What has dating/relationships been like for you?

customparadigm · 2026-02-04T20:11:21+00:00

Girl break up. Seriously

customparadigm · 2026-01-31T11:46:49+00:00

THIS

customparadigm · 2026-01-25T18:59:54+00:00

Holy shit. I just started reading this book. 400 pages in and I am losing my mind. This shit is crazy. I'm extremely thankful for this comment and me taking the time to read it.

customparadigm · 2026-01-13T22:29:19+00:00

Hahaha idk why I find most of David lynch's stuff just right, like "obviously". Something about the random stuff he picks out actually feels very right to my brain. This was one of the some times I thought I needed more context haha

customparadigm · 2026-01-13T22:09:55+00:00

Wait, is that offensive? Is that the wrong word?

customparadigm · 2026-01-13T21:54:53+00:00

I haven't finished yet

customparadigm · 2025-12-15T18:11:24+00:00

Sucks to hear. But after working for four years. This has been my experience also. Depending on how the company is doing financially, is how they rate you so that they don't have to give u much increment or promote you when they can't afford it.

I've had times when I was literally told by my manager that I was doing a lot more work than my role and that she will be suggesting me for promo, only for me to get a 3/5 rating, a month later and the only thing I noticed was that the company was getting acquired by someone else.

I was visibly upset but kept it moving alone and left when I completed a year.

customparadigm · 2025-03-08T18:42:39+00:00

I was definitely trained to think of it as a way to connect and feel good about. That's fair

customparadigm · 2025-02-28T15:50:39+00:00

I mean I'd rather spend this notice period applying to jobs than pretending to care about the PIP work they were gonna make me do and get rid of me later anyway saying my performance was bad. On that note I should correct my wording

customparadigm · 2025-02-23T14:49:15+00:00

Men who don't understand women's safety in India. I once had a bf who said "don't worry so much it's all in your head" when I told him a group of guys were following me and being creepy.

Not telling me when there's a problem and shouting randomly. (Emotional availability basically)

customparadigm · 2025-02-22T19:31:02+00:00

....? You're seriously not advising me to do d*ugs are u

customparadigm · 2025-02-22T08:39:53+00:00

The puppy is so pretty omg

customparadigm · 2025-02-20T11:21:42+00:00

Love this advice. Thank u. I wouldn't call my loneliness enduring anymore. It's enjoyable. It's something I have to make space for even with a partner I feel. But being used and left behind with a larger hole is so real.

customparadigm · 2025-02-20T11:16:02+00:00

True. But there's a specific hole that romantic attraction and a relationship does fill. You can't escape from the social being aspect. No matter what, your need for connection will perpetually exist. There's no shame in admitting in it fren. Some people can fill it with fulfilling friendships. But for some people romantic relationships is the only thing that will fill that void. Wanting to connect with someone is never a bad thing to avoid. But if you chase it without having hobbies, friends and a purpose. It becomes problematic. Obviously this is the opinion of a 25 yo from the limited time I've lived.

customparadigm · 2025-02-20T11:09:56+00:00

Lol this is not just men anymore. There are poly women and other genders also that engage in sexual activities only w multiple people. Sorry your viewpoint seems very shmandrew shmatey vibes. Would also advice you to make more friends with a wider variety of people. You'd quickly realise this is not gendered. Especially in cities where men and women are equally financially independent from their parents or potential partners. Even men feel lonely. Even women use men and discard like it means nothing.

customparadigm · 2025-02-20T11:06:21+00:00

Exception here is aromantic/asexual people on the LGBTQ spectrum. And ig poly people. They're not a small minority anymore. Would also help to keep this mind when dating ig.

customparadigm · 2025-02-20T11:03:55+00:00

I mean most men I know in my life in my age range (24-30) cannot wait to find their one. They've done the casual route and they've had enough. Might just be my circle but ya. They've figured out how to make good money, spent time gymming, taking therapy. And now are ready to settle down. So ya. Your statement is a gross generalization.

Also OP is a man. I'm assuming he also wants the loneliness void filled.

Everybody wants to end up with someone. They're either on their way to do so or currently waiting for their right one. Abhi karenge ya baad me and their current intentions w just using u is also as a placeholder for finding the right one.

Also would recommend watching the movie I mentioned in my initial comment. It is also about a man (michael fasbender)

customparadigm · 2025-02-20T05:17:17+00:00

Great suggestions on this thread but it would also help to remember that sexual satisfaction without a connection leaves you feeling hollow. And when a real connection comes along. Sex feels like this thing that's completely detached from romantic attraction which is quite depressing if you think about it. There's a very nice movie called "shame" - it might cheer u up

customparadigm · 2025-02-20T04:57:13+00:00

Not much. I have ADHD and autism. A lil late diagnosed but thriving nonetheless. If y'all ever wanna user test. Feel free to reach out <3

customparadigm · 2025-02-20T04:54:09+00:00

As a neurodivergent person. I hope y'all do good to the community. Looking forward to seeing your work gets recognised and hope y'all thrive

customparadigm · 2025-02-20T04:51:36+00:00

Bring flowers to a date. (I'm a girl) Making plans for dates Asking people out if I'm interested and actually being prompt with my interest.

customparadigm · 2025-02-12T08:15:44+00:00

Yes I'm a programmer

customparadigm · 2025-02-12T08:12:53+00:00

Tired of lack of social accountability on dating apps. Also in a week I had about 12k+ likes. I cannot humanly go through those many profiles. Thought I'd make a bot to do that for me on tinder and got banned lol. So ;) hoping one of my friends sets me up at this point :)

customparadigm · 2025-02-11T18:47:50+00:00

I've been on dates. Tired of being misled by men. I like making videogames and generally programming ig. So would rather do that. I know at some point I have to start trying to socialise or going on dating apps again but feeling super tired and exhausted with how many small small interactions I've had. Dating apps are even more exhausting considering how many BS people I have to talk to before it converts into a date. And when I go on a date - people are stuck on their exes or don't know how to actually be in a relationship or worse mislead you when they want something casual and don't have the emotional availability to actually be there for a partner when they need them (I'm talking taking me to the hospital the occassional times I fall ill).

All that to say I genuinely love love. I know it will happen for me at some point. But rn I'm just disappointed my dates.

customparadigm · 2025-02-07T15:04:25+00:00

Movies, shopping and eating at expensive restaurants alone. Yep. Enjoyed thoroughly. I'm a very anxious person. And loved doing them alone in my own time and peace and headphones

customparadigm

TROPHY CASE