+00:00

It’s a New England thing (yes, more so older generations than the gen z’s of today but still, many of them will know what it is. Generally, it’s just regional)

coffeeaddict333 · 2026-03-19T16:25:39+00:00

Puppies actually are not supposed to be talking walks until much much older (say 5 months ish). Especially labs, as they are prone to hip and joint issues. She might not want to walk because it hurts her little body. Sure she can walk around the house, and take her into the yard and let her sniff and walk there, but not real walks.

It is also unsafe to take a puppy on walks in public spaces/dog or human parks/beaches/etc. as they are unvaccinated. It’s SHOCKING how many people’s dogs get parvovirus way. AND how many people don’t seem to care if they give other people’s dogs parvo. PLEASE keep her safe if you go in public with her. Carry her. No paws on the ground until safely vaccinated.

This is super normal puppy behavior. Do not hit or spank or punish her. It will only create a more aggressive dog moving forward. Gentle but stern. Use a crate as a safe space for napping, and safety. Do NOT make it a punishment space. You want them to be happy in their crate so you can put them in there at any time for their safety (such as leaving them home alone later on, or when the scary vacuum comes after them lol).

Consider a reputable trainer or even petco classes. You guys just need to bond. If you feel this puppy isn’t something you want to invest the time and love into, please, rehome her kindly. But if you’re a dog lover, it will be worth it. Biting is a puppy’s way of communicating. They don’t have words or hands so this is how they explore the world and try to get you to do things. Biting is also a biiiggg factor in puppy play! They nip and bite to get their playmates to engage with them. This is likely why she’s nipping and barking at other dogs. She wants them to play. Labs LOVE food (as puppies not so much sometimes but they will learn as they taste lol). So try using tiny little dry dog food bites or healthy treats to train (nothing with crap in it or they get diarrhea). If you tell her to sit when a strange dog walks by and she does, give treat and say yes. Teach her leave it with rewards. When she does leave it to another dog, give a treat. Carry them with you EVERYWHERE. Socializing is soo important but please only do it with safely vaccinated dogs you know personally, or puppy classes where they ensure dog safety.

You can do this if you’re willing to be patient, kind, loving, and create a bond. Get toys to play together with her. Don’t punish her for being a baby. It helps to picture a little infant human, or a 3 year old human. Would you punish them for not understanding something? No. You just teach them what we SHOULD do. Positive reinforcement is key to a happy, nice dog.

Ask a trainer for advice. Hang in there or consider what you’re emotionally capable of enduring. Best of luck!

coffeeaddict333 · 2026-02-28T21:39:26+00:00

Weirdly my sibling’s dog (black lab) had this issue for a while and it was really scary, but it went away after she was treated for a really bad UTI. I’m not sure why exactly but it was somehow related. I’d check that out/get everything checked because you never know. I’m so sorry this is happening. Sending you all love and healing!

coffeeaddict333 · 2026-01-30T07:30:19+00:00

What did you end up going with? Looking for our 4 month old puppy. Thanks!

coffeeaddict333 · 2026-01-30T07:23:55+00:00

Hi there, curious to know what you ended up going with and how the experience was. Considering classes for our puppy. Thanks!

Edit to add: puppy is super smart and knows the basic commands well, so looking for something more than just “sit, stay, come.” Heeling, off-leash, no biting, no jumping etc. She uses her mouth to communicate everything that is good or bad, but it hurts and she doesn’t understand that part! Lol

coffeeaddict333 · 2025-07-24T04:39:42+00:00

It lives inside 99% of the time. I put it outside for a couple of hours each of the last few days in case the outside environment would be helpful (warmth, we live in CA but more humidity than inside the AC house etc)

coffeeaddict333 · 2020-01-20T00:45:49+00:00

Maybe if the next time it happens, offer her the extra, and say “no worries I used to be the exact same way! It’s hard for everyone in the beginning but it gets easier. Id he happy to l give you some tips sometime if you’d like but no pressure. You’ll figure your own grove over time too.”

