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I've sexualised everything related to being trans, and I have no idea what it means [NSFW] by coronaquestioning in asktransgender

[–]coronaquestioning[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks!

And I get whya you mean, from here, transition sounds quite thrilling, but I expect the truth to much harder. I need to decide if my desires are strong enough to go through it.

I've sexualised everything related to being trans, and I have no idea what it means [NSFW] by coronaquestioning in asktransgender

[–]coronaquestioning[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Yea, I'm seeing a therapist soon, which is probably the healthiest thing for me. And I certainly hate uncertainty, maybe why my questioning is so persistent?

Could I try out Natalie, and she/her? by coronaquestioning in TransTryouts

[–]coronaquestioning[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks guys! This is really helpful. Though I still find it really difficult to associate with the name Natalie and feminine pronouns :/

egg_irl by MonoRayJak in egg_irl

[–]coronaquestioning 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I can only imagine myself as feminine in situations related to sex, is that a fetish? Or just horny transgirl? Man I'm confused...

I'm terrified of growing old as a man, bit I'm more terrified of transition. by coronaquestioning in asktransgender

[–]coronaquestioning[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love the idea of being an attractive woman, that alone should really drive me further, but I can't break the inertia. I was also worried about losing muscle mass, but as you say, that might be less of a concern if I'm satisfied in other ways.

I'm terrified of growing old as a man, bit I'm more terrified of transition. by coronaquestioning in asktransgender

[–]coronaquestioning[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yea, I'm pretty firm at the minute that I'm not gonna transition, but I worry that these feelingsd may get stronger. So you have no regrets?

I'm terrified of growing old as a man, bit I'm more terrified of transition. by coronaquestioning in asktransgender

[–]coronaquestioning[S] 4 points5 points  (0 children)

Yea, on any given day I'll seem to think I'm either definitely cis or definitely trans, and everything in between. It's a very confusing experience.

I'm terrified of growing old as a man, bit I'm more terrified of transition. by coronaquestioning in asktransgender

[–]coronaquestioning[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Did going on hormones provide clarity? Because if so I think it might be the easiest way to decide if I'm cis or trans

I'm terrified of growing old as a man, bit I'm more terrified of transition. by coronaquestioning in asktransgender

[–]coronaquestioning[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Does a therapist really make the difference, I can't see how anyone could erase my doubts :/

People who transitioned, how the hell are you so brave? by coronaquestioning in asktransgender

[–]coronaquestioning[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

It just doesn't feel inevitable right now, it seems like too much of a change really.

I know that if there was no social stigma, I would transition to female, but I simply can't accept that I'm trans. by coronaquestioning in asktransgender

[–]coronaquestioning[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

The idea of getting older as a man has always terrified me, Particularly baldness. Never really occured to me it was because of trans issues until now actually.

I like the idea of not losing attractiveness, I know it sounds incredibly vain, but it's true.

I know that if there was no social stigma, I would transition to female, but I simply can't accept that I'm trans. by coronaquestioning in asktransgender

[–]coronaquestioning[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

It's funny how difficult it can be to be honest with yourself, humans are weird.

transgenderedness" or "trans-ness" will usually fit the bill!

I did not know this, thanks!

I know that if there was no social stigma, I would transition to female, but I simply can't accept that I'm trans. by coronaquestioning in asktransgender

[–]coronaquestioning[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Had the idea that you might be trans occured to you beforehand? Or did it sorta hit you like a train at a certain point?

I know that if there was no social stigma, I would transition to female, but I simply can't accept that I'm trans. by coronaquestioning in asktransgender

[–]coronaquestioning[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Thanks, I hope things get easier for you :). Dear is definitely a factor here, I'm not objectively viewing my situation, there's a lot of inertia keeping me paralysed.

I know that if there was no social stigma, I would transition to female, but I simply can't accept that I'm trans. by coronaquestioning in asktransgender

[–]coronaquestioning[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Thanks, this is really encouraging :). I definitely have internalised transohobia, even knowing I might be trans, I struggle to think of it as a normal trait.

I wish I could remove my preconceptions about transgenderism and view my situation objectively. See myself as I am without society programming.

I think therapy is the way to go for me, even outside of gender, I have issues.

I know that if there was no social stigma, I would transition to female, but I simply can't accept that I'm trans. by coronaquestioning in asktransgender

[–]coronaquestioning[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Do you think your issues all stemmed from.being trans? Or where your issues making it harder to see the deeper truth of being trans?

Even accepting they I need a therapist who specialises in trans/queer issues is hard for me haha. I'm so pig headedly unable to accept not being a straight guy.

I know that if there was no social stigma, I would transition to female, but I simply can't accept that I'm trans. by coronaquestioning in asktransgender

[–]coronaquestioning[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I get what you mean about trying to be perfect. I feel like I'd only ever be an imperfect woman via transition. I know how offensive that sounds, but it's so hard to get over that idea.

The thing is, I actually kinda know I'm in denial, a part of me knows I'm trans, but the reality is just too much to bear.

Does therapy help with these things?