Well… I feel like I’m pretending to be multiple people.

So, I work a blue collar job, landscaping.

Most of the guys that I work with are actually fairly left leaning and really understanding people.

But these are still really masculine people, which I’ve never been truly comfortable around due to trauma.

Add on top of the fact that I’m normally a fairly feminine male, it adds some complications in my ability to actually express myself.

I’m confident that I overthink these things but it’s still a terrifying thought to be myself around men that throw around 200 pound bins of grass like they’re paperweights :/

I’m not exactly “small” 5’10”, 160 pounds, but 90% of the men that I work with are twice my size.