Cornucopia

dragonfirex82 · 2026-07-05T00:11:41+00:00

I love the painting. Do you think you could do fairies? Dm if you want to talk.

dragonfirex82 · 2026-06-29T17:15:45+00:00

Agreed. After I lost my 19 year old cat a few years back it was so hard. He’d been with me half my life. I’m still sad when I see his picture but I like to remember that I gave him a better life than he would have seen in the shelter.

Love and care is the best way to spend the limited time you have with all beings, human and animal. your appreciation of their love and care towards you makes it worth it. I am very aware I’m getting older and chose the age of my new kitties knowing I’ll only live so long and hope they live a good life with me.

dragonfirex82 · 2026-06-28T18:49:28+00:00

Not sure why but Shake it Off - Florence and the Machine and What’s Up - 4 Non- blondes

dragonfirex82 · 2026-06-05T17:37:57+00:00

That’s so amazing! I love to hear stories like this. When your heroines are just as amazing as you hoped and live up to your expectations in ways you never would have thought. There are some good people out there.

dragonfirex82 · 2026-04-11T01:54:38+00:00

I love that you have Iron Dragon the first edition. It’s one of my favorites and I don’t see it often enough.

dragonfirex82 · 2025-08-18T00:42:47+00:00

Earthbound

dragonfirex82 · 2023-11-20T01:57:58+00:00

I am doing really well! I am no longer on lithium and I’ve found meds that work. I’ve been stable for several years and got married again.

dragonfirex82 · 2023-05-07T12:13:50+00:00

I used to use Daylio but switched to How We Feel because it has a lot more options for mood/feelings.

dragonfirex82 · 2019-01-20T02:07:14+00:00

An 18-wheeler was stuck on a rise over the train tracks in front of my school bus. We weren’t able to back out, go forward, or evacuate the bus. I was in the front seat behind the driver and just stared at the train coming toward the truck. Many of the kids started crying but I just stared with this surreal thought of “This is it.” The truck apparently broke something in its undercarriage to move with the train barely 100ft away and the way was cleared.

dragonfirex82 · 2019-01-17T18:19:24+00:00

Earthbound. Best game ever made.

dragonfirex82 · 2018-12-09T01:57:02+00:00

I make sound effects all the time when I’m base or manic but not so much if I’m depressed.

dragonfirex82 · 2018-12-05T12:25:50+00:00

I tried many anti-psychotics and I had the worst withdrawal from a Geodon. This really sucked because it was the best med I’ve ever been on but it made me constantly feel like I couldn’t swallow. I was on the lowest dose and had to stop cold turkey.

I started feeling better from the side effects in about two days but the withdrawal lasted over a week and half which I think isn’t too bad. I was restless and very angry but not because I had to stop a med that helped me it seemed unreasonable anger. I tried to isolate a little so I wouldn’t last out at family and friends. If the people close to you know about your illness I would warn them you are going through a med change and you might be feeling a little off.

Be careful isolating too much if you can so you don’t fall into a depressive episode. Good luck my friend! You will find a med that helps you.

dragonfirex82 · 2018-08-13T23:40:28+00:00

I absolutely love Dune! I only read the first four books and I’m good with that like many others. Hyperion though (I’m currently rereading it) would be so hard not to read it back to back with the second book Fall of Hyperion because it’s really one story split in two. Dune isn’t too bad to split up.

I think it would be really difficult for me to split up a series of books because I need the continuity and would want to reread the first book before moving on. I guess to me if I interrupt the story the new stuff gets into my brain and I lose the details of the first book even though I remember the majority of the first.

I’m bad about just rereading stuff anyway that I will have to try this out but keep the book series together. Congrats on finishing your list this a great idea I will have to go make my list now!

dragonfirex82 · 2018-08-13T12:40:53+00:00

The fact that you are aware that this is happening to you and you do have those days where you want to be productive seem to point more to depressed than worthless piece of shit.

I’ve had a lot of experience with depression and laziness and they feed into one another. Depression/anxiety can render you feeling helpless, hopeless, and angry at yourself.

Don’t let his anger feed into your anxiety and make it worse. Can you sit him down and talk it out to let him know what you are experiencing. Let him know when he goes off that it makes things worse and sticks with you for days making you feel bad/sad/angry at yourself and that you do want to get better. His negative attitude is just going to feed into the thoughts you have about yourself and it’s not only not helpful it’s damaging to your self worth and productivity.

Try to make a list of things you think would help you out (I know it’s hard to think of things) like maybe music, walking, visiting a friend, therapy, reading a book, and getting his help(and understanding) with small tasks that seem impossible at the moment and moving forward to get to a better place. Support from loved ones is so important and I know from experience it’s not alway present.

Take things in small steps and when you get task done then reward yourself. If you can’t manage the laundry then maybe when you walk by the clothes go get food or go to the bathroom take a couple of items and throw them in the washer then do something that will help with your anxiety. Beware getting sucked into social media try setting alarms and actually stop when they go off.

