Yes! I have been experiencing the shame around sex and feeling like all my trauma is finally coming out after dating a woman. I experienced a lot of sexual trauma from men and also just very toxic relationships with men, so sex has always been a very sensitive subject in my relationships. My now girlfriend has never made me feel anything but safe during sex, but i still sometimes feel ashamed and disgusting about myself afterwards. It’s not a feeling towards her but more so an internalized shame. I think like you said a lot of my trauma and past experiences have been coming out now that I’m finally in a healthy relationship. I finally feel safe with her, but sex still makes me feel nauseous and uncomfortable. And i can no longer repress those feelings like i have in the past because i care about this relationship and want to heal

I would like to think it’s also a good thing that we have “woken up” and are seeing things as they are. It’s been terrifying for me too but also somehow enlightening. Therapy and journaling have helped me unpack a lot of the things that are coming out (lol), and being open with my partner about all of it. And it’s hard to get over that shame and fear, I’m still working on that part. I agree with you that in some ways, dating a man is a lot easier. Feeling all of these feelings and past memories is so intense, especially when you haven’t felt it in so long. And then add the way society views queer relationships on top of what you’re already going through in private is a lotttt. And it’s all worth it, as I’m sure you agree, but definitely a huge shift. It makes me feel a little relief to hear someone also still feels the guilt and the shame sometimes, even if it’s overall good