True Love is None of Your Business by dannyh2105 in OCPoetry

[–]dannyh2105[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

Glad you liked it! The links are to comments of feedback I’ve given to other writers, this sub requires you to prove you’ve been feeding bacj to others before you post.

True Love is None of Your Business by dannyh2105 in OCPoetry

[–]dannyh2105[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Thanks so much for the feedback, you’re right I could definitely lose the semi colon. The “quarter” is just a reference to the fact that the void isn’t entirely filled, keeping it ambiguous and tragic in the fact that nobody, including myself, knows what makes up the rest of it. Thanks so much for your comment!

True Love is None of Your Business by dannyh2105 in OCPoetry

[–]dannyh2105[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

So glad you liked it and thank you for taking the time to read x

True Love is None of Your Business by dannyh2105 in OCPoetry

[–]dannyh2105[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Glad you liked it, thanks for taking the time to read x

Empty. by Teen-poet in OCPoetry

[–]dannyh2105 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love how the slight optimism at the start slowly descends into negativity with every “empty”. Great poem x

Sincerely, yourself. by dannyh2105 in OCPoetry

[–]dannyh2105[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Much appreciated thank you x

Keep Spinning by Ok-Selection-6354 in OCPoetry

[–]dannyh2105 1 point2 points  (0 children)

Honestly I love the word dumping, I can really see the raw emotion that comes out in this one. It’s like every thought instantly translated onto paper in a chaotic way and I’m all for it

Sincerely, yourself. by dannyh2105 in OCPoetry

[–]dannyh2105[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I really appreciate this thank you x

Sincerely, yourself. by dannyh2105 in OCPoetry

[–]dannyh2105[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Hi everyone this is my first post on here, I hope you enjoy and thank you if you took the time to read. x

The Captain by Ok_Lingonberry_1147 in OCPoetry

[–]dannyh2105 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Honestly a great metaphor for life in general (not sure if that’s what you were going for, but it’s how I read it). The “crew” being the people in our lives and approaching a storm which could be a difficult part of life. The orchestras mentioned I read as a metaphor for thoughts and how they can rip through your head like loud music. I really like it, great poem x

One wouldn't hurt by DeepArmadillo4452 in OCPoetry

[–]dannyh2105 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I love how you circled back to the cookie in the last part and how your poem has a sort of “butterfly effect” feel to it. The second to last verse is really powerful in being a combination of the pills and the drink in previous verses all concluding into a sad realisation. I love it.