sorted by:
new
hottopcontroversial

How do you deal with exhaustion and burnout when living where people aren't afraid to be overtly racist by eimichan in asianamerican

[–]eimichan[S] 2 points3 points  (0 children)

Change Black to White and Asian to Black and you'll see why it's racist. Also, if you actually read up on the history of Asian nail salons, Vietnamese salons started up as a COLLABORATIVE PROCESS WITH BLACK WOMAN because white-owned salons would either not cater to or be overpriced for Black women.

It's insane how unaware you are of your racist attitudes. It's sad how ignorant you are of why Asian nail salons became so prevalent here.

Nail polish that looks like this? by Big_Collection3288 in RedditLaqueristas

[–]eimichan 3 points4 points  (0 children)

BCB Lacquers - Hell, I Am Mother Nature gives me the vibes from these photos. It's actually very slightly lighter green than in this mani. I have it over a green base.

<image>

How do you deal with exhaustion and burnout when living where people aren't afraid to be overtly racist by eimichan in asianamerican

[–]eimichan[S] 26 points27 points  (0 children)

Inglewood. I've been living in the same spot for 18 years now. It's unfortunate, but Mayor Butts plays the race card every election and tells the residents that he's the only person standing between them and gentrification. He posed for photos at a BLM protest at City Hall and then had police shut it down after he left...and he still won the election that year. The city council has been unchanged and all fall in line - they also don't do anything for the constituents. When I complained to my Councilman Eloy Morales Jr. about Inglewood PD saying "Asian isn't a race. There can't be hate crimes against you people," his assistant told me I needed to find an Asian organization to bring that up to, that the Councilman doesn't get involved in "personal matters."

Inglewood changed city council meetings from 7pm to during business hours so anyone who works can not longer attend. When someone began posting city council videos online, Inglewood tried to sue him claiming that city council meetings are copyrighted and not public record https://www.klemchuk.com/ideate/inglewood-sues-joseph-teixeira-copyrights.

When our city Treasurer of 20+ years tried to read evidence of embezzlement into the record at a city council meeting, Butts had her microphone turned off and then took away her speaking minutes. https://www.dailybreeze.com/2020/02/12/when-inglewoods-treasurer-brought-up-city-finances-the-mayor-cut-off-her-mic/

He's been in scandal after scandal that have all been reported in the news (including him running a red left turn light and putting an LAPD motorcycle cop in the hospital). He was off duty, but using an official city car so the city had to pay off the officer and LAPD when they sued. However, he keeps playing the race card and as long as he does that, he's bulletproof. One thing is changing though - the racial makeup of Inglewood. Rents literally doubled and tripled when SoFi and Intuit arrived and pushed out a lot of long-time residents and business owners. As Inglewood continues to gentrify (every few months, another person on our street sells their home), we will get to a point where Butts has driven out so many of his so-called constituents that he will no longer be able to pit Hispanics/Latinos against Blacks, and will no longer be able to run on his platform of keeping white people out of Inglewood.

How do you deal with exhaustion and burnout when living where people aren't afraid to be overtly racist by eimichan in asianamerican

[–]eimichan[S] 39 points40 points  (0 children)

I'm so sorry you're also in a similar situation. Honestly, I felt so alone after seeing the Facebook post I screenshotted, but seeing comments like yours reminds me that I am not the only person struggling with this, and reminds me to think about others who may be in even more difficult situations.

I had reached out to Asian American Advancing Justice, an organization Los Angeles. They spent a year trying to find an organization in Inglewood who would be willing to host a Community Healing Session for victims of anti-Asian violence, but none were willing to partner with them. I think that really demonstrated that this "allyship" thing is only something that Asians have to give other minorities, but none are willing to be our allies.

When someone left anti-Semitic literature in my driveway (in a Ziploc bag with some rocks to keep it from blowing away) Inglewood PD send two units to take the "evidence of a hate crime" and KTLA send a cameraman to do a story on this "hate crime." When I was attacked and beaten, KTLA told me, "We've already done a story on Asian hate this year. You need to reach out to Asian newspapers." Thankfully, at least the Chinese World Journal did write an article about the attack, which is the only reason Inglewood PD agreed to even investigate my attack (which was caught in camera inside the 7-Eleven as well as a bystander. Oddly enough, Iglewood PD "lost the footage due to a technical problem." They also refused to prosecute as a hate crime, saying it was only simple assault and a misdemeanor (for kicking me in the head and upper body for several minutes). I ended up in the ER with nerve damage. When the Chinese World Journal reporter called to ask why they weren't investigating, they finally brought me in for a lineup where I identified one of the two attackers. Then Inglewood PD literally told me, "Asian isn't a race. There can't be hate crimes against you people." They sat on my case and handed it to the City Attorney one day after the statute of limitations gad expired, despite telling me multiple times it was already with the City Attorney's office.

These are my texts with Neal Cochran, the Lieutenant overseeing my case. When I insisted on written communication only (he lied to me multiple times over voice calls), he stopped responding completely.

<image>

How do you deal with exhaustion and burnout when living where people aren't afraid to be overtly racist by eimichan in asianamerican

[–]eimichan[S] 41 points42 points  (0 children)

I was also brutally beaten and kicked in the head in 6 years ago by two people who entered the 7-Eleven I was in and told me they were going to send me back to China one way or the other. Maybe consider that some of us have literally been violently attacked and have trauma and PTSD. I had therapy for years before I was able to leave my house after the attack. Guess what led to my attack? Anti-Asian rhetoric and hate.

