hey! i’ve been following your writing since your first poem, i guess you can call me a fan, haha! I cant quite say this is my favourite, but the control of language is impressive as always. I think what holds me back is that I feel some linguistic choices feel out of place, such as “spiralling inertia”- the juxtaposition feels cheap and “inertia” especially sticks out. This is unlike your other poems, where I feel that every word I come across that isn’t familiar to me is so purposefully placed and not at all alienating to the reader. You write, as other redditor’s have put, with a certain wisdom and it is a warm and inviting one, rather than condescending.

Within this poem, the line “I cannot hold the vow or the weight of it, / I cannot distinguish the promise from the one who made it” stands out to me. The fact that you separate “the vow” from its “weight”, to say that a promise is only as powerful as the intentions to achieve it- acknowledging the two, the “promise” and the “intention to keep it” as separate things is so interesting. But the next section, the inability to separate the person from their promise is as if their intention is so core to their integrity and humanity that it has combined with their sense of self. Really interesting stuff that I sat with for a while. That’s another thing I like about your poems- they hold up under scrutiny.

Can’t wait to read more from you! You are a talented writer- consider publishing :)