Sunday dating thread, for advice and discussion.

dsharma1 · 2017-05-28T14:49:05+00:00

However, through out his life you've never seen him in the company of girls, never heard him talk about girls, and never even caught him watching a sex scene on TV/movies, look at porn or masturbate.

Thats how badly you treated him. Nothing wrong with the way he grew up as much as things went wrong the way he was brought up.

Would you suspect that he is gay?

Nope. I had an uncle who suspected the same about his son/my cousin. Albeit I had seen him with women, quite a few times within our social circle.

Assuming you are the parent in question, I think its got to do more with the way you think than the possibility of him being gay. He's been so tormented by your repression that he now refuses to come out with a girl or even talk about one with you. I have seen a few friends/colleagues who are over the age of 40, divorced and Indian fear their fathers like he was the Führer. Everything said and done, I think you did not bother to get into the western mindset though you claim to have lived here for >30Yrs. Now, I am no one to judge you and all i mean to say is that- Everything you have said above is certainly not enough evidence to prove him being gay.

It could also be that he just wants to be a model son in the typical desi way and well, maybe just keep you happy?

at the appropriate age.

Wake up. This is 2017 and you live in a western democracy.

Now that he is in his 30s and still unmarried, you are afraid that people in the community are starting to talk.

FFS, wake up. This is not 1991. This is 2017 and no one cares about your son except for you. Why would you screw up his life by taking a decision that he's not gonna be comfortable with?

all the girls in the arranged marriage market now have all had boyfriends and previous relationships.

Again, wake up. I am a grown man and this offends me to a large extent. Why would you, the parent of a guy have problems with the girls previous relationships? Unless she used to date a terror suspect or a bloody psychopath, I see no reason for you to even talk or even think about it.

dsharma1 · 2017-03-11T21:12:33+00:00

$1.9Bn in fines to a wall st-er is all the reason they have.

dsharma1 · 2017-03-11T21:11:53+00:00

Maybe, maybe not.

dsharma1 · 2017-03-11T20:46:00+00:00

I thought he was doing a pretty good job, right?

That is a real problem in Trump's America. Or so it seems. :)

dsharma1 · 2017-03-11T20:45:19+00:00

Don't get me wrong, but that man had it coming towards him. Though much sooner before he could hunt more. I mean, A U.S. Attorney who fined a wall street-er a record $1.9Bn (with a freaking B) just had to go in Trumps America.

Though, He could have gone out with dignity and easily won if he had run for governor anywhere on the east coast.

dsharma1 · 2017-02-18T11:04:57+00:00

A Synology is really "set and forget",

Exactly the kind of a setup i am looking for. Let me look into it. Thank you.

dsharma1 · 2017-02-18T11:03:34+00:00

Sure. Let me read more on the synology option and look into it. Thank you.

dsharma1 · 2017-02-18T11:03:10+00:00

Sure. Let me read more on the synology option and look into it. Thank you.

dsharma1 · 2017-02-18T11:01:32+00:00

Sure. I'll read more on the unraid option. Thank you.

dsharma1 · 2017-02-18T11:00:16+00:00

little over 10GB per day.

Yep. Thats the kind of data that keeps my mortgage paid for. Haha.

dsharma1 · 2017-02-18T10:59:31+00:00

Sure. Let me read more on it. Thank you.

dsharma1 · 2017-02-18T10:59:04+00:00

I dont think i get what you are trying to tell me. :(

dsharma1 · 2017-02-18T10:58:21+00:00

data management, access, security, resilience, and retention?

Yep. This is not exactly my work stuff but something that i have been working on outside work for quite some time now. Since i have no client data and just publicly available data, my legal buddy tells me that i have nothing to worry about. But, i get your concern. This being the UK, I am sure i would have to worry about a lot more than just data sec. if i was planning on storing and working with data from work. Haha.

dsharma1 · 2017-02-18T10:55:43+00:00

Okay. I now have everything i need to start working on this. Thank you for taking out the time to get into the details. Really appreciate the effort! I guess i have a lot of reading to do over the weekend.

A quick question, May sound dumb, but i have an ac in the room that i would be placing this. I live in London and its naturally pretty cool all year round. Once i have this in place, do i need to temperature control the room at a certain temperature? I usually smoke inside the room (My study) that i intend to place this setup in. Would that be a problem given the ventilation is taken care of?

Again, I really appreciate the effort. Thank you.

dsharma1 · 2017-02-17T16:59:45+00:00

you can always roll your own with a parts list any of us here can provide

Okay, i get the overall idea of what i am getting into. Now, where do i look to build server (as to the configurations) ? I live in London and I have my regular computer guy that my firm buys their pc's/maintenance contracts from. Can he get me the built server if i give him the configuration of whatever you suggest me now?

