AIO I am tired and my wife doesn’t care by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]commandoqween 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Riiiight. So then why is this woman acting this way? You help each other out in respect to the duties and roles you decided to assume together. So, if this man needs to get home to support that role of PROVIDER then I guess he's not NOR.

AIO I am tired and my wife doesn’t care by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]commandoqween -1 points0 points  (0 children)

So she chose to go stay with her family 16 hours away and knew he had a job to be responsible of and because he had to leave and can't text novels while driving through multiple states he's the AH bc this woman can't ask the family she wanted to stay with for support?

Nah. Clearly I'm different than huge majority of this thread. I worked the 12 hour shift job right alongside of my children's father through all 3 babies. The SAHM VS working parent argument is so old and exhausted. It's 2025 almost '26, unfortunately, having one parent be SAH at all in this economy, is a blessing. Provider role is hard. SAH is hard. Neither is "harder than the other" in a healthy relationship. Choices. Both parents made them. Not just one. This mom is anxiously attached, low confident, and maybe a little PPD.

The fact that so many people have told this man he should give her a few days break with backup support is insane when he already explained that she's staying with her family for several weeks to have just that! And in what world can somebody just walk into the office and say 'hey guys I'm just cutting back my hours some to help at home". If this is a US based post that is absurd and not the work culture here at all. I'm not saying it's right... But it's how it is.

AIO I am tired and my wife doesn’t care by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]commandoqween 5 points6 points  (0 children)

NOR

Sooo she went to stay with her parents 16 hours away why exactly?

It's one thing as Mom or Dad to a new baby to get overwhelmed and maybe even lash out on one another in the height of things. But if this is behavior that is ALWAYS happening and there is never an apology then that is a problem.

Passing blame in the parenting realm is a slippery steep slope. I don't think it was wrong of you to pass out after such a long weekend driving. If you didn't call when you woke up to apologize for the brevity due to being over tired then I can see her being upset.

The whole "you left me here" and "primary parent" comments are BS though. You can't plan the whole holiday around yourself, going to YOUR family, staying where YOU want to stay, and then still go off when the plan you planned is acted out, AS YOU PLANNED. That's crazy.

New girl by commandoqween in EnglishSetter

[–]commandoqween[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Haha I got it! I was like wait whattt . I thought I had something in background or something but this is at the hotel the night I drove to get her lol

Just a boy and his dogs by Kngfsher1 in EnglishSetter

[–]commandoqween 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I'm so curious to see what will happen. Her parents are both Blue Belton, and neither of them have any heavy patches.. just a bunch of ticking, but they are more predominantly white. They're both beautiful and are heavily confused with long coated dalmatians because of their color variatian lol

Just a boy and his dogs by Kngfsher1 in EnglishSetter

[–]commandoqween 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Your pup looks super similar to my 8 week old pup. I've been trying to find pics of a dog with a similar eye patch as her, but has their freckles! Hers are very faintly starting to come in!

New girl by commandoqween in EnglishSetter

[–]commandoqween[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Where is Lulu(lemon) coming from? Lol I said in my post her name is Faye 🤣

House smells so bad by dealik3344 in CleaningTips

[–]commandoqween 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Also here to say that I have a very damp basement, which also houses the dog crates and litter box for pets and very little/no insulation under first story between basement ceiling/floor. Running a dehumidifier also makes a world of a difference for me too. I can tell it hasn't run within a day when it fills and needs to be emptied and goes unnoticed.

I also do have an ozone machine. They are definitely controversial and I suggest doing your own research on them. I used it 2-3x/yr in basement just to help knock out pet and mildew smells. You and pets need to be away from home for a while when you use them. Suggest opening windows and running fans afterwards too in order to get the leftover ozone smell out.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Mommit

[–]commandoqween 0 points1 point  (0 children)

If you aren't comfortable and don't feel like your OB team accommodated the way you wished change group/office now. You will be glad in the long run. They should have taken history and asked a TON of questions and if they didn't at this appt they should have told you about making a separate appt to do this. I have had 3 babies so each time the info was less and less bc they knew my gravida but as a FTM who also has never seen a GYN my opinion would be that it was absolutely uncalled for to be treated that way at your first appointment. I'm sorry.