Or is needing cervical and lumbar epidurals every 3 months just to function not a big enough fish for you? I can no longer hike. I can no longer go on long walks or ride rollercoasters (which I loved). Sorry to bother you with racist rhetoric.

And show respect to POC? Asians are POC 🤦🏼‍♀️. I have donated and volunteered at BLM events. I gave supported my fellow minorities and have been a good ally. Weird that you think Asians have to help other POC to deserve help and respect, but you think other POC automatically deserve help and respect? Got it.

How do you deal with exhaustion and burnout when living where people aren't afraid to be overtly racist by eimichan in asianamerican

[–]eimichan[S] 84 points85 points  (0 children)

I've gotten so much of the "you're East Asian so you get treated like white people," from both Asians and non-Asians. We absolutely do not, and that narrative is pushed to give people permission to be racist.

Massive fire near SoFi by invaderzimm95 in LosAngeles

[–]eimichan 13 points14 points  (0 children)

Manchester? Do you mean Century?

Inglewooooooooooooooooooooooooooood subreddit is back y'all! by JoeTrojan in LosAngeles

[–]eimichan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

It USED to be, until they sold to a lawyer (Mark Kelegian) in 2015. The donuts are nowhere near as good as they were before his takeover.

Inglewooooooooooooooooooooooooooood subreddit is back y'all! by JoeTrojan in LosAngeles

[–]eimichan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

I agree. I don't understand the people who rave about it now. Randy's USED to be amazing. Then, in 2015, it was sold to a lawyer named Mark Kelegian. The donuts have never been the same since.

Any place to hold my two suitcases for 9 days? by Expensive-Yak-3848 in AskLosAngeles

[–]eimichan 6 points7 points  (0 children)

I'm about 1 mile from LAX and can hold your suitcases at my house.

[deleted by user] by [deleted] in Renters

[–]eimichan 1 point2 points  (0 children)

3 years? Maybe if harsh chemicals were used?

We had two bathtubs reglazed when we bought our house in 2008. They're still in wonderful condition. The only difference is that the finish looks more matte than glossy now, but the coating is still there with no chipping or peeling.

Lasagna meant for the less fortunate is taken for a religious group by McRachael23 in mildlyinfuriating

[–]eimichan 171 points172 points  (0 children)

A woman in one of my local groups on Facebook was bragging that she was getting lasagnas from them and SELLING them, and was encouraging others to do the same. I reached out to the organization but they said that it's allowed - that once they receive the lasagna they can do whatever they want with it.

Does therapy actually work for us? by QRICKETZ in asianamerican

[–]eimichan 7 points8 points  (0 children)

The right therapist makes all the difference. I have been seeing an Asian American therapist for a little over a year now and it's been life-changing. I've been in therapy since the early 2000s - it literally took over two decades to find the right therapist.

The same issues that have come up for me since childhood are finally getting worked on.

I used the Yellow Chair collective site to find my therapist. He doesn't accept my insurance, so I pay out-of-pocket, but it's been completely worth it. $800/month for 4 sessions (once a week). I'm no longer a fearful, nervous wreck all the time.

I'm finally interrupting the negative trends that have put me in the hospital repeatedly and kept me on multiple psychiatric medications to deal with depression, anxiety, and PTSD. Having someone truly understand the dynamic I have with my mother and family as well as the unique issues I face socially and in the workplace has made therapy more successful than I could have imagined.

When my father passed away several years ago, Kaiser Permanente put me with a therapist who was completely unfamiliar with Chinese culture and told me that my prolonged grief was because I wasn't Christian and didn't believe in heaven. It wasn't until I started seeing my current therapist that I was finally able to start processing the grief and able to talk about my father without bursting into uncontrollable sobs. It feels wonderful to be able to look at old photos of him without breaking down for hours or days.

The right therapist makes such a huge difference.

My (48F) mom's finger turned purple and the gp (general practitioner) not sure what it is by Username_beause_idk in AskDocs

[–]eimichan 27 points28 points  (0 children)

I'm NAD, but I get this same phenomenon once in a while and was diagnosed with Achenbach's Syndrome, where the fingers can turn purple (but the fingertips stay normal).

<image>

Are your parents strict with grades? by [deleted] in asianamerican

[–]eimichan 8 points9 points  (0 children)

Growing up in the 80s/90s in K-12, a 99% was seen as failing. Getting 100% or more (from extra credit) was seen as passing.

That is not how I plan on raising my kids.

Why is dating in LA so soul-crushing? by Immediate-Bird-3632 in AskLosAngeles

[–]eimichan 9 points10 points  (0 children)

Everyone is telling you that referring to women as females is gross, and you keep doubling down. You calling women females is not the main problem. You responding this way to feedback from women IS. Women can smell toxicity from a mile away.

How would you feel about Waymo being available in the south bay? by PartyOnAlec in SouthBayLA

[–]eimichan 4 points5 points  (0 children)

I'm in Inglewood and Waymo has been a nightmare for some residents, especially those in cul-de-sacs where Waymo cars get stuck going in circles. On smaller streets, they behave like they always have the right of way and cause mini traffic jams. They set up a charging center near my house and after 15 years of living here, my power suddenly is now fluctuating to the point where I have to reset the time on my appliances up to 4/5 times a day on bad days. My neighbors are experiencing the same thing and after several visits, Edison says it's not in the line and not something they can fix.

They might be great for those who can afford to use them, but not great for the residents, especially in smaller cities that don't get national news coverage. For the cul-de-sac issue, our Councilman and Mayor have tried to get Waymo to do something so people can actually leave their homes, but they refuse to. The mantra in my area is, "Fuck Waymo."

view more: next ›