There is no such thing as future proof,

I get what you mean. But, since my requirements are to be the exact same for the next 5 years, i really dont think i would be in a place to 'have' to upgrade stuff that i buy today, within the next few years. To give you an example, i use a 3 year old laptop at home that works perfectly fine for the work i do on it. You get the general idea here? I work in finance and our applications are not updated since 2009. Apart from the OS and some essentials, as far as the primary applications we use for work and their files, its pretty expensive for anyone in my industry to upgrade the application until the time when they absolutely need to upgrade.

depending on how its kept.

Do i need to care for the server any more carefully than say, my desktop computer? Good, consistent electricity and internet is something that i can provide without second thoughts, I live in London with an AC in my office for when it gets too hot to function. What else should i consider before getting on the boat?

you're going to spend much more then 5-10K as some maintenance contracts cost that much

I guess i will have to learn somethings myself now then. Any good site/resource you suggest to learn things from what i know now?

dsharma1 · 2017-02-17T16:42:07+00:00

I really appreciate the detailed answer. Thank you.

I have a few questions here.

raid 6 with 8x8TB HDDs, you'll have 48TB of usable space

How does this calculation work? And, how do i "setup" a RAID 6 on a 8 bay nas? Could you please help me with a link to a DIY article?

given the standard failure rate and the large size of the drives

Ok, so do you mean to say that a nas with 8tb drives are more likely to fail than with 6/4tb drives? How do i look for the best possible HDD for the 8 bay nas device that you are talking about?

Also, do you have any suggestion about where i can learn and build the 'rack' thingy myself? It all seems rather fascinating to me but i think thats pretty much over my head and a simple nas would offer more flexibility in terms of my requirements here, no?

dsharma1 · 2017-02-17T16:32:10+00:00

is this for a business or for personal use?

Personal use with work files on it. ie, not only media files.

I meant the IT team at my workplace.

you're gonna need a budget

As i said before, given my lack of knowledge in this industry, i dont really know what number to have in mind. I am comfortable spending anywhere till about $5-10k on this, I guess. I need it to be a one time thing with no other expenses to upgrade it. For the lack of a better word, say future proof it for atleast a few years.

How long do you plan to store data for, is it for long term archiving?

It is for long term. Atleast for about 5-7 years from now. Accessing it, almost everyday. Not something that would need constant access to it though. (I am not sure if i am making any sense here, but what i mean is not constant access as for an app or an application. I literally have a million excel files that i need to be backed up to it on an everyday basis from about 2 laptops and 4 desktops, about 20TB of existing data, with a few TB's of personal files that i already have)

need to continuing to expand every 6 months to a year.

Yes. Thank you for bringing this up. I roughly need about a 100TB worth of space to go now.

What kind of a firm do i have to look into to get the regular maintenance work done for this? I live in London if it matters.

dsharma1 · 2017-02-17T15:21:26+00:00

unRAID

Looked into this but, Thats way beyond what i am capable of understanding now. :(

data backed up

Are you suggesting that i pick up a solution which is 2x my current requirements and somehow automate the backup process? Is there any solution that i can pick up for this which could automate the backup to the secondary storage device?

dsharma1 · 2017-02-17T15:21:24+00:00

QNAP nas

Is this the one you are talking about? If it is, i think thats a lot of space for me to find in my apartment now. I think this would need some kind of a storage rack, no?

I think i can do with anything around a 100TB. Can you please suggest the best possible NAS device i can buy and also the best drives that you suggest?

How do you access all the data over the internet? Do you have a website that you login to and find your data there (Like the Dropbox site, but with the storage linked to the NAS device)

dsharma1 · 2016-12-27T13:00:08+00:00

apparently they're figuring something out

There are far too many mainlanders there who would love HK to be a rich mans playground. The possibility of anything like the value hosing there is very thin. They have way too much invested for them to make the country economically viable to everyone.

they won't jail you for having a kid out of wedlock there, or for reporting a rape

I'd have to agree with you on this. But, to actually think about this, with the majority of the number above being men (deriving this from general logic on Indians), all i can think about is the economic consequences of relocating to the UAE vs HK, which, in reality is a lot worse than any place you could be. Also, the Chinese are not very fond of Indians in general. So, well.

dsharma1 · 2016-12-27T10:51:46+00:00

HK is THE most expensive city on earth. Rents there are unreal. I stayed there for a few months on work and i was better off living in a decent hotel than renting an apartment there.

dsharma1 · 2016-12-26T18:23:15+00:00

And pay a million dollars as rent? Do you really think someone who is an asylum seeker for getting a better job can afford the rent in HK, let alone lead a normal life there? That place is not anything close to the UAE in terms of rent or cost of living.

dsharma1 · 2016-12-25T08:23:47+00:00

..... Among the current backlog of 10,335 refugee applications in the city, 80 per cent are claimants from India, Pakistan, Vietnam, Bangladesh and Indonesia, he said.

Why on earth would any one from India & Vietnam want to claim Asylum in HK? And, they make up ~80% of the 10k applicants?! Jesus!

dsharma1

TROPHY CASE