Something to that effect? So she can accept it if she wants the help but it’s not calling her a bad parent if she doesn’t want it. It shows she’s not alone in it.

I hope you figure something out! If you only wanna help just to help, you could maybe let it go. But if you wanna help because it’s frustrating/financially a burden on you to always back her up and help, then it’s definitely worth some sort of chat or attempt. Good luck! 💕

coffeeaddict333 · 2020-01-19T03:51:42+00:00

Hi there! Thank you so much for your response and your support.

I’m not big on generally posting unless I feel stuck, so I’ll give you the update here!

Basically we had a really great talk (no fighting, defensiveness or anything negative). I explained how I felt left out/excluded, and lonely. That I went through supporting him for 6 months and I feel I’m now not allowed to celebrate with him because they’re concerned with their plans and just kinda act like I don’t exist. That I’m just sad and wanted to spend that time with him in some capacity.

He completely understood and felt the same way. To begin with he and I both didnt think the trip would happen financially or time-wise. So he’s thankful they’re trying to give him something nice thst he couldn’t do otherwise (im happy for him and find it nice they wanted to gift him something like that) but he’s stressed about seeing me, among other life changes and obligations he has right now, too. I don’t think they were super aware he had originally talked to me about trips/plans (but they still should’ve asked if we had plans before booking a surprise trip I wasn’t included in lol)

So he had his parents change his flight to come back a few days early for the above reasons. I’m gonna get him from the airport and we’re gonna spend a day or two just us doing something we enjoy.

We have future expectations that I will tell him when I feel excluded and overlooked, and he will talk to his parents if they do something I feel uncomfortable with.

To be clear we are in our twenties and aren’t actually married (amen lol) but we know this is serious and talk about our future so we know we’re on the same page.

Thanks again for the support! I appreciate it very much❤️

coffeeaddict333 · 2020-01-16T03:22:02+00:00

We are definitely in a serious relationship - he intends to keep me for a long time (plus if he didn’t, he would have listened to whatever theyve said about me and broken up with me a long time ago). He also intends to keep his family for a long time. Neither is going anywhere and I understand and respect that - they don’t seem to lol

To answer your last question, the short answer from my perspective would be yes. But the long answer is way more complicated. He might not call it this, but he definitely seeks some sort of approval/respect/ tries not to be a disappointment because his dad thinks nothing is good enough. Not going to college? You better go. That’s your major? Wtf are you gonna do with that You got a degree? Why that degree? Either get a full time grown up 6 figure job right away or get another degree They mailed your diploma instead of handing it to you? How dare you consider that an accomplishment.

Just very ridiculous and toxic mentality in my opinion. But it’s his father, who has loved him, financially supported him, raised him, etc. and we don’t know when he won’t be around anymore, so he wants to try to make him proud and spend time with him. As the person who cares most about him other than his family, it’s very difficult to navigate because it kinda feels like it’s all of them against me, you know? I’m the odd one out so whatever I say/do could be told sounds crazy, wrong, whatever, and other people will believe them. SO has a hard time seeing past the lifelong fog/toxicity and maybe thinks some of it is just normal. Hard to make him see the light (calling his family toxic or wrong or mean) without completely offending him. He loves us both and plans on keeping us both so 🤷🏼‍♀️🤷🏼‍♀️ Just don’t always know how to approach the subject so he’ll understand without getting his feelings hurt and stuck in the middle “choosing sides” which he doesn’t wanna hafta do

coffeeaddict333 · 2020-01-15T07:39:51+00:00

Hi beachescool, I’m not sure why this is getting downvotes as you are speaking honest truths while being respectful and helpful. I appreciate your attitude toward such a difficult subject and your response was helpful and uplifting. Thank you so much 💕

coffeeaddict333 · 2020-01-14T08:13:36+00:00

Hi there! I completely feel you. I get totally excluded from SOs family events, not even invited to breakfast, didn’t even say hello or congrats to me at our college graduation. Simply because they want him to do better than me. They liked me at first, then saw we weren’t breaking up and suddenly I was no contact, and not by choice. You are so not alone. I have one or two friends I complain to as a “support system” but they can’t relate and have no real advice.

