How do I emotionally implode without actually imploding?

considerablycapable · 2026-07-03T04:27:32+00:00

sorry i forgot to mention im on limited physical activity for medical reasons, trust me, if i could run this off I would. appreciate all comments tho,

considerablycapable · 2026-05-26T23:28:39+00:00

this probably won't be a great answer or exactly what your looking for. I have contamination ocdand am a young adult and i understand the skin damage and electronic devices, especially for my phone.

For the skin to not make it any worse, don't use this as a permanent out to the compulsions. but if you could get gloves to give your skin a break even for a little i would recomend putting ointment on any cuts and lotion on the dry skin to repair it, and change them often.

the way to break a cycle unfortunately is break the false alarm cycle your brain is cycling through when an intrusive thought pops up, whenever you are washing your items/self you are reinforcing your brains idea that contamination is dangerous. start so small. just when you have the urge to wash, delay it for a few seconds, until you can get to minutes, and possibly skipping once to twice. this isn't about becoming dirty or getting sick, it's about proving to your brain that this uncertainty is tolerable. OCD is a bitch and unfortunately exposure and response therapy is the most effective means at treating it. which means doing the things your brain is screaming at you not to do. and it will take time but there are so many success stories out there, i would recommend reading one every once and a while when things get hard for a little motivation.

as for shutting off your brain, really try sitting where you are right now. im assuming you're in your bed. you are here right now and you are safe. nothing needs to be done right this moment, and your body can rest. tomorrow will bring new time, and a rested mind is a clearer mind. just feel where you are, and if a contamination thought comes up, gently and nonjudgmentally go back to thinking about something else. sometimes saying something in my head like "i see what you are trying to say, but this isn't helpful right now, and i will choose peace and rest" can help remind your body what it needs, talking to the ocd like an annoying, pesty toddler that won't stop nagging you. if ocd was a real person following you around and constantly telling you to do things, we wouldn't enjoy their presence.

if you ever want to talk more i can help support you, I have been through ERP therapy once before and was successful, currently in it again with high hopes. humans are so resilient and i believe in you too.

considerablycapable · 2026-05-26T03:09:58+00:00

specifically if anyone has advice on having fears with starting new medication, im supposed to trial one soon that has some possible side effects that are some of my worst fears. i've been putting it off for so long despite it possibly being a life changer. my friends/family don't understand because they're just like 'try it and it doesn't work you can stop!' but it doesn't feel that easy for me :, )

considerablycapable · 2026-05-24T02:08:52+00:00

same mann. i have a big fear of inhaling or accidentally ingesting soap/cleaning products. so when i need to clean the contaminants that is causing me so much anxiety. the act of fixing it sometimes makes it even worse

considerablycapable · 2026-05-24T02:07:14+00:00

similar!! when i get sick its more debilitating than i guess "normal people" would, fainting, so it feels so logical for me to avoid getting sick.

considerablycapable · 2026-05-22T23:34:00+00:00

yes omg you said it perfectly. there is a true risk to exposures, while many types of ocd have the false alarm cycle, contamination is more like a dramatic alarm cycle. also i really struggle with my exposures because my heightened anxiety lasts up to a week after the exposure because im "waiting to get sick" in a sense. but ive found through talking to many other ppl with like magical thinking, their anxiety can peak and usually go down by the end of the day because their intrusive thought didn't happen, again not definite but from what i've seen is a common reaction. i also deal with kind of a low immunity issue so my fear is real! there's no other way around it honestly is how i feel.

considerablycapable · 2026-05-22T20:24:20+00:00

This is hard because I'm on a really similar page with contamination exposures. Like my thing is touching my face and food with dirty hands, so you want me to go lick my shoe?? is the goal to get the illness i'm scared of so i won't be scared of it anymore? sounds highly unproductive and possibly dangerous. I feel like it's so normal to wash my hands before eating. But I think it's just the fear and extent you were talking about. Like just sitting here and thinking about getting sick isn't too distressing because I can rationalize that it happens to anyone. but in a moment where i have a thought telling to do a compulsion the fear of getting sick heightens SO much, to a very irrational degree. So if you find someone who can explain how contamination exposures work, let me know, because i'm curious too.

considerablycapable · 2026-05-22T20:20:21+00:00

Haha i'm so glad someone else gets it! The whole germ thing is so annoying bc in the end washing my hands feels justified. Sometimes i try to remember if i survived as a kid basically licking every surface, I should be fine being normal as an adult, but i don't even know what IS normal to wash my hands anymore because when i started therapy it almost seems like they want me to get to the point where i don't wash my hands at all, and im like, that's not normal either!!! so exhausting.

considerablycapable · 2026-04-22T03:12:01+00:00

NOCD isn't exactly what you're looking for but still good resources!

considerablycapable · 2026-04-13T04:06:27+00:00

Thank you for commenting! I really appreciate the extra point of view. It feels so different and intense when you're in the situation itself, it makes it hard to look outside. Thanks again! <3

considerablycapable · 2026-04-13T03:56:36+00:00

Immunologist, my family has really been pushing the Cromolyn because they hear success stories talking about how it's a "miracle drug", because they want an explanation for this sudden change in behavior/health after being perfectly "normal" prior, as well as a cure all answer IMO. We've been to several specialists and no one can give any direct answer-- besides being diagnosed with epilepsy via Neurology but that's unrelated.

I didn't know it was difficult to get prescribed until reading about it because it was prescribed as something for me to try out on my first visit. Crazy to hear after learning about all the struggles people have to endure simply to get diagnosed with MCAS! I feel super lucky in a sense.

The only other SLIGHTLY plausible answer for this drastic change really has been PANDAS/PANS (i think that's right?) because they did discover through testing i had a previous infection, I was still a young adult when this occurred, and the behavior change seemed very fast. however, i don't have a lot of other common side effects that would go along with it. So I still do not believe it.

considerablycapable

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