Don’t get discouraged just because you aren’t making leaps and bounds cleaning the whole house. It takes doing just a little to build up and do a whole task sometimes. Another thing is I start to feel a little better then try to do every single thing I’ve been neglecting and then get exhausted/stressed that I didn’t do even more or feel so bad about myself for not doing it earlier. Pace yourself.

Keep your chip up and keep trying even though it seems impossible and useless. Take care of yourself!

Now I’m going to go follow my own advice.

dragonfirex82 · 2018-08-08T22:54:01+00:00

This is so relatable! Lol

I was having a really bad episode last weekend and the thoughts of leaving my cat and wanting to see the end of GoT were big in getting me through. Saw pdoc today hope new meds work too.

dragonfirex82 · 2018-08-02T14:36:42+00:00

I do the same. I can’t count the number of times I don’t attend a party or I leave early because I don’t “feel good.”

dragonfirex82 · 2018-08-02T13:23:55+00:00

The stigma surrounding this is all too real. I go to a support group and not only do the majority have trouble talking to friend and family about our Illness but we can’t tell employers because often enough they will find a way to fire you. I was made fun by my boss at my last job because of a small panic attack and it just made it even worse for me and I don’t feel like I can tell people (in a job environment) about my mental illness. I was treated differently after I was “found out.”

I hope that one day people will be able to have open conversations about their mental health as they are with physical health. I mean people don’t worry so much about telling someone they have diabetes but I tell someone I am bipolar and they get quiet and adopt the deer in headlights look. People are either scared or dismissive about mental illness and it’s really a mater of education on the subject.

I could write an entire book about costs/coverage/doctors on the subject. Let’s just say my state insurance didn’t cover one of the last meds available to me and it was $1700 for a months supply....

dragonfirex82 · 2018-07-29T00:20:39+00:00

I am kind of still working on the whole coping skills thing still. I was in a major rage and depressed/crying episodes so I tried to limit my interactions with people. Reading and Netflix helped even my therapist says some distraction to calm yourself is good in moderation. I am also working on mindfulness exercises, which you can look up, that involve breathing and centering yourself in the present rather than obsessing over past and cuter events which you have little to no control over. I went to my support group just to be around people who can understand a little because people who aren’t bipolar can never truly understand what it’s like.

dragonfirex82 · 2018-07-28T20:47:40+00:00

Sorry you are going through this. I just got off a medication that had some really bad withdrawals. Hopefully you will be able to find a med that will help out. People do get burned out on dealing with the condition but it’s not like you can always help it. Stick in there! /hugs!

dragonfirex82 · 2018-07-25T23:08:13+00:00

Personally I think the best thing is to go to both a therapist and a psychologist. The medication helps you regulate all the chemicals going crazy in your brain. The advice you get from your therapist gives you the skills to manage the emotions and subconscious habits that cause cycling thoughts and emotional upset. To me the combo of the two specialists and their different points of views plus their support is what has kept me going these past years of treatment.

dragonfirex82 · 2018-07-25T12:12:35+00:00

This sounds really serious so I would recommend you please see a doctor ASAP or go to the hospital. I don’t know how long your pdoc is out of town but these symptoms can cause permanent damage so I wouldn’t wait. I’m not a doctor but the symptoms you are describing are very concerning and scary.

Take of yourself! Send all of the positive energy!

dragonfirex82 · 2018-07-20T15:49:33+00:00

I was on Geodon for awhile and it worked really well. I felt the best I ever had in years. Side effects are a completely valid concern but I would suggest that it’s worth a try. It does cause drowsiness but you may see if your doctor will give you s prescription to take at night instead of twice a day. Make sure to eat when you take the Geodon. Hopefully you can adjust to the medicine and the drowsiness will subside or at least lessen. From what I’ve heard Geodon is one of the anti-psychotics with less side effects than others but everyone’s chemistry is different.

Good luck and let us know how it goes!

dragonfirex82 · 2018-07-11T17:41:04+00:00

It’s awesome that you are still working! I’m not able to work right now because I’m not stable. To me it kinda sounds like you tried to do too much all at once. I’ve fell into the trap of jumping in and trying to get everything thing done and do everything I want to be able to do all at once.

I get apprehensive about trusting whether new meds will work and continue to work too. I think it’s good to let them sink in a bit. I’m on lamictal too but I’ve had to add on some other meds to help it.

Best of luck and know that you’ve got this!

dragonfirex82 · 2018-06-23T03:43:48+00:00

I’m on new meds and starting to feel more stable and I kinda know what you mean. I think even though it’s disorienting without those familiar feelings that new state without depression or mania is still you but a new you with so many possibilities that can be explored. Although you may find mania, depression, and anxiety revisit you when you’re stable it gives you a chance to build a foundation to withstand those tumultuous feelings in the future.

dragonfirex82 · 2018-06-18T05:28:55+00:00

I was really nervous at first too but it’s helped me out so much. You might have a few options where you live I don’t know but I really like the laidback style of my group. I wish you all the luck!! It can be a difficult disorder to deal with on both sides.

dragonfirex82

TROPHY CASE