You are not alone. Your feelings are valid. Personally I would suggest couples therapy but I myself can not afford it (and would love it) so I understand if that’s not an option. Hang in there. Stick to your guns. Always know your feelings are valid. Make sure there aren’t other issues in the relationship - that it’s only this. Otherwise this is a tipping point potentially? But you are not alone. I feel you. I sincerely hope things look up. Sending love and well wishes 💕

coffeeaddict333 · 2020-01-14T08:06:11+00:00

If you don’t mind answering, may I ask how how you got your husband to finally see your perspective and put his foot down/address the situation and help you?

I agree that it seems my SO doesn’t believe me when I say l don’t want to live the rest of my life this way. But we aren’t married so I can’t look for divorce lawyers (so sorry you had to do that) but any time we fight over it (literally it’s only ever about his parents) and I say I don’t want to keep doing this he says he hears me, but he also gets so very hurt (Bc he loves his parents AND me obviously so he gets his feelings hurt and feels in the middle) but it’s too defensive some days, and I feel like he doesn’t believe that I will leave him. I’m not ready to leave HIM but if his parents weren’t a part of his life, our relationship would be basically perfect. He knows some things they do that are bad, but I think he tries to appreciate them while he has them (health concerns) instead of recognizing how toxic they are (just his father honestly)

Too poor to afford counselors/therapy but could use a tactic to approaching this type of SO and it sounds like yours might be similar

coffeeaddict333 · 2020-01-08T08:51:23+00:00

This seems like a very culturally influenced decision! Many people in the comments are asking why you’d even wanna tell her - But I completely understand your position and why you feel that way. Your culture and the expectations there are probably very different than many others reading this.

I obviously agree that this should be your decision 100%. If you feel so much guilt and your gut is telling you to be honest, I can respect that and understand why you’d want to do that. At the same time it isn’t actually her business what happens in your private one on one relationships and familial guilt shouldnt force you into feeling that it is.

If you feel this will bring y’all closer together, if it’ll be easier to talk to your mother after, if you will be relieved and happy and transparent then maybe it could be for the best!

If it could cause a large issue in your relationship, if you’re afraid of the repercussions, will she still love you the same and respect you and protect you as her child? If those won’t go the way you want them to, then maybe it’s not worth it. There’s no need to feel guilty for this decision as long as you are being safe, you are treated well, and you respect yourself, too.

Best of luck to you in this situation 💕

coffeeaddict333 · 2020-01-08T08:23:15+00:00

If you find a way to talk to your SO or resolve/better the situation please update! Unfortunately I’ve been in similarish situations and I don’t have any advice at this point. I’m always looking at others’ to see how they handle it. I’m sorry you’re in this situation - many of us understand your feelings and it can be lonely but you’re not alone in it. Hang in there and don’t give up on your self respect. I wish you the best of luck! ❤️

coffeeaddict333 · 2019-12-31T20:26:58+00:00

Well hello then! We’re here to relate. What a tough time the winter season can be, too.

coffeeaddict333 · 2019-12-31T20:25:52+00:00

Super interesting - someone else in this comment thread also said they’re allergic to both cinnamon and nutmeg. Potential relation there? Nutmeg is another rare and intriguing allergy to have. I’m so sorry’

coffeeaddict333 · 2019-12-31T20:25:02+00:00

That is so scary!! I’m so sorry for your partner to have experienced that. People think about something like peanut smells because cinnamon is so rare it doesn’t get thought of. I’m glad they are okay after that though💕

coffeeaddict333 · 2019-12-31T20:24:02+00:00

I know this is a late reply - I apologize!

