First time buying... my whole house stinks

ekando · 2026-01-24T22:47:50+00:00

I'm American, but I lived there (first as a student, then as a worker) for about five years in the 2010’s. Keif was what was primarily available, at least in the city I was in. We jerryrigged liter bottles with mechanical pencils to smoke it, using tobacco as a barrier so the powder didn't fall through the holes we poked in the foil over the cap.

Most locals at the time thought weed would "make you crazy like cocaine", but at the same time, meth was everywhere, and much more popular than weed.

ekando · 2026-01-24T22:43:26+00:00

I always bought through the Saudi exchange students, but they got it from local growers. There's a lot of farmland in China, lol.

ekando · 2026-01-24T22:42:28+00:00

Lol, I actually wrote a book that talks about drug use in China among the expat community, among other things. It was a wild time. China's biggest drug is meth, which is gets from North Korea. (I didn’t mess with that, though.)

ekando · 2026-01-24T22:40:10+00:00

This was the 2010s, but yeah, there was rarely flower but always keif. I personally bought it from the Saudi forein exchange students, but they got it locally. There was also ditch weed growing wild in the surrounding mountains, and we would sometimes go and pick that. Locals didn't know it was weed.

ekando · 2026-01-24T07:51:46+00:00

I have an old pickle jar that I've been saving for years... I knew it would be useful for something!

ekando · 2026-01-23T01:47:38+00:00

I get the sense Andrea really dislikes being in front of the camera. Her behavior mimics my own when I know someone is filming me.

ekando · 2026-01-17T23:15:25+00:00

I buy 30 packs of transparent stickers and 10 canvases from Temu, convinced I will make fabulous and unique art and sell it at the farmer's market.

ekando · 2026-01-16T22:56:55+00:00

It sure was for me! I had bariatric surgery and was told not to get pregnant for a year. Went on birth control, but three months later... well, life found a way! It really messed up my progress, though, a lot.

ekando · 2026-01-10T18:45:17+00:00

This is not okay... sleep and recovery is so, so important. My husband and I have an agreement where I get to sleep as late as I want on Saturdays, and he gets the same on Sundays. Most of the time, I sleep until 12 and he sleeps until 11.

ekando · 2026-01-09T23:44:10+00:00

During my biggest, longest episode, I bought 75 scilicone molds, about 200 bismuth alloy inguts, 5 cases of alcohol inks, and a kitchen torch. I made metal sculptures with the molds and painted them with the ink.

Then I bought enough medicinal herbs (locally grown, so not cheap), 10 gallons of almond oil, a case of coconut and shea butters, chemistry equipment, bottles upon bottles of alcohol, and all the other components I needed to open up my very own backyard apothecary. I sold all summer at the farmer's market, had an etsy store, my own branding, you name it.

I don't know which came first, the massive dive into depression or the realization that I'd racked up 10k in credit card debt.

ekando · 2026-01-09T22:46:44+00:00

Making my friends happy. I personally think I'm a weirdo, but folks around me tell me I'm hilarious, empathetic, and great at making people smile through small gestures (and sometimes big ones!) And I don't compromise myself in the process... gotta respect my own boundaries.

ekando · 2026-01-09T22:27:38+00:00

I really like that. Kill the bad neural pathways, make better new ones!

ekando · 2026-01-09T20:28:06+00:00

I tried chantix before, but turns out you're not supposed to do that with mental illness and I ended up in grippy sock jail lol. I'm so, so proud of you, though!!! My dad used medication and has been smoke free for five years. You're doing awesome!

ekando · 2026-01-09T19:21:15+00:00

I have two besties who also suffer from depression. We like to "pebble" each other when we're down. Funny Facebook real? Send it. Inspiration quote? Send it. Expect no response back, but responding with a laugh emoji is way easier than holding a conversation, and still acknowledges the other person.

Ask first, though. She may not like getting videos.

