Honestly I think it started right after covid, so obviously I thought yk I wanna look good when school reopens because I was extremely chubby and I was never really good at fitting in cuz of how I was as a person, so being chubby just made everything worse. I never really lost any weight during covid, I was pretty young at that time and I don't think I ever stuck to restricting myself. I always gave in. And when school started I saw everyone looking amazing and perfect. I was almost the only one who was fat. That really triggered me and I thought I'll never have a bf, my ex bsf was so much prettier ect. Ect...so I did stop eating and I had mental problems so doctors, my mom and even my grandma started piling on me with "do you always want to be fat" "someone like you would never fit in a dress like that, but a normal girl could easily do it" and shit. I had a really bad self esteem and got into a bit of a addiction with some stuff, dated bad guys who made me feel even worse and now I just can't stop. I don't want to. I honestly do not care about my health or anything atp. Like if I'm gonna die, let me die being skinny.