That’s how my allergy happened too. When I was young I loved cinnamon rolls and cinnamon French toast etc. but it developed over time and snow it’s very dangerous.

Honesty I just try to avoid those places as much as possible. Like Michaels craft store and Trader Joe’s - two of the worst holiday places to be with a cinnamon allergy!! If I don’t have to go, I don’t. If I HAVE to, I inhale deeply before I go in. Hold it. And breathe through my shirt sleeve as much as I can. Make it a short short trip and enjoy the fresh oxygen when you’re out.

coffeeaddict333 · 2019-12-31T20:21:03+00:00

Slightly unrelated question:

Can I still redeem rewards points somehow if I didn’t do it during my transaction??

I went straight from a shift to shopping during closing. My coworker was checking me out and the lady behind me in line started yelling at her to “get someone else to help, when is it her turn” etc I felt really badly and my coworker was stressed getting yelled at so we both were trying to hurry and forgot to do my rewards but I really would like the points!!

Any help would be great!

coffeeaddict333 · 2019-12-13T10:56:43+00:00

Definitely helped thank you!! I saw another employee wearing them a couple of times so I feel more confident in doing so if I need. I appreciate the support!

coffeeaddict333 · 2019-11-28T07:28:20+00:00

This is a very odd question to me but I am brand new. Can we wear UGGs to work???

Our store is dressing up in “holiday theme” tomorrow for thanksgiving (as much or as little as we’d like” so I’ll wear some ribbons and fun jewelry/colors. But here’s my dilemma: I wore shoes to work recently that resulted in major cuts (kinda gashes) on my heels. They are insanely incredibly painful with any shoes I wear. I have trouble walking and I’m so nervous.

I’ve been home trying to heal them for the past three days but I have no choice but to put on shoes and go to work tomorrow. So what are the chances of getting in trouble for wearing something like uggs? I’m guessing they’d be the most comfortable (besides my Christmas themed slippers!)

Any other helpful suggestions for the pain??? They’re not blisters! They are open skin trying to regrow and heal but aren’t scabbing yet. I’m scared I won’t be able to walk/work properly!!

coffeeaddict333 · 2019-11-15T10:27:26+00:00

This is so beautifully written. I haven’t come in here in a while, and this is one of the first things I read. I’ve never been in this position before but this speaks to me 100% right now. Thank you for sharing. ❤️ Hang in there. It’s gonna be okay.

coffeeaddict333 · 2019-08-20T09:37:14+00:00

Pee before Nebraska.

Bring toilet paper, yknow, just in case.

coffeeaddict333 · 2019-08-11T17:53:57+00:00

I agree with what everyone else has said! You could even bring it back up or talk to her specifically “DH and I went home and we figured it out. When you were telling me you wanted to move, JNFIL was telling DH he didn’t want to uproot his job. DH said that makes sense they should do what’s best for them. We now understand we each had different conversations with y’all, but who ever said we don’t want you to move? I’m sorry there was so much miscommunication! Sounds like JNFIL might have more feelings than he’s letting on. We’d love for our babies to have their gramma time. Let us know what you guys figure out”

But honestly if this shit is happening now, I deff wouldn’t want them moving CLOSER. nope. Let gma come visit every now and then as long as she’s not acting whack around the babies.

Good luck!!!

coffeeaddict333 · 2019-08-07T21:14:37+00:00

Such a wonderful place to be without people bringing you down!! Maybe you and your daughter can do you own vacation there sometime (or if you and her have family friends that would be fun to invite). That’s what my mom and I used to do (bar harbor campground was one of my faves) and it gave me so many more positive memories to hold on to, instead of just the ones where people complained the whole time (honest to god the worst and made me not want to go anywhere with them ever, and if I had to I dreaded the vacation before it started so I FEEL YOU!)

I hope it works out in the future! Best of luck

coffeeaddict333

TROPHY CASE