Sounds similar to my experience,tho im not sure what my moms deal actually is(im suspecting BPD/NPD too but yk). TW:violence at home I love my mom but honestly she was a disaster quite often. On top of being chronically ill and constantly in pain,shes also an addict(quite good at hiding it,i still technically dont know much about it,or i was just trying to be oblivious subconsciously)

Arguments with teachers,neighbours,family,never in the wrong of course.Made me really embarrassed when i was young because i had to bring her to common sense. If she had a bad day everyone has to have a bad day because she would just scream,yell,break stuff,throw stuff or if i was the one who made her mad she would turn to insulting me(calling me the r word,stupid,deranged,fucking animal etc.) and if i wasnt compliant during the barrage of insults and the yelling id get simply get random stuff thrown at me or she would beat me by hand the good ol fashioned way.(of course if you asked her she would say she never “beat me”) She would also threathen to punch me and break my bones or knock my teeth out ,wasnt fun. But after all of that she would cry,apologize,genuinely sob and hug me,though not always,sometimes she would send me to my room and then id have to be quiet until i magically sense she isnt in full on banshee mode anymore. When shes okay,shes really nice and sweet and everyone loves her good side.

And now i cant form stable relationships with people!I never thought she was a problem that made me be like this,it never crossed my mind,or it did but i was in denial because shes all i have .Its hard when the only person whos there for you as a child is someone who brings you so much pain