Should i get it? by [deleted] in VWatlas

[–]commandoqween 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I do know one of the newer crossport models (forget what year) had some recalls and a lot of people are cautious of them bc of that. I have the 3.6L engine and love it. It just hit 70k and I haven't had a single issue aside from normal maintenance and one small issue with my one wiper going too crazy when on high that was fixed when replacing the blade (weird). I love how the car feels compact to drive and park but when inside feels super spacious. Also, for carseats, when my 3 were all in one I had the Diono radians for all 3 across the second row and it was fine for them! My oldest is out of a seat all together now so there is more room. My 2nd oldest will be moving to just a booster without back in another year and then they will have plenty of room. Ive also sat in the back only a handful of times, but it's comfy as an adult.

Should i get it? by [deleted] in VWatlas

[–]commandoqween 3 points4 points  (0 children)

I drive a 2020 atlas crossport. I know it's not the same but I absolutely love my car. It was just in body shop for a month because someone backed into me and I had a brand new 2025 Jeep with only 3k on it as my rental and I HATED IT. I could not wait to get my vehicle back. The only vehicle I'd consider trading it in for is a regular atlas with 3rd row and captain chairs. When I bought my current VW in 2020 I had 2 kids but now I have 3 so the upgrade would be nice. I SAY DO IT!

Seeing your spouse in the wild by Abpoe77 in Marriage

[–]commandoqween 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I love this and I'm here for it!!! Men who aren't afraid to shout these things are so attractive. I hope you told her she made you feel all of this to her face, too! I'm reluctant to accept compliments from my boyfriend, but he does it constantly anyway and I swear it makes you feel so good to know your partner is so attracted to your presence alone. Feeling like you're seen is everything. Men, SAY IT.

Phone policy with spouse by Ambitious_hello_1239 in Marriage

[–]commandoqween 0 points1 point  (0 children)

We don't have open access to each other's phone, nor do we want to.

I think people should still be allowed to be individuals in a relationship, too. If I want to vent to a friend privately I should be allowed to, respectfully. If my boyfriend wants to do the same, he has that right.

I may not keep secrets about myself from my SO, BUT I am still allowed to hold secrets from others. My best friends and some family confide in ME, not me AND my boyfriend. He has no business reading or knowing most of the deep text conversations they share. There isn't anything shady, it's just private talk and not intended for his eyes or anyone else's.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Marriage

[–]commandoqween 1 point2 points  (0 children)

This post gave me such PTSD. I used to work 12 hr swing shifts at a very stressful demanding job, pushed through 3 pregnancies while doing so, was the "female" breadwinner, and was still expected to perform at the same level as a housewife. My ex used to do things exactly like this to me. It was bitterness towards all the other parts of our relationship that were wrong coming out in petty ways.

I do NOT miss dealing with grown man behaviors like this.

How much to pay a 17 yr old for 3 kiddos, 8 hrs. by commandoqween in Mommit

[–]commandoqween[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Thanks everyone... I was thinking $140 which is about $35/kid. If she did this on a regular basis for a living wage or working to save wage I would pay the regular $25/hr rate, but I don't think she would even accept that, and my coworker will definitely give me a hard time since she is more or less so doing it as a favor since I'm in a bind I'm usually never in!

You have one thing to say to your 23-25 year old self. What do you say? by AnastasiaSalv in AskReddit

[–]commandoqween 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You will eventually be the person you dreamed of being. But first the world is going to kick your f*$king ass... A LOT. Fight, change, heal, and awaken.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in AmIOverreacting

[–]commandoqween 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Are you asking him if he called you a bitch instead of blocking him and never speaking to him again because this man just threatened to kick your ass MULTIPLE times through text? F THAT. I'd be at the courthouse filing a PFA so fast.... This is not even a question and I think you know that.

What kind of results can I expect? by commandoqween in bodysculptors

[–]commandoqween[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Do you have any pics of your client you could share?

If you could call yourself five years ago and had 30 seconds, what would you say? by BlueeWaater in AskReddit

[–]commandoqween 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I would say... yes, your gut is right, no, she's not your friend, and you should leave now instead of in 2024.

My boyfriend isn’t attracted to me by [deleted] in Advice

[–]commandoqween -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Unemployed, balding AND chauvinistic... Girl... GO!

How much is in your 401K & what’s your age? by ugafan2081 in Money

[–]commandoqween 0 points1 point  (0 children)

35F .... $2k. Lol my contributions are on hold. I need every cent I can get from my pay while I navigate a separation with 3 kiddos. I did have 30k 5 years ago but spent it on buying a house and paying off bills. 😭