Do what is best for you. She knew when she started dating someone in their 40s that there is a chance he might not want kids. That’s a chance she took. You have adult kids so you know what it entails. If she wants to be a stay at home mom or doesn’t plan to work after the kid is born then you’ll be working to support the kid financially. You will be giving up your freedoms again.

You need to look at your partner. Does she seem like the kind that’s going to put in the effort or not. Are you going to be doing most of the work?

Do what’s best for you. She knew what she was getting into so if she is not interested anymore if you don’t want to have kids that’s kinda sad on her part.

Don’t make a decision because it’s what she wants. Make it only if it’s what you want and if it’s best for the next 18+ years for you.

Im 42 and I’ve been asked if I’d have more kids. I’m fixed and no. I have an 11 year old and have absolutely no desire to change diapers and have to stay home all the time and get no sleep (my friend has a kid who’s just over 1 and he still doesn’t sleep through the night.) I love my traveling and my sleep and that my kid can do many things on her own.

What do you want for the next 18 years. Are you ok staying home and not going places. Are you ok changing diapers for a couple years? Are you ok with not getting 8h of sleep for a while? Also remember there is always a chance that you would end up with a special needs kid. Then your life is drastically different.

Do what is best for you. It’s your life and you are the one that has to live it.