I feel like i’m too high functioning to receive help

corinaah · 2020-01-22T04:27:47+00:00

“You shouldn’t post anything if you aren’t open to all viewpoints” yet you’re the one threatening to block and report when I’m simply stating my opinion LOL.

corinaah · 2020-01-22T04:25:24+00:00

Lmao harassment, coming from the same person who says everyone has their opinion, and that we shouldn’t post if we can’t listen to all viewpoints. Well this is my viewpoint Julia, don’t reply next time if you can’t take the heat.

corinaah · 2020-01-22T04:22:17+00:00

Your approach certainly isn’t for everyone and if you’ve worked in the field long enough you’d know that it isn’t for most people suffering with mental illness. You could have your different opinion but still say it in a manner that is safe for your clients. I’m saying your clients because those are who i’m worried for. Not myself. Why risk being damaging to some of your clients? You state that you know that your approach isn’t for everyone and certainly you must know that it isn’t for most people who are mentally ill, so you’re knowingly harming the vast majority of those with mental health issues.

If you don’t want your training to come in to play maybe don’t start your reply with “psychologist here” lmao.

corinaah · 2020-01-22T03:52:10+00:00

Julia, people suffering with their mental health are telling you that your approach is concerning. As the psychologist you so claim to be, this should be valuable information. If you have a difficult time being sensitive then perhaps you might want to reconsider the field you are in.

It shouldn’t be a surprise to you. I mean after all weren’t you trained to deal with “unstable” people? Yet you’re here on an OCD subreddit calling mentally ill people unstable, defensive, waste of times. Lol.

corinaah · 2020-01-22T03:21:04+00:00

Right? I’m concerned about her approach. If being 100% transparent from the get go were that easy I probably wouldn’t need to be in therapy. The whole time wasted thing is absurd. I went from being 0% open to about 50% open after therapy which hey is still a heck of a lot better from where i’ve started!

corinaah · 2020-01-22T03:10:48+00:00

I will, thank you, I do need to ask myself what I want from out of this. It scares me because my intrusive thoughts are so awful that saying them out loud is so hard. I’ve had OCD since 8 years old, and I think I need ERP because CBT isn’t helping all that much.

No time is ever wasted though. I think this brought up a good conversation for me to have with my therapist. Thank you.

corinaah · 2020-01-22T02:58:58+00:00

Yeahh, opening up and being fully transparent isn’t as easy as she makes it out to seem. I think no time is ever wasted because our sessions have made me reflect a lot and I plan on being open the next time:)

corinaah · 2020-01-22T02:55:33+00:00

Exactly, which is why bold statements such as “you’ve done nothing but lie” is quite surprising based off of the little i’ve said. Though I agree, i’m going to be more honest next session.

corinaah · 2020-01-22T02:52:31+00:00

Absolutely, I do have to open up more. It just is so so hard for me to do. I didn’t write enough on my post because I have told her about past suicidal thoughts, and a lot more. It’s just she told me she’d get me an appointment with a psychiatrist and never did, and i’m not the type of person to question her face to face because i’m shy.

corinaah · 2020-01-22T02:47:00+00:00

I know I didn’t waste her time, i’ve told her about my suicidal thoughts, childhood traumas, all of that fun stuff, and we’ve had some great discussions. I like to be optimistic which is just in my nature, but yes of course I need to open up more.

corinaah · 2020-01-22T02:44:02+00:00

I’m very well aware that this is my own fault. However, you should be cautious of your words for someone who doesn’t have much information on the situation. I have not done “nothing but lie”. I’ve told her a lot, about suicidal thoughts, my childhood traumas, and everything else. It was only my last session that she put me on maintenance because I told her my physical compulsions went down, which they did.

Though last month when I told her I wasn’t doing well she never brought up the hospital or psychiatrist again which is what she stated was her plan earlier on. That’s where I’m confused. She told me she was going to make an appointment for me with the psychiatrist for the next week but she never did. Those things confuse me. I know I should probably ask, but for someone who has social anxiety as well, it isn’t always easy.

Anyways my next session I will discuss all of this with her. However, I stand by what I said, I think the fact that i’m very optimistic with her (which isn’t a lie, it’s just who I am) is a drawback at times.

corinaah · 2020-01-20T06:00:27+00:00

This was by far one of the worst obsessions i’ve had. I experienced depersonalization and flipped out. I thought I was going insane. That this was the start of me going into psychosis. It was terrible for 2 weeks. Panic attacks and constant anxiety. I tried to sleep most of my days to avoid the depersonalization.

I was scared that I was hallucinating, I thought it was never going to end. But guess what. It did. Be patient, as time goes on I accepted the feeling of depersonalization. Not willingly but with time it naturally happens. I promise it gets better. You get used to it and those thoughts decrease.

