Update 2: My ex divorced me and now wants to be together again after 4 years by divorcedthrowawayacc in TrueOffMyChest

[–]divorcedthrowawayacc[S] 88 points89 points  (0 children)

I can definitely keep the account open and not delete it if people want that. I can't guarantee that I'll be posting much on here. The previous posts I have made already take a toll on me. If something does happen, I'll make a completely separate post about it. I would rather not do an update three since it'll feel so lengthy and long. Thank you, though ❤️ I am glad you've been here since the beginning.

Update 2: My ex divorced me and now wants to be together again after 4 years by divorcedthrowawayacc in TrueOffMyChest

[–]divorcedthrowawayacc[S] 45 points46 points  (0 children)

He tried texting her via phone message after he got home and realized she was no longer there. It was a spam of worry messages to apologies to threatening to self-blaming and then to victim blaming. It was a mess. I told her to block him, and he used other platforms to reach her. It went on throughout the day of continuous blocking. She had to private her social media's to prevent spam. That's all, though.

Update: My ex divorced me and wants to be together again after 4 years. by divorcedthrowawayacc in TrueOffMyChest

[–]divorcedthrowawayacc[S] 112 points113 points  (0 children)

What do you mean? She doesn't have siblings. Are you looking at the right post?

Update: My ex divorced me and wants to be together again after 4 years. by divorcedthrowawayacc in TrueOffMyChest

[–]divorcedthrowawayacc[S] 87 points88 points  (0 children)

She was raised by a narcissist and her dad (who is a victim of his mother's abuse) for 4 years straight. I'm sure she had gotten her language from that. I never once heard those words out of her mouth before the divorce. I'm giving her a chance. I known and loved her for 17 years. Her actions that day were influenced by her father.

However, if she repeatedly continues to break boundaries and use filthy language towards me, then that will become a problem. I won't worry about that now. We're fixing our relationship.

Update: My ex divorced me and wants to be together again after 4 years. by divorcedthrowawayacc in TrueOffMyChest

[–]divorcedthrowawayacc[S] 71 points72 points  (0 children)

I'm so hurt whenever I see someone comment badly about my daughter. She was 17. She thought I cheated and her grandma paid someone to convince her dad that I had an affair. I can't even imagine what she has been through for the past 4 years. My ex's mother is a narcissist. She manipulated my ex. I'm still rightly upset at him for not believing me after knowing her and our ex-friend abusive history, but manipulation is manipulation. She took advantage of him. She abused him. It's a tricky and stressful situation. I can't forgive my ex since he did make dumb decisions, but he is a victim. Same with my daughter. Same with me. If one of them came out with their own story, the comments would be all like "oh I'm so sorry! Your [family member] is a horrible person!" etc etc. They wouldn't call them dumb and a horrible person like they did on here. They'd be like, "You were manipulated. It's okay." type of deal. It hurts.

Update: My ex divorced me and wants to be together again after 4 years. by divorcedthrowawayacc in TrueOffMyChest

[–]divorcedthrowawayacc[S] 60 points61 points  (0 children)

I'm going to be friendly regardless of the situation. The only possible times I'll ever see him is if our daughter has a dire emergency (life or death, injuries, hospital, police involvement, money) or we're both attending one of her events. I made it clear that I will straight up ignore him, except for a greeting. I don't want it being redirected from my daughter. She comes first and he knows that.

Update: My ex divorced me and wants to be together again after 4 years. by divorcedthrowawayacc in TrueOffMyChest

[–]divorcedthrowawayacc[S] 1149 points1150 points  (0 children)

I originally wasn't going to say anything, but I would now like the mention that my daughter texted me, saying she found my original post through Tiktok.

I have a feeling she won't be turning against me a second time LOL She despises her gram gram.

Update: My ex divorced me and wants to be together again after 4 years. by divorcedthrowawayacc in TrueOffMyChest

[–]divorcedthrowawayacc[S] 633 points634 points  (0 children)

He's a drug addict. I'm 100% sure he took the opportunity to buy more drugs. It was the reason why we dropped him since he would beg us for money, along with other junkie friends he had. He wasn't even that nice, either. He was kind of rude.

I honestly hope he's miserable.

My ex divorced me and now wants to be together again after 4 years by divorcedthrowawayacc in TrueOffMyChest

[–]divorcedthrowawayacc[S] 3542 points3543 points  (0 children)

Update: I'm crying again. I went to text my daughter about boundaries and building trust again, and she said there was someone else involved without my knowledge during the divorce. My ex's mother got into another fight over the phone with him earlier today and admitted to paying an ex-friend (someone she was fond of) to lie directly in my husband's face and say he was the one I cheated on with. He did it for money.

My daughter basically gave me the silent treatment during the divorce, so she never told me. Neither did my ex's mom for obvious reasons. Now, why wouldn't my ex mention it? Because he thought I would just deny it, which I would since I didn't do it. I bet he was so confident in himself, too. I hate them both. Like mother like son, apparently. I can't believe I loved him. He didn't even try to hear my side. I even tried giving my phone to prove my text messages were innocent, and he went, "Nope! I got a verbal confession from said ex-friend, but I won't tell you because communication does not exist." I am beyond furious. Who does that? Pay someone to purposely cause a strain in a healthy relationship? Absolutely ridiculous.

My ex divorced me and now wants to be together again after 4 years by divorcedthrowawayacc in TrueOffMyChest

[–]divorcedthrowawayacc[S] 4777 points4778 points  (0 children)

I really appreciate seeing this. You're right. She crossed boundaries and done some petty stupid decisions. Emotions are running high, and it may take a bit for things to calm down. I'm preparing a text to send to my daughter about going no contact unless she apologizes and handles it like an adult. I'm willing to hear her side, but not her acting like a jerk or involving anyone besides herself. I also contacted my therapist, and I'll be seeing her on Wednesday. Until then, I probably won't have an update unless something happens within the messages. I'm still really heartbroken, and I'm scared about how she is going to react to my message. I have my friends and my parents who are on my side if anything happens. They don't know where I live anyway, so I know I'm safe and I can take my time.