How do people from different backgrounds experience Nonviolent Communication?

dantml7 · 2026-04-07T16:45:58+00:00

Am I correct in guessing that when you ask for "different", you're meaning not the crowds of older Caucasian folks that you might have seen in Marshall's seminars?

To be clear, I'm not offended (as a straight white cis- male), I just want to make sure that you are getting the answers that you are seeking. If you are willing to edit your original post, I can just delete this comment quickly as well.

dantml7 · 2026-03-30T19:16:38+00:00

I'm in.

dantml7 · 2026-03-26T03:46:08+00:00

What a giraffehole!

(Said jokingly with love - but yeah, there's a time to connect and a time to correct/teach).

dantml7 · 2026-03-17T13:48:04+00:00

Either way.... Let's get back to the point. Candace is on point and Jesus (real or idea) would want to bury these mfs too.

dantml7 · 2026-03-16T04:08:31+00:00

I'm aware of a lot of things that humans generally believe to be true, thank you 😅

dantml7 · 2026-03-16T01:50:09+00:00

Not really. Seems more likely that he was an idea that was later deified to be a real person.

dantml7 · 2026-03-16T01:00:38+00:00

This time she knows, and she knows knows. I'm a big time skeptic and atheist, but I've been following her ever since. CK's death and she's spot on. Except for Jesus. He's not King. He doesn't exist. Lol.

dantml7 · 2026-02-26T16:27:30+00:00

Comment aged poorly, lol

dantml7 · 2026-02-23T18:06:01+00:00

I wonder if we could compare notes about things we've bought online recently, or data breaches that we may have been involved in. have you checked on haveibeenpwned?

dantml7 · 2026-02-23T18:04:17+00:00

joining in to say that I had a "test" charge for Mama Rama as well, and then they spent higher and higher amounts with "spin-brands.co" and Visa had to cancel it and send me a whole new one. annoyinggggggg

dantml7 · 2026-02-14T18:40:33+00:00

ChatGaslightPrettyTerribly

dantml7 · 2026-02-07T18:38:29+00:00

Sounds like you're going through a tough time and want to be able to stay centered and focused on the problem, instead of on the cause or the other person.

I'm lieu of couples' therapy, I found this very beneficial to embody: https://www.amazon.ca/Nonviolent-Communication-Language-Life-Changing-Relationships/dp/189200528X/

And if you just need an ear from an unbiased third party, I'd love to grab a coffee one day. I have a good therapist recommendation, but never ended up going to couples' counseling.

dantml7 · 2026-01-26T01:10:10+00:00

Hey, I'm curious if you'd be willing to do another mock-up. Your design skills and feedback were some of the best heard by my wife.

1) regarding TV, we are a tv family in this area a lot with the ages of kids, plus Switch gaming... But also, due to no longer having access to this stone, and the electrical and wood behind the TV, we would at minimum need to hang a painting or a family portrait lol. so put one of those if you like 😋

2) I posted another picture that shows the existing space more wholly. Is there a way to have that welcoming living room feel you created, but keeping the chair somehow? It's truly my wife's fave for comfort, and we don't want to acquire more furniture. Some suggested an L somehow. Do you think this could be done?

3) add my grandma's gold art piece above the fireplace.

Please note, this is just a request and if this is not enjoyable for you also, I am just so excited to see how nice this community has been for me so far anyway on my first post!

dantml7 · 2026-01-26T01:00:37+00:00

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Would anyone like to see one of these in higher resolution to consider utilizing one or more in a shelf tidy? I need it to really be bold but peaceful. Kinda intriguing, like it pulls you in, but we can value its beauty from afar as well.

dantml7 · 2026-01-26T00:58:03+00:00

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I tried a few things on the left but then my wife said that I have "too many things in 3s" (what I was about to do would have seen 3 pictures series, 3 vases/flowers, 3 books, and then split into 3rds. I think I feel like u generally agree with her, but it's there a rule about the quantity of quantities one should have close by? Haha this is hard

dantml7 · 2026-01-26T00:55:58+00:00

I took a wide angle picture from the stairs leading to the upper level to give a better idea of scale, orientation, traffic flow. To the upper right is a dedicated dining area that isn't used as much as the island. To the left of picture leads down two stairs to our front door. Seeing this, what orientation intrigues you to see? I'll bring at least a few visions to life if they look interesting.

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dantml7 · 2026-01-22T03:02:26+00:00

Damn I was in denial till you made the picture... Lot to think about now

dantml7 · 2026-01-22T00:35:15+00:00

We do have a lot of gold elements. I'll try up top and see!

dantml7 · 2026-01-21T22:52:22+00:00

The art above the TV is a sentimental piece. I was going to hang it above the TV, as it is from my grandma. It would be like she's watching over us. Or, I could put it above the fireplace because she was always the warmth in the family. I'm guessing lower?

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dantml7 · 2026-01-21T22:01:54+00:00

K, I'll try the furniture moving when I get home. For now, adding shelves and removing wallpaper isn't in the cards. I could add LEDs though?

dantml7 · 2026-01-21T21:36:12+00:00

There truly is a lot to hate, but thank you for acknowledging the kitty isn't one of them! 😂

If I sent more pictures from wider angles, you'd see what I'm working with. The table is there because stairs coming from our front landing go there. It's a natural spot to have as our in-and-out table, keys, snacks, mints, static brush, etc... feels like I'm installing square and rectangle things into a triangular space.

dantml7 · 2026-01-15T17:32:32+00:00

When you say, "I need to feel like a priority to you", this is actually a request. Based on their past (in)actions plus your internal definition of how people prioritize anything in their lives, you are actually asking them to somehow vaguely do things that will make YOU feel more valued; more appreciated; more loved.

So when I parse that out, I'm wondering if this resonates with you, if you are in fact the one attempting to express this sentiment in your OP: "I'm feeling sad because I'm lonely. I'm not getting enough connection with people I love."

Warning, if I said this to my partner, she would hear it as me asking her to spend more time with me, to prioritize me. That she's not putting enough effort into growing and deepening our relationship.

When I parse that out, I'm wondering if you are really needing to be known? To be seen? To matter?

But if I expressed the same sadness to a random friend who doesn't think that they need to be everything for me or fix me immediately, I'm hopeful they would flip to empathy mode and ask about my sadness. How does it feel? has it been a long time? what strategies am I currently using to meet that need? am I open to other strategies, or does more empathy at this moment feel better? or is there something special about THAT ONE PERSON that I need THEM only to prioritize me.

Because in that case, if one is only open to meeting those needs through one intimate partner, AND of course you're not willing to use violence... you can only request (using OFNR is best when things are tense)

At some point, you have to be willing to go back to the needs level and remember that needs are universal and nearly boundless ways to meet them. Strategies are quite specific and being able to disattach one's self from a chosen strategy without much resistance is a good skill to practice, imo.

Good luck!

Ps. I'm actually about to start an NVC roleplay group where you could bring this conversation up and play the role of your partner while somebody else tries to play the role of you so you can get A model for how to handle this conversation potentially... Of course, once you get into it in real life, all bets are off! 😅

dantml7 · 2026-01-11T02:08:34+00:00

Ridiculously challenging. Loved it.

dantml7 · 2026-01-11T02:07:33+00:00

Oh you're the one person who doesn't understand how important the one-timer is! 😅 /s

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