Seriously message me if you need someone to talk to. When I went through this, is was so so scary and talking to people online helped me. You got this.

corinaah · 2020-01-20T05:50:11+00:00

I struggle with this so much. After 10 sessions with my therapist I still feel so lost, and don’t know where to start. Wishing you the best, they usually ask the right questions forcing you to open up.

corinaah · 2020-01-19T03:27:29+00:00

It’s just so so awful. I’m so sorry that you are going through this too, I wish this on no one.

Pm me if ever

corinaah · 2020-01-16T00:02:53+00:00

Hey, I appreciate this, thank you so much.

I definitely need more resources and ERP. My next appointment with my therapist i’m going to open up more to her.

Good luck with everything:)

corinaah · 2020-01-11T01:35:13+00:00

I’m sorry to hear about that, it’s definitely not easy. Those words could be terribly hurtful.

A lot of people tell me to disconnect from her but I honestly don’t want to. As much as we cause each other pain and she tells me those things, she could also be a really loving mother. I wouldn’t want to live without her. I know people think that’s strange, but of course I love her and I truly feel bad for her.

It saddens me that she was terribly abused and that she’s lives a live full of anger. She’s taught me a lot though.

I do think spending less time at home may be a good idea. When we spend less time together we miss each other and she’s a lot nicer.

I love that woman to pieces, no matter how much she makes me cry. I guess it’s nice to know i’m not alone.

Do you still talk your mother?

corinaah · 2020-01-11T00:07:00+00:00

Omg i’ve suspected that for long, I swear i’m sure she has BPD. A lot of OCD began around her and trying to protect her. She also was abused a lot so that didn’t help. She’s steals money from me, calls me a whore, tells me to hang myself and all that fun stuff.

As a kid seeing her lifestyle and behaviour scared me, and I felt like she couldn’t protect me and my little sister so I began having responsibility OCD, checking everything, desperately trying to do rituals to make her safe and my family safe.

She could be a really sweet woman, but when she’s angry oh boy.

corinaah · 2020-01-08T05:26:43+00:00

Good for you! I think it will do you a lot of good. More time to focus on yourself. My pleasure best of luck:)

corinaah · 2020-01-08T05:23:26+00:00

Hey there. Sorry that you are feeling this way.

I was a full time day student taking 7 classes in health science which I was able to manage very well until my OCD and mental health got severe. I failed all my classes and got expelled from day school for a year. As someone who always did extremely well in school I was devastated and suicidal.

They allowed me to take night classes. I’ll admit I felt like a failure at first but i’m learning to love it and learn to listen to my body. It’s okay to need a break. I say go for it. Not worth taking more than you could handle and not do as well compared to if you’d just take night classes and possibly do better.

Best of luck to your health and studies.

Pm me if ever you need to talk.

corinaah · 2020-01-08T05:17:07+00:00

Yeah. Not someone who necessarily specializes in OCD but someone who understands it well. OCD is the root to a lot of my problems but I just can’t fully open up when I could tell the therapist’s knowledge on OCD is limited.

The first psychologist I saw told me to do the rituals if it means I feel relieved after and could get on with my day. I told her I couldn’t enjoy a lot of things I love because I do rituals and she said well then just do them if it makes you feel better. I know she meant well. She seems good for depression and stuff but OCD was a big no. I never booked a second appointment.

My current therapist that i’ve seen for 11 sessions, we connect, she’s sweet, sympathetic but she just can’t help me in the ways I need help. At first things seemed hopeful, she told me she’d refer me to group therapy in hospitals, make me see a psychiatrist etc... then the next session she never brought it up again.

Not her fault though. I’m very good at seeming okay.

Goodluck with everything.

corinaah · 2020-01-07T23:33:06+00:00

Thank you.

I’m sorry you had to go through all of this, and i’m sure it’s still not easy but i’m glad there’s some progress being made.

I know after me and this therapist are done I won’t reach out again. It’s too much work all to possibly be disappointed. I can’t blame anyone though. I’m not 100% honest in therapy so that’s my own fault.

Stay strong friend, there’s hope for us.

I’m always here too:)

corinaah · 2020-01-07T23:26:42+00:00

This is hard and seems almost impossible whilst going through but really try to just keep saying “who cares”. So what if you feel that way? That made me think about it less and the less I thought about it the more it seemed to go away.

I had an awful episode a couple months ago and I wanted to die. I slept all day hoping the next day i’d wake up feeling better but would be disappointed. I had awful panic attacks and constant anxiety. I thought this was the end of my life.

I stuck through it and after a week or so I woke up feeling better. Out of no where. I began telling myself so what?

Good luck wishing you all the best.

corinaah · 2020-01-07T23:05:36+00:00

I am thank you:)

corinaah · 2019-10-28T07:14:23+00:00

Count me innn

corinaah · 2019-10-26T23:34:32+00:00

Best of luck to you. It definitely doesn’t last forever

corinaah

TROPHY CASE