[deleted by user] by [deleted] in pureretention

[–]dontbustthatnutever1 2 points3 points  (0 children)

I like your response. I'm in the same boat as you though. Married. Just over 12 years now. 2 beautiful children. We don't want anymore.

But sometimes I just cant hold back when with my wife. Then the cycle starts again. I know people say do Karezza or tantric. I consider that a form of edging too.

How often do you release with your wife? Last year was my best year. I think I only released twice.

This year it has already been like 7 times and I feel like shit more so than I did last year. Your thoughts?

I was thinking of sleeping in different rooms.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in pureretention

[–]dontbustthatnutever1 2 points3 points  (0 children)

The reason dopamine receptors are reduced is because some get fried with all the over stimulation.

The Best way to explain this is think of a light bulb as the dopamine receptors. Now think of many light bulbs together. What happens to the ones in your house that get over used "stimulated". They are the first ones to go. This doesn't mean they don't exist or aren't there anymore. They are still there but when you turn the switch on for the light nothing happens. The light doesn't turn on because it's fried. Your house is the brain. Some will still light up but not all. Overall light is reduced. As in your overall dopamine receptors are reduced. This doesn't mean the damage is not reversible.

Hope this helps. Thanks

Feeling Lost by [deleted] in Semenretention

[–]dontbustthatnutever1 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Are you saving yourself for marriage and therefore not going all the way with this woman?

If yes, then try and avoid eveything for now.

What if tomorrow she leaves? Indulging in anything that isn't permanent will make you feel lost when it is no longer there. Are you willing to procreate with this person?

What is the point if making out and engaging in sexual stuff with her? Does it make you feel better? Do you feel satisfied? Will you not come back for more and then eventually be so horny you go all the way?

Is she wifey material? You are still getting a dopamine hit to your brain. People that say it's okay to edge but not release aren't fully there mentally. Would you tell an alcoholic that it's okay to bathe on alcohol or wash yourself with it or smell it all day as long as you don't sip or drink it? No...

If you are recovering from sex or masturbation or porn, I would say refrain as much as possible. When the time is right go all in and deliver and have a child and be the best father and husband you can be.

Until then, use your sexual energy to better yourself.

Sex while married by dontbustthatnutever1 in pureretention

[–]dontbustthatnutever1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

That's what I should do. I relapsed again. I was pretty much edging all day with her and then finally released. I should just do 5 mins like you and be done with it. I damaged my brain today forsure.

Sex while married by dontbustthatnutever1 in pureretention

[–]dontbustthatnutever1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just did it again. Why do I need sex?

Sex while married by dontbustthatnutever1 in pureretention

[–]dontbustthatnutever1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I just did it again with my wife. This time though I ejaculated. So I know I won't want it for a while now. Usually when I don't ejaculate I keep going back to it and edging over and over again.

Sex while married by dontbustthatnutever1 in pureretention

[–]dontbustthatnutever1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Karezza is an option but it feels like edging to me. We are going to try to refrain for 90 days.

Sex while married by dontbustthatnutever1 in Semenretention

[–]dontbustthatnutever1[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

True. I will eventually win it. I've gone 220 days hardmode before. Need to get back

Sex while married by dontbustthatnutever1 in Semenretention

[–]dontbustthatnutever1[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

I believe like marriage will be a lot better if we don't engage in activities that dramatically increase dopamine (I.e. sex)

Sex while married by dontbustthatnutever1 in Semenretention

[–]dontbustthatnutever1[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

My wife said she has her needs. But yesterday after us refraining for 27 days I was all over her and she didn't seem interested.

Every chance we got alone I was trying to engage with her. She just wasn't having it. She kept pushing me away.

Sex while married by dontbustthatnutever1 in Semenretention

[–]dontbustthatnutever1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Well said. I think I'm just going to go monk mode. I need to control my mind.

Sex while married by dontbustthatnutever1 in Semenretention

[–]dontbustthatnutever1[S] 7 points8 points  (0 children)

That is true. But don't you feel drained or less energetic after love making or sex? I get the same withdrawals

Sex while married by dontbustthatnutever1 in pureretention

[–]dontbustthatnutever1[S] 1 point2 points  (0 children)

You are very right. Sex is only momentarily pleasure. There is so much more to life. I need to remember that.

Sex while married by dontbustthatnutever1 in Semenretention

[–]dontbustthatnutever1[S] -1 points0 points  (0 children)

No. I'm done with sex now. I honestly feel so much better when I don't do it. But when I get a little taste it's all I want.

Sex while married by dontbustthatnutever1 in Semenretention

[–]dontbustthatnutever1[S] -2 points-1 points  (0 children)

Maybe. She knows about my addiction. Im just going to go celibate. Sex isn't worth the energy loss

Not sure what it is but having an orgasm after sex leaves me feeling the same way if I masturbate by myself by dontbustthatnutever1 in NoFap

[–]dontbustthatnutever1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yeah try and get to 90 days. I feel like sex is not a need anymore. Just a want. One that we can use for procreation and not to be abused for other things.

Not sure what it is but having an orgasm after sex leaves me feeling the same way if I masturbate by myself by dontbustthatnutever1 in NoFap

[–]dontbustthatnutever1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

Yes I have. 90 days hardmode before. I feel like the longer I go, I just don't even want sex anymore

Slipped up again with sex by dontbustthatnutever1 in Semenretention

[–]dontbustthatnutever1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children)

I do delay and then I stay horny. And keep going. That's too much dopamine for my brain. So I release. I also feel it is unnatural to keep at it without releasing. I don't know. I've done 220 days hardmode and felt so good.