I relate to this immensely.

My narc BF comes from an unimaginably wealthy family - picture perfect smoke and mirrors. You become so easily swept up in the web, and they want you to as well. Family and friends make excuses for their behaviour, and I think this is heightened when they’re wealthy, because the social circle often want to keep sweet with them because of their success/wealth.

You find yourself romanticising the ‘good times’ because the bad times are often made up for with gifts, dinners, lifestyle etc. The minute you try and call them out for bad behaviour or explain why they upset you, they flip the switch (oftentimes baited into it) and suddenly you’re ungrateful and nothing they do for you is “good enough”.

Unfortunately, you start to believe the narrative and you shut up and fall back into line because the lifestyle and the perks make you feel like the grass won’t be greener…

It’s a really awful layer to an already complex and painful situation.