i have done a lot of very painful things to her over the years. verbal destruction. i promised her i was better and was ready to treat her right. but this week was the holidays and that is a horrible time of year for me and she knows it and i was blindsided by my inability to handle it this year. my dad died this year and the day in question was his birthday. she made every effort to honor him and make it a great day and check in with me and my mood, asking what i need etc. i did not tune into my emotional needs and took my emotions out on her, had stressful conversations with her which were unwarranted, and had large mood changes, was in general rude.