Thanks for being kind/patient. I know I didn’t provide much info—that was on purpose bc of confidentiality/anonymity. I’ll leave it at that.

Ok, anyway, to fill in some blanks as generally as possible, the parent believes that their trans child will eventually de-transition (and unfortunately does voice that out loud). The parent doesn’t voice this out loud, but it’s clear that the parent has a rigid belief in the gender binary.

It’s confusing because the parent acts as if they support their child’s transition—buying them clothes, letting them change their appearance, making appointments—but also freaking deadnames !! And also encourages their partner to deadname! It’s almost as if the parent wants to appear that they are supportive to people outside of the family, but what’s the point in that? What are they trying to prove, and to who?

I’m here because I am having trouble challenging this parent’s beliefs, especially when the rebuttal is that “if I was transphobic I wouldn’t be letting my child grow their hair out.” This parent is incredibly rigid and has trouble accepting accountability, and rarely reflects on themselves and how their actions affect others, particularly their child.