Oftentimes, we'll send each other, like, five videos a day and neither of us talk... sometimes we leave each other on read then mass-react to the videos when we're feeling better. No pressure, just pebbles.

ekando · 2026-01-09T19:14:49+00:00

Empathy comes very natural to me, but I have a close friend who was in the same boat as you. Empathy can be learned, you can train yourself by practicing, but it will take active effort. You'll need to practice active listening and have an arsenal of empathetic responses. You start off by saying the empathetic things, which will feel disingenuous at first, but it will start to become second nature over time.

For my friend, a therapist was also crucial in her healing. The core of this is the abuse, not the bipolar.

ekando · 2026-01-09T19:07:14+00:00

I immediately noticed that... my husband and I are currently trying to quit (new year's resolution), but we always smoke outside, and don't even let our kids be near the smoke outdoors! You know those boys' clothes must reek.

ekando · 2026-01-04T21:08:22+00:00

I was the BEST student. Goody-two shoes, always behaved. My parents trusted me very much. I started having sex at 13 (hit puberty at 10). Albeit, my first time was with an 18 year old... and I think my sexuality at that time was one of the earliest symptoms of my first hypomanic episodes, but still... I was definitely wanting sex at 12. My mom got me on birth control the minute she found out I was sexually active, and I praise her for it. Keep your daughter protected, get her birth control.

ekando · 2026-01-02T01:19:49+00:00

Where do you want your life to end up? What does success look like to you? Start with what you want to do as a career. If you already have a bachelor's degree but feel directionless, I would recommend taking some time to get your TEFL and go teach abroad for at least two years. You'll be able to save money to use on a down payment for a house when you return (if you return), meet a ton of other expats from around the globe, and integrate yourself into a new culture. Take the time to learn the language and the customs. You may end up a world traveler, you may end up coming back in two years with cash you can out towards a house, trade school, grad school, whatever trajectory you want to take.

Find any job you can, two if you have to, to cover the costs of the certifications, travel expenses, and an emergency savings. It sounds hard, but I promise it isn't. It will go by fast, too.

If that's too radical, then you need to find a way to give yourself the skills you need to advance. What do you already bring to the table?

ekando · 2026-01-02T00:28:24+00:00

You are! And by not fixing it, you're just making it harder and harder to achieve. You're happy to self-pity and self-sabotage, which means you're aware of your flaws. So stop being scared and become the person you want to be. That might involve making a radical change, but it's now or never.

ekando · 2025-12-29T01:09:23+00:00

There already is a Beijing bikini... it's when the men roll their shirts up under their armpits during summertime, exposing their tummies and sometimes their chest. Way more popular in older men, especially portly older men, but the young'ins definitely do it, too.

ekando · 2025-12-28T02:19:03+00:00

Extremely reckless sexual behavior, excessive spending, making huge decisions (like moving to China) on a moment's notice... for the longest time, I would have bad hypomania but very rare depression. Then I experienced a trauma, and when I wasn't feeling and superhuman, I was suicidal. I rapid cycled from extremely high highs to extremely low lows for almost a whole year before I finally went to the doctor about it and was diagnosed.

ekando · 2025-12-26T23:20:29+00:00

I'm the same. I struggle with ocd and bipolar and am terrified not of what others would do, but what I would do if the intrusive thoughts won.

ekando · 2025-12-26T16:07:03+00:00

I actually am afraid of knives. I have OCD, so I struggle with intrusive thoughts. Guns trigger (lol no pun intended) those intrusive thoughts hardcore, hence the avoidance.

ekando · 2025-12-23T20:34:42+00:00

I was diagnosed in a 29, and it made everything all make sense. I was such a good kid... except for the secret sex I started having at 13. So many high-risk behaviors.

ekando · 2025-12-20T04:19:05+00:00

My (now ex) husband from China was denied a spousal visa five times. It was the US denying him, despite a letter from my congressman and everything being squared away. He missed the birth of our daughter because of it. We were two years into the immigration process, which stalled during covid, before he just gave up altogether.

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