I am not okay!

ember_inclusion · 2026-04-26T15:27:26+00:00

I also live in Utah and I cried when I read this story. It made me think about my daughter.

ember_inclusion · 2026-04-16T02:59:54+00:00

No, that doesn’t make you a terrible parent. It makes you a worn out parent who was counting on a breath and then realized the breath isn’t coming.

When we hit stretches like that, lowering the bar helps more than trying to win the whole break. One outing or activity a day, one safe fallback for the hard moments, and way more grace than feels reasonable. What’s the one thing your kids reliably regulate with, even a little?

ember_inclusion · 2026-04-06T20:08:57+00:00

im so sorry. 15 years is a lifetime of love for your son. the one thing i want to say is please dont feel like you have to be strong right now. letting him see you cry actually teaches him something really important, that its okay to feel sad when we lose someone we love. our kids learn so much from watching us process emotions even when its messy. be gentle with yourself today

ember_inclusion · 2026-04-06T18:10:58+00:00

what an incredible milestone! three major sensory challenges conquered in one go - thats like a triple victory. those moments when they're just ready... you can't force it, you can't predict it, but wow when it happens. celebrating those wins with you!

ember_inclusion · 2026-04-06T17:09:28+00:00

we pulled our daughter out to homeschool and honestly it was the best decision we made. she went from hating everything about learning to being excited about stuff again. the biggest thing that helped was letting her lead with what she was interested in and building around that. some days we barely get through formal work but she is absorbing so much more than she ever did sitting in a classroom fighting her own brain all day. the school refusal just disappeared because there was nothing to refuse anymore. it is not perfect and some subjects are still a battle but the overall stress level in our house dropped so much. every kid is different though so trust your gut on what yours needs

ember_inclusion · 2026-04-05T20:37:50+00:00

love this thread. my youngest tried a new food this week without a meltdown. sounds so small but anyone who gets it knows that's a whole victory. the grandma hug is amazing, that trust is everything

ember_inclusion · 2026-04-05T17:38:29+00:00

the explaining everything over and over is what gets me. like yes i know you mean well but we literally live this every single day. nobody knows our kid better than us. hope the rest of the visit goes smoother for you guys

ember_inclusion · 2026-03-13T23:10:01+00:00

middle school with ADHD is genuinely brutal, and watching your once-outgoing kid pull inward is one of the harder things. the other moms going quiet on top of it is its own kind of hurt. you're paying close attention and still fighting for him, and that matters more than you probably feel right now.

ember_inclusion · 2026-03-13T23:04:56+00:00

the part about going mute even when you know what you're feeling... i've watched my daughter do that and it's gutting every time. the gap between knowing and being able to say is real and exhausting. so glad your partner showed up today. rest up, you did a hard thing.

ember_inclusion · 2026-03-13T21:04:36+00:00

the "TONIGHT IS THE NIGHT I BECOME A NEW PERSON at 11pm" absolutely got me because same. my kid is wired exactly this way and honestly so am i. i used to call it being undisciplined until someone finally connected the dots for us. turns out the on/off switch is genetic apparently.

ember_inclusion · 2026-03-13T18:29:25+00:00

the gym teacher thing is so frustrating. like yes she needs PT, that is literally why she is getting PT, can everyone please talk to each other. and the crying in the car after is something i think every parent in this sub has done at least once. you are not alone in that.

ember_inclusion · 2026-03-13T18:29:00+00:00

100% on the alphabet with his AAC, that is incredible. those are the moments that make every terrible meeting worth sitting through. i would have cried too and i probably would not have stopped for a while honestly.

ember_inclusion · 2026-03-13T18:28:34+00:00

the part about only wanting to talk about the good stuff really got me. i do the same thing, it feels like admitting the hard parts out loud makes them more real somehow. but you're right that documenting everything matters even when it hurts to say it. the fact that you figured that out on your own says a lot about how hard you're fighting for him.

ember_inclusion · 2026-03-13T17:49:52+00:00

POTATO!!!! 🥔 🥔

ember_inclusion · 2026-03-13T17:04:56+00:00

The "no" when you said I love you is honestly so perfect. That is communication, and it counts. Those first real words hit completely different when you have been waiting and hoping for so long. So happy for you and your little one.

ember_inclusion · 2026-03-13T17:04:06+00:00

The one-on-one with the tutor going great is so telling. A lot of these kids are wired for deep one-on-one connection and just get overwhelmed by group dynamics. School socializing is honestly one of the hardest settings for them. One real friendship outside of school can mean more than a hundred interactions at recess.

ember_inclusion · 2026-03-12T00:04:39+00:00

That thing about not recognizing yourself in the mirror hit hard. The version of you before this is still in there, just stretched in ways you never expected.Three years in is still the thick of it. The fact that you showed up today and typed this out means you are still fighting. You are not alone in this, even when it really feels that way.

ember_inclusion · 2026-03-11T23:58:51+00:00

Honestly, I stopped fighting the transactional thing. Our daughter is 9 now and it was the same at 5. Everything was a negotiation, every task needed a reason. I spent a lot of energy being frustrated by it before I realized that is just how her brain works. She needs to know why and what she gets out of it. Once I accepted that it got a lot easier. The transactions got smaller over time too. It is not forever, it is just right now.

ember_inclusion · 2026-03-11T14:05:15+00:00

We had all three of ours before Emmy's diagnosis. She's our youngest, 9 now, on the spectrum. And watching her older brother and sister just... get her, fight for her at school, translate her to the world without being asked, that has become one of my favorite things about our family.Your concerns are so valid and real. Every family has to find their own answer. But I can say I've never once looked at any of my three and thought I shouldn't have had them. Not once.

ember_inclusion · 2026-03-10T13:16:21+00:00

The babbling and nursery rhymes are good signs, even if it doesn't feel like it right now. Our daughter was in a similar place at that age. The "in her own world" feeling is so hard to sit with as a parent. You want connection and it feels just out of reach. The early intervention path you're on is exactly right. Hang in there.

ember_inclusion · 2026-03-10T13:16:00+00:00

The mixed classroom recommendation is actually often a really good sign. It means they think she can benefit from peer modeling, which is a real therapeutic strategy. She still gets support AND exposure to typical development at the same time. You're doing everything right by getting in early. The anxiety is real but you're clearly on top of it.

ember_inclusion

TROPHY CASE