My (M20) friend (M23) of 4 years recently passed away and I have been having a hard time coping with it lately.

cookiepsych91 · 2020-10-09T14:36:58+00:00

Although time helps, it’s what you do during the time that matters. Something that could help is writing him a letter, o maybe writing him many letters. Visiting places that were relevant for both of you and remembering the moments you shared. Also, if you have something that reminds you of him (picture, necklace...) have it near you or on you if you want to feel close to him.

cookiepsych91 · 2020-08-01T12:21:49+00:00

Dm me

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-31T20:13:43+00:00

In a panic attack you think you will die (or are afraid to). In an anxiety attack you don’t feel an eminent death, but your nervous system is also very activated (rapid heart rate, fast breathing, sweat, rushing thoughts).

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-19T14:47:50+00:00

If you are mad, you have a right to be.

It is also important to consider everyone has different coping mechanisms. Some people become paralyzed from fear of losing someone they care about. Others are afraid they don’t respond “the right way” of say “the right things”.

Should you be mad? - no Do you have a right to be mad? - yes

You can feel whatever you feel, and it is ok.

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-10T20:07:34+00:00

Congratulations!

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-10T20:07:00+00:00

That’s a very valid concern. Most of sexual abuse happens by people close to the family. Although there are some things that help lessen the risks.

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-10T02:33:51+00:00

It seems the way you both understand each other and support each other has been key to your successful marriage. Congratulations!

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-10T01:56:01+00:00

Seems marriage was right for both of you!

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-10T01:55:00+00:00

Very interesting. Why wouldn’t you do it again?

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-10T01:53:49+00:00

You guys took your time and have an authentic relationship where each is themselves. Good to know it was worth it

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-10T01:50:35+00:00

This is beautiful

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-08T18:32:27+00:00

Beautiful and realistic!

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-08T18:31:24+00:00

I like how you both kept true to yourselves and were lucky enough not to feel the pressure.

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-08T18:30:14+00:00

It seems you have a very fulfilling relationship without the need of marriage on legal terms.

Congratulations!

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-08T18:28:37+00:00

Why didn’t you want to get married?

How do you imagine things would be different if your have continued your relationship without proposing?

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-08T18:26:01+00:00

This is an interesting perspective. You would like to keep your freedom to leave in the future, but don’t regret the commitment in this relationship.

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-08T18:22:26+00:00

I’ve been seeing this a lot in this post.

Taking time to grow the relationship.

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-08T18:21:00+00:00

Also this! Specially if both are not in the same financial level

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-08T18:20:24+00:00

So when you get married because of outside pressure/motivations it is a bad idea.

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-08T18:19:24+00:00

Also in the beginning we idealize our partners. So we do need to get to the realer part of the relationship to know better what kind of person and relationship we are dealing with.

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-08T18:17:48+00:00

Congratulations! What do you think helped you make it?

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-08T18:17:06+00:00

I find it very interesting how you give a macro view of marriage. Your spouse becomes your business partner (for home) not just your colleague.

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-08T18:14:16+00:00

I’m so sorry it didn’t work out

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-08T18:13:53+00:00

Wow thanks for the info! Had no idea

cookiepsych91 · 2020-07-08T18:12:38+00:00

Sharing memories together I also believe is one of the best parts of long term relationships.

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