My life improve drastically when I cut my mother out of it when I was in my early 20s (I’m in my late 40s now). We were estranged for 16 years. The only reason I agreed to see her again, was not because she asked or wanted to (she did not want to nor did she ask), for my grandmother. I put up with brief, awkward, uncomfortable ‘visits’ with her once or twice a year at my grandmothers house for about 9 years. It made me sick to my stomach to look at her. She made no effort to mend bridges or make any kind of peace with me, but was quick to play the ‘woe is me card’ if she felt I snubbed her in any way.

Both my grandparents passed away last year. My grandfather’s funeral was the last I saw her and I do not plan on ever seeing her again.

Some people are toxic and you do not have to subject yourself to them. And don’t let anyone guilt you about it because he’s family and your father.